Cheekiness towards a DCA

[babybear39]

ROFPMSL ODC

[fuzzybobble]

Probably Jehovas's Witnesses. My Gran waved a carving knife at one through the kitchen window while she was carving the sunday roast. 5 years later and they've not been back.

Like garlic bread, it may be the future.

 

 

 

 

Or like oral sex, the taste of things to come........

 

[tifo]

now now ....

 

:o

[mrmarmite]

DCAs callers operate in teams of three. One can read, one can write and the third one is there to keep an eye on the two smartasses

 

and there is me hoping they are the three monkys.

 

Hear no evil

see no evil

speak no evil

[fuzzybobble]

It's four monkeys....

 

Hear no evil

see no evil

speak no evil

 

Do no evil......

 

[loyalbrummie]

Religion is my guess Don't know which is worse lol...

 

I had 2 well dressed women knock on my door the other day and ask me what bread i ate , i replied White thick cut bread why ?

They then spent the next 20 mins telling me of the goodness that was brown bread and how my life would change for the better if i changed to brown bread .

 

 

BLOODY HOVIS WITNESSES

 

 

Im here all week

[mrmarmite]

I cant beleive what I just done. i got a threat-O-Matic from robbing way today so I just had to e-mail then straight away coz they "intend" to take me to court in 7 days time, I'm so worried I just simply had to e-mail them. the contents of my e-mail was :

 

 

 

 

Nice to see your threat-o-matic printer is still working ok judging by your letter dated 28/3/08.

 

You CLAIM that you intend to take me to court unless I contact you within 7 days. Well here you go I've contacted you.

 

I am assuming this is just YET another of your very pathetic empty threats, BUT I really, really WISH you would take me to court, I'd love to file a counter claim against you but I would so love to see the person you hire/solicitor get a slap by the judge and see him/her walk out of court red faced.

 

Please feel free to start legal proceedings against me, INFACT I invite you to take me to court. If I don't receive anything from a court lets say in the next 3 weeks I'll do it for you and take you to court.

 

 

MrMarmite

 

P.S nearly forgot, I DO NOT ACKNOWLEDGE THIS DEBT

and yes I did put the in the e-mail

[fuzzybobble]

I had 2 well dressed women knock on my door the other day and ask me what bread i ate , i replied White thick cut bread why ?

They then spent the next 20 mins telling me of the goodness that was brown bread and how my life would change for the better if i changed to brown bread .

 

 

BLOODY HOVIS WITNESSES

 

 

Im here all week

 

Hey LB, long time no see. Good joke too. We were beginning to think you were dead or been kidnapped by a DCA to work in their call centre.

 

Welcome back

[loyalbrummie]

still around FB , winding them up , they now hang up when they realise who i am , so im gonna start using a different route to get on their nerves .

[fuzzybobble]

Mrmarmite? Can I use your letter as a template please?

I need to tell Halifax how I really feel without resorting

to bad language and wearing trakkie bottoms with a

can of stella in each pocket.

And in 2 weeks time I willm have to send the FOS a copy

and I want them to come on here and give me another

green blob to go with the two hard earned ones I have already.

[mrmarmite]

of course you can

 

I done FOS form 2nite so i spose i better send it off not that they will do anything

[fuzzybobble]

still around FB , winding them up , they now hang up when they realise who i am , so im gonna start using a different route to get on their nerves .

 

If you had as many DCA's as I do calling, you can afford to spread yourself around a bit so they don't keep hanging up on you. I call them back if they hang up and keep asking why they don't want to speak to me.

Like Mrmarmite does. Beg them to take you to court and ask, if not, why not?

I have a new script lined up for a call to my new mates Eversheds Solicitors soon. I wonder how they will react when I quote the law at an alledged professional firm of solicitors and keep asking why they don't know the basics of the CCA 1974 when my 87 year old Gran and my pet cat do, and then burst into tears when they won't start immediate court action to get a charging order to get my gingerbread man collection taken away from me. :D

[fuzzybobble]

I had 2 well dressed women knock on my door the other day and ask me what bread i ate , i replied White thick cut bread why ?

They then spent the next 20 mins telling me of the goodness that was brown bread and how my life would change for the better if i changed to brown bread .

 

 

BLOODY HOVIS WITNESSES

 

 

Im here all week

 

Ok 2 questions.....What are two well dressed women doing knocking on your door? and second, what are two well dressed women doing in Birmingham in the first place?

 

They should come to Stoke on Trent and learn how to dress in sportswear, + cheap Argos jewellery, but have a heart attack if they have to run more than 20 metres in the opposite direction of a pub or takeaway. And when lying in agony on the ground, still accuse the paramedics of touching them up while smoking a fag and swearing like a trooper.

