The Daft Things DCAs say or write

[babybear39]

My debts went away. So did the DCA's, so they must have tolerated my situation.

 

So did mine when I got to breaking point when some lovely guy from sechari clark & mitchell told me the classic 'but you can't afford to go bankrupt'. I called CCCS and they put me in touch with a previous employers charity and what do you know? I went bankrupt on 1st November last year and was discharged on 16th July this year. No more debt, DCAs, smarmy solicitors etc. thanks to the stupid idiot at **** Cheers, luv, you did me the best favour ever

Edited September 19, 2008 by babybear39
spelling

[Fred Bassett]

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned MBNA yet, so here are a couple of my favourites from them:

 

"We haven't given up on you"

 

"We have removed your telephone numbers from our systems but if you don't contact us within 15 days we'll reinstate them".

 

I like this thread - it's a bit like one of those discussion about everybody's favourite sketch from Only Fools and Horses.

 

Regards.

 

Fred

[TheChancellor]

under rossendales letter head it says PROUD TO BE PROFESSIONALS OMG

 

Bodie & Doyle LOL:p

 

Watch them come door-knocking in the souped-up Capri pmsl.

[fuzzybobble]

Or in reality a 10 year old Saxo with a turbo badge, Halfords ironing board meccano spoiler, and an exhaust you could lose a family of rabbits in.

 

 

Something a little like this.

 

Four Five inch exhausts for a 1.2 litre engine.

 

It must sound like a bumble bee farting in a baked bean tin.

Edited September 19, 2008 by fuzzybobble

[74656]

Or in reality a 10 year old Saxo with a turbo badge, Halfords ironing board meccano spoiler, and an exhaust you could lose a family of rabbits in.

 

 

Something a little like this.

 

Four Five inch exhausts for a 1.2 litre engine.

 

It must sound like a bumble bee farting in a baked bean tin.

 

FOR THE LOVE OF JACKET POTATOES, FB, you seriously crack me up. Oh christ I wish you could be my debt counsellor.

[mr.ton]

'' This situation will not be tolerated ''

 

I do like that one

[babybear39]

Two seperate DCA harridons screamed down the phone at me that they were goign to report me to my local social services because I'm too ill and disabled to look after my daughter...She's almost 16

[zazen.warrior]

Capquest : 'It is apparent that we need to start the litigation process to resolve this matter'

 

I was thinking the same thing myself :)

Edited September 20, 2008 by zazen.warrior

[ODC]

Two seperate DCA harridons screamed down the phone at me that they were goign to report me to my local social services because I'm too ill and disabled to look after my daughter...She's almost 16

That just goes to show that there really are no depths that a DCA Threat Monkey wont step to in their greed. Still, you have your disability and can cope with it and you also have your pride. These ill breds have no pride, low self esteem and do'nt know what misforturne will befall them in the future. What goes around comes around. KARMA

[babybear39]

I cope really well with my disabilities. I get help from DLA, DSA and my university.

 

Had to laugh at 1st crud last year when I said I was going to become a student and the stupid bint on the end of the phone said 'oh , we'll take your grant, loan and DSA as well as your DLA'. DSA is paid direct to suppliers mostly

[ODC]

The DCA threat monkeys are so full of shine its unbelievable. I actually think they are so stupid they actually believe the verbal diahorrea that emanates from their mouths

[cashins]

The one that really walked into it was the bloke from MBNA who said

 

"There's no need to be rude"

 

I said, (in a conversational tone)

 

Really? Sooooooooooo, what are you going to do about it..........................................................ar*ehole?

 

Couldn't help it:grin::grin:

[honey5]

according to moorcroft i took a card out on the 30th feb 2009:eek:

wonder why i havent heard from them in 6 months

honey x

[onecall1]

What a chuckle I have had reading this thread. I have seen them all over the past two years and its nice to see that we can keep our sense of humour. The best one I have seen recently is from Rockwell

 

We are here to help resolve your problem.

