I owe a lot!

[loopy_lou1]

Thank you Geoff. Thank you so much. I did the same. I called Payplan this morning and they had dealt with my two failed IVAs. They're a great company and give such nice and impartial advice. I didn't really know how to go about going bankrupt but I do now. I am going to the Court on Monday to pick up the relevant information and then I can get started. The stigma of bankruptcy is very scary and I know it is with me for life but so is debt, agree? I would be paying this amount off FOREVER unless I win the lottery or a loved one leaves me money which is something I don't even want to think about.

 

I need to do this and so many people on here have been amazing.

 

I just think I needed a shove to do it. I think it's been inevitable for a long time but it took HFO being absolutely unbelieveable with me to get to get it sorted.

 

Thanks x

[tomterm8]

The stigma of bankruptcy is very scary and I know it is with me for life

Thanks x

 

that's hardly true. Although they do publish it in the local paper, no one reads that section except some companies that send spam letters.

 

The bankruptcy will fall off your credit record around 6 years after discharge (so roughly 7 years). There are a few restrictions on the kinds of jobs you can do during bankruptcy, but apart from that - pretty much no one needs to know.

[Tau]

The hardest part for a lot of people, is actually admitting that they have a problem. I know it took me two nearly three years to realise that I would never be able to pay these debts back and in that time I had been working upto a hundred hours a week, missing my kids growing up, being to tired to go out and do anything with them, hardly seeing the wife(some might say thats a bonus:-) ) I just couldnt do it any more. I used to go days with not seeing the family unless they were asleep, I would come in at night to say bye to the wife as she went to work and say morning when she came home as I was going out.

When the business went pear shaped that was when we decided to go BR. It was the best thing we could have done, I only work forty hours a week now and am usually home by five at the very latest. Money is not great, but we get by and sometimes have a little bit over at the end of the month.

You will be surprised at what you can claim as living expenses with the OR.

If you would like a chat about what to expect, let me know and I will pm you my number.

 

Stay strong and focus on the future.

 

Geoff.

[loopy_lou1]

The difference between you and me Geoff is you had a family to consider which is much much worse. I have to consider my parents in this but it's not like I have children or a boyfriend/husband. I am solely to blame for this - being flighty and extravagant and buying expensive sunglasses. I am beating myself up over that but then again - that's 160 quid out of thousands which I tried and tried to consolidate. I consolidated once after buying my first car and then I had a reduction in my hours at this point it was only a couple of grand, then I got good credit for keeping up with my payments and was offered a credit card and then I ran that up and consolidated again - and again - and AGAIN!

 

My debt is solely due to living beyond my means. No business to fold, no house - one thing that makes me feel vile is that I've brought this on myself by trying to be clever and throwing money around that I didn't have.

 

I just hope the court will petition my bankruptcy because this is all me. No one else.

 

I did move away for a year from my hometown and that's when my debt increased by about 10k.

 

I can't see another way to get rid of the debt other than bankruptcy but I know one thing. I've learnt how to resist more now.

 

I've even had to do it in the past four months because I was out of work I used my current credit card which will now be included in my debt because I was unemployed Jun - Sept.

 

Silly silly girl!!!!

[tomterm8]

I just hope the court will petition my bankruptcy because this is all me. No one else.

 

i think you'll find that they won't refuse to make you bankrupt on those grounds.:o

[loopy_lou1]

Cheers TT!

 

Big kiss for you

 

Whenever I get negative you pick me up!

 

I just read an aritcle that irresponsible lenders are come down on harder than people who are victims of circumstance.

[loopy_lou1]

As I said to you too - I haven't been paying these DCAs regularly so the court will ask where the money has gone and honestly it's gone on living! Just day to day living and I had two weekends away - all year!

[Tau]

Hey Lorna,

Stop beating yourself to a pulp, whats done is done. We all make mistakes at some point in our lives and we learn to deal with them.

Ok you might have spent to much, but at the time you may have been able to afford the repayments. Things change in time and circumstances change, also bear in mind that it is not all your fault. No really its not, if the banks etc had said no to all your consolidation loans or refused you a new credit card every time you applied, would things have been different. I bet they would.

 

Will I ever have anther credit card, not effin likely, they cost me too much. Not just financially but for all the heartache and agro they bring.

 

I can understand how your dad would react, he's probably just like mine. If you aint got the money, dont buy it, thats there way of life. But when temptation is dangled in front of you, its hard to say no.

 

So anyway, as I said its all water under the bridge now, so you need to concentrate on the future. I know, easier said than done, but you are on the homeward leg now and the light at the end of the tunnel is shining brighter now..

 

Time for a hug now I think......

 

 

Geoff

 

PS

I hope that all made sense.

[Tau]

As I said to you too - I haven't been paying these DCAs regularly so the court will ask where the money has gone and honestly it's gone on living! Just day to day living and I had two weekends away - all year!

 

The court wont ask you what you spent the money on, they will just look at how much you owe and how much you earn and very quickly do the maths.

 

The OR may ask you, but just be truthfull with them and you wont have a problem. They are there to help you as much as your creditors.

 

 

 

Geoff.

[loopy_lou1]

 

So anyway, as I said its all water under the bridge now, so you need to concentrate on the future. I know, easier said than done, but you are on the homeward leg now and the light at the end of the tunnel is shining brighter now..

 

Time for a hug now I think......

 

 

Geoff

 

PS

I hope that all made sense.

 

It made PERFECT sense and thank you. It's taken me about 2-3 years to admit I have a problem - I can see - and I know I keep referencing this - how gamblers and alcoholics and drug addicts feel to an extent. Like admitting it is the road to recovery. I am scared SH*TLESS about my dad finding out and I am looking for a new job at the moment. I will not be working in government or with a sole repsonsibility to a company so I should be ok. My profession is clerical/admin/sales so I don't think my BR would be a factor.

My dad is nearly 60, very old school, works like a dog and his bark is worse than his bite but as you can understand I don't want to disappoint him. I already have by putting on weight and being penniless - this would be the last straw!

 

I might tell him afterwards and sit him down and explain it but until then - the less he knows the better.

 

Hey Geoff - I really, really ENJOYED THAT HUG SWEETHEART - I needed it

 

You're very sweet

[Tau]

Aw shucks, Im blushing now :oops:

[Hippy-chick]

My dad is nearly 60, very old school, works like a dog and his bark is worse than his bite but as you can understand I don't want to disappoint him. I already have by putting on weight and being penniless - this would be the last straw!

 

I might tell him afterwards and sit him down and explain it but until then - the less he knows the better.

 

 

Lou

 

I so understand. My dad was likewise (age and attitude) when I went through my money troubles. 10 years on I'm through it (other than a few minor blips), and he knows all about it. In fact, once I had started sorting things out I told him - so I really appreciate why you want to take control before you let him know anything.

 

Best thing was, when I told him he went very quiet and listened. Now he tells me that he's proud of me for taking control and fighting back.

 

So good luck lass. Listen to all the advice here - then go about it your own way. Even if those who offer advice do not agree with the path you decide, they will still support you every step of the way.

 

Big hug from me now, and whenever you need it - you only have to ask.

 

xx

[loopy_lou1]

I actually told my dad about HFO last night. I didn't tell him everything because he doesn't need any more hassle. He's had a tough month. He works 7 days a week and is basically a workaholic but he has to be with the overheads we have.

He told me that if they phone he'll "burn them! - hahahaha" and also to f**k off. I explained that Manchester (me moving away) had ruined me but he said "And what do you have to pay out? If it wasn't for me you'd be in jail" little does he know.

The conversation ended with him saying "I don't want to know" - which is fine by me but even telling him that one debt has eased some of my pressure. I felt triumphant afterwards and instead of staying up into the early hours this morning I went to sleep. Granted I woke up a couple of times because my body clock is out of sync but WOW a small thing like that can make me feel a lot better.

 

"Hippy Chick" - thanks honey. My decision for BR has been a hard one to make. I don't have a regular job and I have failed two IVAs so that's no longer an option. I can't promise money to a debt management company because I don't know how long this job will last so this is MY PERSONAL best option.

 

I've thought about the repercussions - I buy a lot of things online and without a debit card I don't think I will be able to now. It's upsetting and restrictive but a small price to pay for aforesaid "financial freedom" - which I think there is no such thing as everyone has something to pay in life.

 

And Geoff - you've been great - the people here make you feel less like a leper for being stupid, I am very grateful. I feel I should just say thanks to everyone because without you I wouldn't have had the courage to stand up and say this is my problem and now I need to deal with it.

[tomterm8]

 

I've thought about the repercussions - I buy a lot of things online and without a debit card I don't think I will be able to now. It's upsetting and restrictive but a small price to pay for aforesaid "financial freedom" - which I think there is no such thing as everyone has something to pay in life.

 

As I understand it, a lot of basic bank accounts offer debit cards like electron which operate without any credit, and which you are able to have even during bankruptcy. There are also some charge cards that look like credit cards, although they are quite expesnive.

 

And Geoff - you've been great - the people here make you feel less like a leper for being stupid, I am very grateful. I feel I should just say thanks to everyone because without you I wouldn't have had the courage to stand up and say this is my problem and now I need to deal with it.

..

[Tau]

Morning Lorna.

Glad to hear that you had a fairly good nights sleep last night. Sharing a problem certainly helps things along.

 

Regarding the bank account, the Co-oP offer an Visa electron card with the basic bank account. As Tomterm8 says it works just like a debit card and is accepted at all the big stores and petrol stations. I would avoid the pre pay credit cards as they are expensive to use.

 

Yep you are right, the folk on this site are fantastic. They freely give up their time to help people out of a hole. It may take some time to see results and a lot of heartache, but in the end it is all worthwhile.

I know in your situation you wanted a "quick fix" so the CCA route was really a non starter and I understand all of the reasons why.

Bankruptcy is not a route to be taken lightly, but in your situation I think you have made the right decision. At this moment in time you have nothing to loose.

 

If you need any help with the paperwork, there will be people that can help you here.

 

Once you leave the court, you will feel like a great weight has een lifted off of your shoulders and will start to walk tall again. You will be debt starting a new life, debt free.

 

When you go and pick up the pack from the court, ask them for details about not paying the £150 court fees. This is available if you are on a low income I believe, also ask how long the waiting list is for a court date. You can book it in advance. We had to wait two weeks for ours.

 

When you arrive for your hearing, you will see the Bankruptcy clerk first, he/she will go through all the paperwork with you(there is shedloads of this ) They will then relieve you of the cash for the hearing and you will also need to swear an oath, this doesnt cost anything at the court.

The clerk will then go to see the judge and you will be called in to chambers, the judge will take a look through your papers and may ask a question of two. He/She will then sign the papers, You now are bankrupt.

 

When you leave the Judge the clerk will ask you to wait while they copy all the documents and fax them over to the Official receiver, who will then call the court to speak to you. They will ask a couple of questions and may ask to call you back in a couple of hours to carry on the interveiw. They may also want to speak to you in person at their office.

Dont worry this is all perfectly normal and happens to everyone.

 

It is worthwhile sorting out all of your bank/credit card statments for the last year, they may want to see them. If you dont have them, dont worry they can get them from the creditors.

 

Well that will do for now, if you need to know any thing else, please ask.

 

 

 

 

Geoff.

[loopy_lou1]

Morning Lorna.

I would avoid the pre pay credit cards as they are expensive to use.

 

I actually have found that my online shopping works out cheaper on certain items. I just wanted to know that the option is there if you needed to buy tickets or something. I'm trying to cover everything to make life seem as normal as possible.

 

Yep you are right, the folk on this site are fantastic. They freely give up their time to help people out of a hole. It may take some time to see results and a lot of heartache, but in the end it is all worthwhile.

They are amazing here you're right. I do see my situation as a silly girl and not a victim of circumstance and I don't think that self-blame is going anywhere soon. It shows that I was weak and had no willpower to say no. Then again I didn't know the repercussions of credit at that point.

I know in your situation you wanted a "quick fix" so the CCA route was really a non starter and I understand all of the reasons why.

 

I didn't want a quick fix, really.

But my debt would have gone on for the rest of my life with nothing to show at the end of it.

I'm still worried about my chances of a mortgage - which are probably slim to none now.

 

Bankruptcy is not a route to be taken lightly, but in your situation I think you have made the right decision. At this moment in time you have nothing to loose.

 

It's taken at least 5 years to admit there's something seriously wrong.

I think I feel more relaxed now because I can see and end - whereas before I couldn't.

If you need any help with the paperwork, there will be people that can help you here.

 

Once you leave the court, you will feel like a great weight has een lifted off of your shoulders and will start to walk tall again. You will be debt starting a new life, debt free.

 

When you go and pick up the pack from the court, ask them for details about not paying the £150 court fees. This is available if you are on a low income I believe, also ask how long the waiting list is for a court date. You can book it in advance. We had to wait two weeks for ours.

 

When you arrive for your hearing, you will see the Bankruptcy clerk first, he/she will go through all the paperwork with you(there is shedloads of this ) They will then relieve you of the cash for the hearing and you will also need to swear an oath, this doesnt cost anything at the court.

The clerk will then go to see the judge and you will be called in to chambers, the judge will take a look through your papers and may ask a question of two. He/She will then sign the papers, You now are bankrupt.

 

When you leave the Judge the clerk will ask you to wait while they copy all the documents and fax them over to the Official receiver, who will then call the court to speak to you. They will ask a couple of questions and may ask to call you back in a couple of hours to carry on the interveiw. They may also want to speak to you in person at their office.

Dont worry this is all perfectly normal and happens to everyone.

 

It is worthwhile sorting out all of your bank/credit card statments for the last year, they may want to see them. If you dont have them, dont worry they can get them from the creditors.

 

Well that will do for now, if you need to know any thing else, please ask.

 

Can't say I am looking forward to it but I am not dreading it like I was. It has to be done. Then I can start my life. Not start again - actually start - my debt started at 21 and I am now 33 - I haven't lived!

 

 

Geoff.

 

Thank you for everything - you're brilliant x

[sequenci]

Lou.

 

The exemption from the court fee form is called EX160, you can check it out here:

 

http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/courtfinder/forms/ex160_e1007.pdf

 

A bit more info here:

 

http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/courtfinder/forms/ex160a_e1007.pdf

 

You might be able to seek some financial assistance with the OR deposit. The associaition of charity officers might be able to source some funding for you, call them on 01707 651 777. Some utilities firms have trust funds which may be able to help too, who do you get your gas/elec/water through?

[loopy_lou1]

OMG thank you - I don't pay bills. I live at home with my parents.

 

More help!?????

 

You're like my guardian angels.

[shane5408]

Hi Lorna,

 

Just picked up your PM, for what it's worth i think you're making the right decision and I wish you the best of luck with it. I just wanted to echo tomterms advice, the MSE site is fantastic for bankruptcy support.

 

kind regards,

Shane

[tomterm8]

Lou.

 

The exemption from the court fee form is called EX160, you can check it out here:

 

http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/courtfinder/forms/ex160_e1007.pdf

 

A bit more info here:

 

http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/courtfinder/forms/ex160a_e1007.pdf

 

You might be able to seek some financial assistance with the OR deposit. The associaition of charity officers might be able to source some funding for you, call them on 01707 651 777. Some utilities firms have trust funds which may be able to help too, who do you get your gas/elec/water through?

 

I know this is an unusual piece of advice, but if that doesn't work, as someone whose mother is a church organist, I know that local churches often have discrete stashes of money left over from various old charities, and sometimes help out local residents in need.

 

I also know some people have put their bankruptcy on their credit card:o That's possibly not the best thing to do, however.

[sequenci]

I also know some people have put their bankruptcy on their credit card:o That's possibly not the best thing to do, however.

 

It happens more often than you could ever imagine, needs must and all that.

[loopy_lou1]

Aww Shane - my hero!

First person to come to my aid.

Thank you so much.

MSE is down for overdemand at the moment - AHEM! hahahaha

I can't wait to take the long road home now. No more letters, no more calls, money left at the end of the month, saving, getting fit and then you never know I'll be back here in 6-12 months time telling all of you I've found the love of my life and not a BR!

 

I really am elated that I got that call. I needed it - well, one of several. It was only last weekend and it feels like it happened weeks ago.

 

Thank you HFO for being complete and utter b**tards and making me open my eyes you sh*ts!

 

I can warn other people now. I want to go through this experience with all of you so I can help other people. And I know I will need all your support.

 

 

Kisses and Hugs

 

Lorna x

[tomterm8]

Aww Shane - my hero!

MSE is down for overdemand at the moment - AHEM! hahahaha

Lorna x

 

I think you'll find Martin Lewis decided to go on TV / Radio and say people could make thousands from PPI claims yesterday. Hence, no site today. Madness:-D

[shane5408]

Congrats on turning pink Tomterm, not to sure about the new avatar though:D

[tomterm8]

Congrats on turning pink Tomterm, not to sure about the new avatar though:D

 

Thanks. See http://www.consumeractiongroup.co.uk/forum/bear-garden/118244-what-ect-do-about.html