Look up Stoke on Trent on ChavTowns for a full review of wha we have to put up with around here.

 

But don't ever search for images on Google with the safe search turned off, and use the keyword "tubgirl".

 

The most disturbing sentence ever to be posted on the internet!!!!!!!!!!

 

DISCLAIMER.....

 

As they say on Braniac.........Don't try this at home............No, Don't.....

 

You have been warned, but I know you'll all look anyway.

 

Don't come on here and blame me for food n drink spat on keyboards and monitors. Vomit anywhere at all, or wet pants due to excessive laughter.

And servers crashing due to peeps emailing the link to friends.

 

Mr Bobble is not responsible for anything that happens as a result of reading this thread.

 

 

Ok. OK Confession time.....OK, so I looked when my friend told me about the Google search thing. Even I was shocked when I saw the search results.........and that's from someone who collects gingerbread men and finds Japanese porn amusing. eek

[cashins]

Mr Marmite

 

Have to say I like your letter.

 

It is marginally more more polite than sending a parcel with a note suggesting they donate the ring pull to charity.

 

David

 

ps they can keep the grenade.

[mrmarmite]

Mr Marmite

 

Have to say I like your letter.

 

It is marginally more more polite than sending a parcel with a note suggesting they donate the ring pull to charity.

 

David

 

ps they can keep the grenade.

 

lol ty

 

yes it is polite, I wonder IF they might actually understand it, you gotta keep it "simple" for these simple folks that work for DCA's

[babybear39]

ROFPMSL...I shall reply in the morning

[fuzzybobble]

And with what will you reply with? Our favourite, welsh type, Babybear39? Make it a good one. There's a lot of peoples faith and reputations riding on what you write next.

 

Not that we want to put you under any pressure or anything.

[BellaGoth]

This thread was highly entertaining, thanks for the laughs. I hope if I get phone calls from my DCA I'll have your courage.

[babybear39]

Hi Bella

 

If you can't laugh at the outright BS and lies these DCAs come out with then they've won. Here you'll find the lighter side and also some excellent coping strategies to help with those darker moments when you want to flush your phone down the loo

 

If you do get a nasty call from a DCA, remember it's your phone and you can do with it what you want including, but not limited to, hanging up on them A smart commentary is hilarious but hanging up is very satisfying too

[Seahorse]

Cabot no longer phone me.

 

But my last email to them went something like this... well, EXACTLY like this, to be honest...

 

Thank you for your letter of 11 February 2008, the contents of which have certainly given me a good chuckle and brightened my day. I shall decide at a later date whether or not to send Cabot an invoice for dry cleaning the cornflakes out of my suit.

 

However, I do feel that despite your indication that you have recently reviewed my account, the very fact that you seem to be under the misapprehension that there is any likelihood of me paying Cabot a penny in relation to said account suggests to me that your system has merely flagged up a memo for someone to fire up Cabot’s template-o-matic in preparation of despatching yet another meaningless missive.

 

In view of the above, perhaps you would be well advised to actually take the time to read the various communications which have flitted between me and various members of Cabot staff since this pantomime began. I suggest that this exercise will serve to dissuade you from taking whatever action it is that you may be contemplating, although you have failed to mention exactly what form that proposed action should take. I think you’ll find that, as Cabot (in whatever corporate hat they are wearing these days) have failed miserably so far to persuade me that the amount you quote is at all due to them, I shall not be taking you up on your kind offer of paying Cabot the disputed sum of £2032.14. Applied interest of £293.30 is, I’m afraid, totally out of the question for similar reasons.

 

Whilst you do that, I’ll play your silly game and attempt to glean some sense from yet another drone in the Cabot hive. To that end, I would like to ask you to explain in concise terms exactly how you have arrived at a figure of £293.30 in accrued interest. In doing so I shall expect to see some evidence of whatever interest rate that has been applied in its calculation, and the legal basis for that interest rate. This should include an indication of the original interest rate that was agreed between me and Barclaycard originally, if (and I stress the word IF) such a legally enforceable agreement exists. Use the margin if you need to for your working out.

 

To assist further in your education, I should like to draw your attention to the following extract from the Consumer Credit Act 1974, an act which you should make yourself familiar with to assist you in your chosen career of debt collection:

 

Consumer Credit Act 1974 s 127(3)

“(3) The court shall not make an enforcement order under section 65(1) if section 61(1)(a) (signing of agreements) was not complied with unless a document (whether or not in the prescribed form and complying with regulations under section 60(1)) itself containing all the prescribed terms of the agreement was signed by the debtor or hirer (whether or not in the prescribed manner).”