 

Funny thing is its not my problem its theirs. They have bought a debt for which there is no CCA...................the fourth time its been sold in a year!

 

I have told them they have been duped and once again its been sold. Another round of letters coming up.

[sillygirl1]

I like the latest from Robinson Way

 

APPOINTMENT FOR HOME VISIT - for a debt which has a Notice of Discontinuance on it

 

Your debt is still unpaid in spite of previous letters, and calls (not to me you havent, and letters are in the hands of Trading Standards). Before Court Action is considered (its already taken place and your clients lost...)

we will arrange for a local collector to call upon you at home, to agree an affordable payment plan with you (0.00 and £5,000 compensation thanks).

 

YOUR ACCOUNT WILL BE SENT TO OUR

 

LOCAL COLLECTOR IN 10 DAYS TIME

 

Call us if you would prefer to agree a payment plan (like 0.00 as it's already been to court and Notice of Discontinuance issued) to this office, or if you wish to arrange an appointment for our collector to visit you (they will be given a copy of the Notice of Discontinuance and told to go forth and NOT multiply).

[mr.ton]

The really hillarious thing is all these DCA's buying up debts, regardless of weather there is a CCA or not....that they are utterley powerless to collect on unless they go to the County Court

[cashins]

Yeah but if they buy enough of these old debts for peanuts they only need a tiny fraction to work and still make a load of money.

 

Where some of these dumbos go wrong is they just do not seem to recognise the point to say ok, foget that one, bang on with the rest.

 

It is well known in banking circles that there are huge profits to be made out of high risk/defaulted accounts.

 

Trick is to get the sums right, as the mainstream banks just found out.

 

David

[mr.ton]

Yeah but if they buy enough of these old debts for peanuts they only need a tiny fraction to work and still make a load of money.

 

The more people find this site...the less of them that will work

[cashins]

Agree, have a look at the credit report here:

 

HFO Services - Company House info

 

:D:D

 

David

 

Could be the money has found a 'place in the sun' though.

[citizenB]

http://www.consumeractiongroup.co.uk/forum/mbna/57846-debt-written-off-due-34.html#post1537249

 

Davey77 received a letter from Moorcroft advising that they had "confirmed with a major utility company of his occupancy of the address" one that he has been corresponding from for quite a while !

 

MBNA advised me that even if I was to choose bankruptcy as a way out of my ownership of debt to them.. I would require all my creditors to agree.. and they wouldnt ??.

 

LTSB... "Just because we cant find your agreement at this precise moment.. Doesnt mean to say there isnt one... somewhere "? They have had the CCA request since January 12th

Edited September 21, 2008 by citizenB

[pookeymonkey]

"It is clear that there is an impasse here with regard to your account"

Moorcroft 2008

 

What the hell is that supposed to mean LOL

 

 

 

I got one of those, so I looked it up!!

 

impasse Show phonetics

noun

a situation in which further development is impossible:

The dispute had reached an impasse, as neither side would compromise.

 

Basically Moorcrofts way of saying 'You were right, there is no CCA, We're screwed!!'

 

Pookey

[TheChancellor]

"It is clear that there is an impasse here with regard to your account"

Moorcroft 2008

 

What the hell is that supposed to mean LOL

 

Should have thought it was obvious with Moorcroft - they can't pass anything i.e. they're full of ****:grin:

[mr.ton]

I suppose the obvious 1 that i dont think anyone has mentioned so far is when they say "We are disappointed"......awwww bless em

Edited September 21, 2008 by mr.ton

[Fred Bassett]

Well Moorcroft Pre Pubescent have just given up on me too. Shame, I was enjoying our little battle. Maybe I'll get another DCA to play with. Moorcroft used that other immortal phrase "we have decided on this occasion and on purely economic grounds alone to close this account and we will take no further action at this time." This is an even more long-winded way of saying "we're stuffed"

 

Fred

[mr.ton]

at this time

 

They just cant let it go with ease can they eh? they just have to add these stupid comments on at the end