Is this the end of the line for disability benefits?

[Nystagmite]

Tests prove nothing. I've had various tests done that say I've got x, y and z. These don't prove care and /or mobility needs.

[SueP1944]

Tests prove nothing. I've had various tests done that say I've got x, y and z. These don't prove care and /or mobility needs.

 

Thankyou. That is how I was thinking. So apart from the DWP not accepting our statements on the application forms (which I can fully understand why), the 'evidence' of the conditions meaning absolutely nothing, and not having any history or knowledge logged by the GP or the Consultants, where or who else do we turn to?

 

Yes I know that apparently some people moan to their GP's and we don't, this can't be fair?

 

Besides which and even if we did decide to talk to the GP now, now on earth on we going to cover the ground of the past 7 years at least, when we have needed help but decided to go it alone? Neither of us is able to recount what has happened over 7 years, 1 week is bad enough!

 

There must be something that we are missing and haven't thought of that could help us.

 

We are both genuine people and like a lot of our age, either don't want to bother our GP too much, or just want to keep our lives private.

 

Or is it simply that if we don't complain and moan to our GP, we just don't get anywhere.

 

If that is the case I can see the opposite happening. Those that are maybe just a little disabled, provided that they make regular appointments with the GP and have every little thing logged in, they are the ones that are successful in their claims. Those that are badly disabled who don't 'open up' lose out! I think that that is very unfair.

[Nystagmite]

This is your own fault, imo. You chose (or choose) not to see anyone and then moan when you can't get DLA.

[SueP1944]

This is your own fault, imo. You chose (or choose) not to see anyone and then moan when you can't get DLA.

 

Oh thank you! there is no need to be so rude.

 

I thought this forum was here to help people solve a problem not criticise them.

 

I know why we are turned down every time, what we are looking for is maybe another way of proving to the DWP that we both have genuine needs. We can't undo what we haven't done for the past 7 years, but I know that from now on we could start to build up a history. If at all possible we would not want to do that. Why should we be forced into doing something we don't see as being right, thinking that there must be another way out of this problem. Besides what has happened has happened. The DWP would probably see it that there has been nothing wrong with us up until now.

 

Are you seriously saying that because of no history, we should not get any help? What has this country turned into?

God forbid if anything happened to either of us because of our needs for care and mobility not being addressed, the death certificate would read - they didn't do what they should have done to get help so they deserve to die?

That's no different than the old lady that died in a house fire because no one knew or bothered to find out if she was actually able to live on her own having needs for constant care but not telling anybody.

What a caring society this is!

 

I think that this needs to be mentioned to our MP. You just can't have old people not getting the help they so desperately need just because they choose not to tell their GP how difficult life has become.

Edited March 13, 2011 by SueP1944

[SueP1944]

Tests prove nothing. I've had various tests done that say I've got x, y and z. These don't prove care and /or mobility needs.

 

So in your opinion, what does prove care and mobility needs? Surely not your GP who in reality does nothing more than repeat to the DWP what you tell him!!

[leemack]

Unfortunately the DWP do not infer much from diagnoses, as there can be much variability on how an illness can affect different people's care and mobility needs. As such, because there are some dishonest people who exagerate their conditions, they are unable in most cases to just take someone's word on it that their problems are as described. Unfortunately, yes, it means that honest people who don't like to make a fuss do have problems confirming their issues. Really its a choice of deciding which is more important to you - not discussing your care and mobility issues with the gp, or getting awarded dla/aa. I have come across this issue with claimants, particularly older claimants, many times before. In reality your doctor should be aware of care and mobility issues you have, as it can enable more effective treatment and referral to appropriate services, for instance clients I have had have been reffered to occupational therapy, physiotherapy, counselling services, and other specialists because they finally discussed the problems they were having with their gp (prompted by a dla/aa claim).

 

So you need to make your choice. And yes the doctor is just telling the DWP what you told him, but from the perspective of knowing your health problems. So for example, a doctor might know a person has arthritis in a few joints, but may not know that this has spread to other joints and worsened causing severe mobility and care issues, if the patient has just been 'getting on with things and not complaining'. If that person puts in a claim for dla, the doctor will write on the dwp enquiry form, arthritis, and no known problems with mobility and care. If the patient had reported the deterioration in condition, not only might their claim be succesful, but their doctor then refers them to a specialist and occupational therapist.

 

So can you see, these things are important for a doctor to know, regardless of whether you're making a claim. But I would suggest that you ask the DWP for a copy of your claim form and doctor's report so you can see for yourself what was written.

[SueP1944]

Unfortunately the DWP do not infer much from diagnoses, as there can be much variability on how an illness can affect different people's care and mobility needs. As such, because there are some dishonest people who exagerate their conditions, they are unable in most cases to just take someone's word on it that their problems are as described. Unfortunately, yes, it means that honest people who don't like to make a fuss do have problems confirming their issues. Really its a choice of deciding which is more important to you - not discussing your care and mobility issues with the gp, or getting awarded dla/aa. I have come across this issue with claimants, particularly older claimants, many times before. In reality your doctor should be aware of care and mobility issues you have, as it can enable more effective treatment and referral to appropriate services, for instance clients I have had have been reffered to occupational therapy, physiotherapy, counselling services, and other specialists because they finally discussed the problems they were having with their gp (prompted by a dla/aa claim).

 

So you need to make your choice. And yes the doctor is just telling the DWP what you told him, but from the perspective of knowing your health problems. So for example, a doctor might know a person has arthritis in a few joints, but may not know that this has spread to other joints and worsened causing severe mobility and care issues, if the patient has just been 'getting on with things and not complaining'. If that person puts in a claim for dla, the doctor will write on the dwp enquiry form, arthritis, and no known problems with mobility and care. If the patient had reported the deterioration in condition, not only might their claim be succesful, but their doctor then refers them to a specialist and occupational therapist.