Now, you may be wondering why I have drawn your attention to that particular piece of legislation. I am aware that your company is under the impression that that the quoted section was repealed by the Consumer Credit Act 2006 and has quite possibly been remiss in advising you as to its Bona Fides in this matter. Let me enlighten you further; the CCA 2006 is NOT retrospective. Therefore Section 127(3) is still a valid defence in my particular case. For your homework, you should examine the document that Cabot will be relying on should this matter come to court, and see if you agree with Mr Wellinghoff’s assertion that it is indeed an agreement regulated by the CCA 1974, and does contain all the prescribed terms as laid out in that Act. A gold star if you can point out on exactly which points Mr Wellinhoff’s assumptions fail. TWO gold stars if you can do it without laughing.

 

Just in case there is any doubt too, as to the intention of the Author of the CCA 1974 when the above section was drafted, I should like to include a quote from the author himself; Francis Bennion, from his excellent website:

“© F A R Bennion Website: Francis Bennion -

Doc. No. 2003.061 JPN008L 167 JPN (2003) 773

Any footnotes are shown at the bottom of each pageConsumer Credit Act 1974 s 127(3)As the draftsman of the Consumer Credit Act 1974 I would like to thank Dr Richard Lawson for his interesting and well-argued article (30 August 2003) on Wilson v First County TrustLtd [2003] UKHL 40, [2003] 4 All ER 97.

Dr Lawson may be interested to know that I included the provision in question (section 127(3)) entirely on my own initiative. It seemed right to me that if the creditor company couldn’t be bothered to ensure that all the prescribed particulars were accurately included in the credit agreement it deserved to find it unenforceable, and that the court should not have power to relieve it from this penalty. Nobody queried this, and it went through Parliament without debate. I’m glad the House of Lords has now vindicated my reasoning and confirmed that nobody’s human rights were infringed.

167 Justice of the Peace (2003) 773.”

 

All done? Good. Now, if you have quite finished, I’ll get back to my breakfast. Otherwise, I’ll see you in court. Which reminds me. Don’t forget to issue your claim in my local court here in Peterhead. I think you’ll find that I’m entitled to defend any possible court action here, rather than wherever Cabot might choose to lodge a claim. I’d hate to think that Cabot would attempt to be sneaky by using Northampton in the hopes that I wouldn’t be able to turn up. But just in case, I’d like to remind you that in that event, I WILL write to the court, pointing out that I have advised you accordingly, and showing this letter in evidence.

 

I look forward to checking your homework.

 

Yours Sincerely,

 

Seahorse

 

Strangely enough, I've not had a reply

[ODC]

Cabot no longer phone me.

 

But my last email to them went something like this... well, EXACTLY like this, to be honest...

 

 

 

Strangely enough, I've not had a reply

 

ROFPMSL:grin:

[The GodMother]

Oh what a polite letter.

 

I feel it is strange that you have not had a reply.

 

Maybe they needed to go to night school for the maths lessons. Any way nice of you to advise them to use the margin for there workings outs.

 

PMSL

[The GodMother]

Probably Jehovas's Witnesses. My Gran waved a carving knife at one through the kitchen window while she was carving the sunday roast. 5 years later and they've not been back.

Like garlic bread, it may be the future.

 

 

 

 

Or like oral sex, the taste of things to come........

 

 

 

Can i please borrow your gran she sounds lovely.

 

I threatend to call the police on the last lot of jehova witnesses as they did not have a appointment.

 

The head of the jehovas came over and said if i want ed to waste police time then it was up to me but i could be arrested for wasting police time.

 

So me being the lovely person i am decided to get smart and say to them well actually your the one that would get arrested because you have knocked on my door and that is breaking the english common law as you dont have my permission. He tried to get smart and said my sister is a magistrate at the local court.

 

I came back with oh thats good for her. I go shooting with a district judge based in norwich and a high court judge as well as a few police men and wemon and they we all donate blood.

 

They soon left have not been back either:(

[The GodMother]

DCAs callers operate in teams of three. One can read, one can write and the third one is there to keep an eye on the two smartasses

 

 

LOL

[fuzzybobble]

My gran is great. 86 this year and she still walks a mile to the village to do her shopping. Goes out dancing twice a week and we both go to the local pub for a few pints of Old Speckled Hen on a friday evening. Then she walks me home and unlocks the door for me, as the keyhole keeps moving around after 10pm on a friday.

 

As for Jehovas Witness's I worked with one for a year. Nice guy, but they do have some seriously weird ideas.

I just ask them "When's the next end of the world prediction going to be then?" They've had about 4 so far and we're all still here.

 

They claim that when the end of the world comes, only the chosen few of them will make it to heaven (which is on mars, I think he said.) If only a few will make it, why go door to door and tell everyone to join them. Keep it secret and you'd get a better chance of being one of the chosen ones. :grin: