Police Confidence...

[snowdragon]

look I came to get sound advice for a friend, a straight answer to a straight question and I always seem to get  stamped on etc, like my face does not fit, sorry if that is harsh. My friend is scared, plain and simple, she knows HE not that keen on her and  never has been, no idea why as she is the kindest person I know.t

I just want her to have something positive to look forward to, she said something innocent in her   eyes but seems it going against  her.

Thanks to all who gave advice, I just         had enough now, SORRY

 

[honeybee13]

I'm sorry you feel like that, Sandy. I think we've all tried our best but clearly we haven't given you the answer you wanted. I hope your friend gets on OK.

 

HB

[dx100uk]

we dont have an crystal ball sadly though i doubt it did come from the police he's probably just guessing to unsettle her.

[snowdragon]

look all I know is she told the Police office something she thought was confidential  and go no further  same as rest she was asked, but seems her daughters partner been told this but not who said anything, if that makes sense.

She is the most generous  person I know and not vindictive, she has a heart of gold and helped them all out a lot, despite him not liking her she always talks to him, surely Police are supposed to keep confidant stuff confidant? I t has nothing really far as aware to do with what has happened

Sandy

[Manxman in exile]

@snowdragon  -  I don't think anybody is criticising either you or your friend.  I think everybody feels sorry for you both.

 

It's a pity you got a couple of replies suggesting the police cannot be trusted.  I'm sure that isn't everybody's experience.

 

I suspect that @dx100uk is right and that this bloke doesn't know anything and is just guessing.

 

I don't want to know any of the details but is it possible for your friend to contact the police and impress upon them the importance that any information given by your friend about this person does not get back to him?  @honeybee13 suggested earlier that your friend could speak to a police family liaison worker or ask a social worker to act as intermediary?

 

Apart from thinking along thoes lines I have no idea what else to suggest.

[snowdragon]

Manxman, thank you, unfortunately  the person does know as Police told him, he just does not know who told the Police..................... yet, 

[Manxman in exile]

I've no doubt he will know - or will suspect - that someone has spoken with the police.

 

But that doesn't mean he'll find out who.

 

Best of luck

[snowdragon]

" UPDATE"

She is waiting to hear back from the Police atm as has contacted them, see what they say

[snowdragon]

reply got back

 

All reports to the police are confidential and the personal data of persons who deal with the police is protected by Data Protection legislation. Personal data includes anything that can identify a person.

 

We would recommend that if your friend has concerns about the use of their information, or is concerned that they may be in danger, they contact the local force they made the report to originally and explain this. They can do so via 101 

[snowdragon]

Hi, my friend has said she  does not think the reply she got really explains anything? She has no phone right now and is in a complete mess and has gone away , no idea why, she so scared and stressed, think she said that  her daughters partner has to  go back Police end month but not sure, I really wish could say to her, " No it will not be disclosed it was you who mentioned his sister "

To me a confidence should not be broken

[snowdragon]

no reply to previous posts but  can anyone tell me when someone makes a statement for court  is it just to do with the facts they saw/heard on day in question or would it include stuff from say, weeks , months, ago, whether told or heard? 

[dx100uk]

what court about what? we dont have a clue whats going on ..........

we dont have a crystal ball ........not are telepathic.........

 

dx

 

[snowdragon]

sent you a PM dx

[Manxman in exile]

18 hours ago, snowdragon said:

no reply to previous posts but  can anyone tell me when someone makes a statement for court  is it just to do with the facts they saw/heard on day in question or would it include stuff from say, weeks , months, ago, whether told or heard? 

 

Sorry - but how has it reached "statement" stage?

Originally you said your friend "was asked by police" about something or someone.  Has she actually made a witness statement for use in court, or has she been asked to make one?

If she's making a formal statement to the police that might be used in court proceedings, it can relate to anything that she directly knows (eg that she saw or heard) about the matter that is before the court.  Although that doesn't necessarily mean it will be admissible in court.

If your friend makes (or has made) a witness statement that ends up being used in court, I'd have thought her identity would become known when it was given in evidence.  I don't know that for a fact but I can't imagine you can give a formal court statement anonymously.

Has your friend followed previous advice to try to speak to a social worker or to a police family liaison officer in order to air her concerns and seek reassurance?  And perhaps ask for protection?

(I understand that you can't go into detail on a public forum - and I don't want to know anyway - but without knowing the background to this it's very difficult to give useful advice.  Good luck to you and your friend)

 

 

[snowdragon]

Manxman this is a different issue

DX pm sent

[snowdragon]

Manxman, can not PM you as you do not seem to have that action?

 

DX have resent PM

[honeybee13]

Sandy, I don't think anyone here is expert on this kind of case. Advice is meant to be on the main forum. 

HB

[snowdragon]

I understand that HB, sorry,  just wanted to PM Manxman and DX asked me to resend a PM

[dx100uk]

team are aware of the txt of the pm

quite honestly as we nor anyone here would ever know who the 3rd party is/was nor guess

imho you can quite safely post it here.

i think this attitude of hiding things is over blown in unnecessary worry by some people in 99% of cases.

this is a forum 

its for everyone to partake in freely as they wish and help as they wish, not be disadvantaged as they are not part of a clan.

pm advise is not allowed.

wanting to pm members with private details in not on and against our rules and disadvantages others.

its not something you need to keep a big secret SD.

 

dx

 

 

[snowdragon]

maybe     I did not want   it posted  as somehow someone knows exactly what I have said, so with that I no longer feel like I belong here, have felt this way some      time, No offence  meant, but I cam here for help and advice on something over my head, It is bad enough I have been told I have cancer, so am very scared right now.

Thanks for help received 

[Manxman in exile]

3 hours ago, snowdragon said:

I understand that HB, sorry,  just wanted to PM Manxman and DX asked me to resend a PM

Unfortunately this forum won't let me send or receive PMs...

[dx100uk]

if you don't want it post, then thats your call, but theres little point in asking a forum for help if you wont tell people what is actually going on and members have to guess.

its none of our business if people have cancer or mental health issues, we have those users here all the time and i can pers tell you are not alone, but these issues shouldn't be used as an excuse for unnecessary worry.

if you want help on an issue you have to give the required info for all the volunteer members to be actually able to help. not talk around corners, we all have our crosses to bear but don't broadcast them.

but from what i make of the situation the persons police statement given, if they gave one, will be read out, no hear say is added..

 

dx