I am very ashamed, I have been very stupid and don't know what possessed me.

I feel sick and scared, can't eat.

This is the first time I have ever done any thing like this,

it is not me, so I am very ashamed.

I'm 50 female and worked part time .

Been working there nearly 2 yrs.

I was called into an investigation meeting at work ( i work in a large retail chain) and then a few days later a disciplinary meeting.

At the first meeting

Firstly,

I have been accused of buying online from our store with my discount and then returning without making sure the discount had been taken off.

This has happen numerous times, I didn't notice the discount hadn't been deducted.

Sometimes it is sometimes it isn't.

I stupidly assumed that it is the person behind tills responsibility to press the button.

(I work there so they know I'm an employee ) but apparently it's my responsibility.

I didn't realise

they have examples going back a year, mainly in the last few months,

I had pointed out a couple of times that they need to press button, when I was just bringing one thing back.

Usually I am returning number of items, busy getting sorted to check button is pressed.

Secondly, I should return to card paid with but often forget my credit card so use my debit card

(also used to have 3 months to return so credit card would have already been paid).

Thirdly, I had some items that were past their return date and I got my husband to bring them in to me for return (no one knows my husband) which I nervously did as I knew I shouldn't serve my husband. ( he was not happy doing it)

stupidly used my debit card, and used a false name and address.

the thing I am most ashamed of,

i realised I had returned something to my husband at the reduced price rather than price I paid,

got it in my head that I needed the difference ( god knows why)

did a suspended transaction so that I could take it to the till at my break,

for some reason I had a gift card in my pocket for use with customers

I loaded the amount onto the gift card for me! (£20) not even worth it.

As I said I don't know why I did it, what possessed me.

All so very stupid, but done now so can't change.

I said I would pay back what I had got in error as not my intention.

in the investigation meeting I explained my reasoning for the first 3 things,

said I couldn't remember the final thing

- when I was asked about the transaction.

I got suspended unsurprisingly.

I didn't sleep at all, all I could think was 'that they knew'.

I was called back in the next day and asked to clarify a few things including the refund,

I broke down and admitted it was for me, and didn't say yesterday as ashamed.

I was told they would be in touch.

I left and went and got replacement gift card from another shop and in an enveloped dropped it in addressed to investigating manager.

I know it doesn't put it right.

Few days later I received letter inviting me to disciplinary meeting.

I went, I could have taken someone but was too ashamed.

Haven't even told my husband about gift card.

At the meeting I said how ashamed and sorry I was, how it wasn't my intention to abuse my position.

Said I had stress at home, but no excuse.

Had already submitted my resignation, (but have to give 2 weeks notice )

He said he had to go through process and ask questions.

He wanted factual reasons that I couldn't give ,

asked if had any mitigating circumstances ,

i didn't even know what that was.

Then he and note taker left room for 30 minutes.

I asked several times if I could leave and he said no they had to go through process.

When they came back he listed what I was accused of .

Then said they would accept my resignation with immediate effect, which I wrote there and then. He ended the meeting.

Then said "off the record" - I had said I would repay what taken, if I work out what I owe back, (central protection can go back 18 months)

then they may take that into account when/if they contact police.

I said I didn't have copy of receipts but I could do what I could

- looking at my bank /credit card ins and outs and orders placed.

I just want to die at the moment, i have been so stupid. I am so ashamed of my actions .

I now can't sleep or eat with fear that the police are going to come knocking at my door.

I have spent two days going through my accounts and worked out in the last 8 months that there have been about £550 ( mostly in the last couple of months with sale stuff and handbags )

I haven't a clue about 18 months ago but I've spent more on clothes and shoes and bags lately and there have been a lot of new staff in last few months .

I am going to write to them offering a payment of what I have calculated I owe and apologise for my actions .

I am so humiliated . I don't know who I can talk to. There's not even a CAB I can call in my area.

best thing is to be totally honest

it looks to me that it might be worthy to go see your GP

everything doesn't seem right at present with you and for a while

if you get my meaning.

please comeback if you get any silly letters from an outfit called RLP or DWF

DO NOT RESPOND to them till we see the letters.

when was the last meeting or contact from your ex employer [date]

The first step to recovery is realising you have a problem. Its also the hardest step and you've already taken it.

As suggested the 1st step would be your doctor.

best thing is to be totally honest

it looks to me that it might be worthy to go see your GP

everything doesn't seem right at present with you and for a while

if you get my meaning.

 

 

please comeback if you get any silly letters from an outfit called RLP or DWF

DO NOT RESPOND to them till we see the letters.

 

 

when was the last meeting or contact from your ex employer [date]

Monday 31st - I've spent numerous hours going through all orders. I'm going to see Dr today . Thanks for advice

thanks for advice.

i went to dr today and suffering from chronic stress and depression and have been for some time, now have medication, so hopefully i might get some sleep tonight.

i also sent a repayment figure to my employer, and mentioned visit to Dr.

i know it doesn't excuse what i have done, but hopefully they will see that i am trying to make amends.

Well done