Sister abandoned home - leaving massive debts - what next?

[stuarto]

Hello everyone.

 

I have a family situation on-going and without going into too much detail,

 

my sister has left her home and 5 children (been gone a month now).

 

After visiting the house and taking away piles of unanswered post that were hidden, my family have uncovered debts of approx 20k.

 

These consist of utility bills, council tax, phone & broadband bills, nursery bills, and many, many PAY DAY loans.

 

The family home is a housing association property and a 'notice to quit' has been issued.

 

The three youngest children are with their respective Father's and the eldest has found accommodation.

 

The only person remaining at the house is my 18 year old nephew who we are currently helping to find a home.

 

My question is should we IGNORE the letters regarding the debts OR contact every single one of them explaining the situation? (contacting them would be my normal response to getting into difficulties) but we are not sure by contacting them all if this would open a 'can of worms' - ie. could anyone else become liable for my sisters debts?

 

Only her name appears on the letters, invoices, etc.

 

Thanks for any comments/advice received.

 

Stuart.

[renegadeimp]

If she isnt there, i would ignore them. Or if they try to contact again, simply send them a gone away notice. The creditors should enter this into her credit record and any other creditor searching it would see it.

 

Just remember, you have NO legal right to admin her debts unless she gives you authorisation. None of the creditors would entertain you either unless they had authorisation, as they would be in breach of their credit licence or DPA.

 

The only thing you can do is give them an update that she is no longer there, but imo you should just ignore the debts.

[stuarto]

Thanks for that reply.

 

I think we will take your advice and ignore.

 

she will never be in a position to repay any of it so if they only have her to 'chase' and no way of finding her then these debts will have to be written off. But like you say her credit record will be updated accordingly.

 

Thanks again.

Stuart.

[citizenB]

there is no way that anyone else would be made responsible for your Sister's debts as long as they are in her name only.

 

This is a very sad situation - is there any reason to be concerned about your Sister's mental well being ?

 

I will try and find some one who can advise.

[stuarto]

Thanks citizenB.

 

Yes there is reason to worry. . . one word . . .Cocaine.

 

Our family are in deep shock and my elderly mother is suffering the most.

 

The eldest children knew about it but were scared to tell anyone.

 

I feel so sorry for her children, aged 3, 8, 10, 18 and 21.

 

Our initial thoughts were she was in the process of a breakdown after splitting up with her partner, we seem to have lost her now though.

 

Thanks again for your reply.

Stuart.

[citizenB]

Ouch, very sorry to hear this. It must indeed be a worry, however I don't think you need have any concern about family being pursued for these debts.

 

I have asked for more advice from others on the Site team.

[stuarto]

Thank you.

 

The debts question is obviously not the highest priority, just wanted to clarify if possible and put my Mother's mind at rest regarding that problem.

 

Finding a home for my nephew is in progress.

 

The other children are settling in with their father's families.

 

Finding a way to get our sister home is the next thing . . . but reading everything about her condition tells me that could be a long, upsetting and difficult task.

 

Stuart.

[renegadeimp]

It will be a very long road, but there are a LOT of charities and even hospital centres that can help her. The main issue is the withdrawal period. Help her get through that and it is much easier.

[dx100uk]

just to be sure here

 

none of the children are over 18 and she did not have a partner?

 

the things like CTAX/REnt /utils could get nasty if there was.

 

the main priority here is the welfare of the kids

 

they must have suffered badly but are hiding it well.

 

dx

[stuarto]

Thanks for replying.

 

She did have a partner... didnt 'officially" live with her.

 

He was the moron who introduced her to the drugs.

 

My nephew who is looking for somewhere to live diring the 'notice to quit' period is over 18.

 

Gettingy sister to admit shes using and asking for help is the big hurdle.

 

Shes currently clubbing and sleeping wherever she can find refuge in London. And delusional to the point of thinking she's a music promoter.

 

She's a 37 year old grandmother with five kids.

 

The addiction had taken over and she now considers her family and friends to be 'negative' and 'haters'.

 

Very sad and frightening not knowing where she is every single night.

[stuarto]

... and it seems the younger kids are coping better than the two older ones

 

My nephew doted on his mum and is shattered by this.

 

His father wad useless and now this - very sad.

[dx100uk]

cant imagine the heartache you are suffering even though I have firsthand exp of almost the same situation years ago with a work colleague.

 

the partner will prob be liable then too for the CTAX and poss rent/gas/elec

 

prob benefit fraud too [not saying all that take drugs get benefits - not sure]

 

i'm not sure on the older child 'adult'

 

so i'll let the more exp posters answer that.

 

hope it resolves itself.