 

So can you see, these things are important for a doctor to know, regardless of whether you're making a claim. But I would suggest that you ask the DWP for a copy of your claim form and doctor's report so you can see for yourself what was written.

 

Thankyou for putting it so clearly.

 

In my case you are right, that is exactly what the GP put on the from to the DWP 12 months ago for my first AA claim that was also turned down.

I can see where you are coming from, but it has got so bad now that I don't think there is any chance of bridging that gap with the GP. It's gone on for too long. There is no trust or faith now. We have never been able to feel that we could approach the GP since we joined in 1998. We have just gone through the motions of being ill, getting medication and not going again until the next bout of illness. My husband goes to A&E instead of the GP!! He will do anything to avoid seeing the GP. As I have said earlier, he is as bad with his consultants, the less he says, the more he tells them what they want to hear means he gets out of going into hospital and out of the door home!

 

We feel so let down that we are now seriously contemplating telling the GP where to go and not bothering to register with any. It can't be any worse than what it is now.

 

As regards not being able to get any benefits for our disabilities, we can accept that. We may not like it, but like everything in life - you can't have everything can you?

Edited March 13, 2011 by SueP1944

[bluedogx]

It's very sad that your relationship with your GP has ended up like this. Is there another practice you could register with?

In my area CAB has a benefit specialist who does appeals with clients. He tells them exactly what they need and then they ask their doctors, nurses, social workers etc.

 

Surely there's someone like that in your area? Maybe the local job centre plus would know? We get referrals from them regularly.

[SueP1944]

It's very sad that your relationship with your GP has ended up like this. Is there another practice you could register with?

In my area CAB has a benefit specialist who does appeals with clients. He tells them exactly what they need and then they ask their doctors, nurses, social workers etc.

 

Surely there's someone like that in your area? Maybe the local job centre plus would know? We get referrals from them regularly.

 

 

Thankyou,

 

No there isn't. The nearest town is about 10 miles away and getting there is difficult. We live in a small village, and the GP practice covers quite a large area of countryside.

It is easier to get to the hospital/walk in centre than to get to another GP surgery.

 

I had DIAL help with my AA applications and my husband had the CAB help him. I have already spoken to the CAB before and due to the financial cuts, they are not accepting any more cases that come in off the street. The only way now that CAB will help with appeals etc is if you are eligible for Legal Aid, which we are not.

DIAL are not geared up to dealing with appeals, what staff they have have enough to deal with in the office only.

Why didn't the CAB or DIAL tell us that medical evidence would be required? We could have then stopped the applications going any further.

 

It's not really a 'money thing' that we both claimed these benefits for, although the little bit extra would have come in handy. It was more a recognition by the government that we both need help with looking after each other and as for my husband, the ability to get out and about a little more. But like everything else, there is so much mistrust where benefits are concerned that everybody now is made to pay the price because of the few that have abused it.

 

We accept that we are in this position now, but can't accept that our GP could or would not support us. All he needed to have done was telephone us when he received the request for a report and invite us in for a chat. Maybe then the bridges could have been repaired. But to ignore us and tell the DWP that he was not aware of any problems was too much.

For someone to take the time and trouble to fill out those forms should have made him think that something was not right. His records indicated no problems, yet we are saying that we do have them!

 

I will give the Jobcentre a call tomorrow as you have suggested.

 

This country has gone the way I said and knew it would years ago.

Edited March 13, 2011 by SueP1944

[jadeybags]

Oh thank you! there is no need to be so rude.

 

 

I think that this needs to be mentioned to our MP. You just can't have old people not getting the help they so desperately need just because they choose not to tell their GP how difficult life has become.

 

I think people that genuinely have a struggle with illnesses tend to visit their doctor a fair bit. You have put across earlier in the thread that you help each other out, & you even do your neihgbours shopping.

Maybe these things indicate you dont need these benefits. Just because people are elderly, doesn't mean they dont try pulling a fast one. Just look at Mr dancer that was caught on film on the dancefloor, who apparantly struggled to walk.

But I do think it's all gone a bit too far with the stopping of peoples DLA etc, but I guess they needed to toughen up.

What is annoying is when people fake depression & still get incap. And haven't had any kind of medical for 2 years now. When is that going to stop, because that one person I know of alone is still going along merrily getting it. With no sign of it stopping yet.

[honeybee13]

We accept that we are in this position now, but can't accept that our GP could or would not support us. All he needed to have done was telephone us when he received the request for a report and invite us in for a chat. Maybe then the bridges could have been repaired. But to ignore us and tell the DWP that he was not aware of any problems was too much.

 

Sue, I apologise if I've missed something, because you've made a lot of posts. These things can be self-fulfilling, I know. I'm sorry to say that equally, you could have told the GP that the forms were coming and discussed why you were claiming, because communication is a two-way thing.

 

I apologise for asking, but is your crusade against your GP surgery connected with the failure of this claim?

 

My best, HB

[sj01]

Tests prove nothing. I've had various tests done that say I've got x, y and z. These don't prove care and /or mobility needs.

 

Of course they mean something, how else would the doctors know what was wrong with you?

I have had tests, scans etc and because of them I passed my ESA tribunal.

[SueP1944]

I think people that genuinely have a struggle with illnesses tend to visit their doctor a fair bit. You have put across earlier in the thread that you help each other out, & you even do your neihgbours shopping.

Maybe these things indicate you dont need these benefits. Just because people are elderly, doesn't mean they dont try pulling a fast one. Just look at Mr dancer that was caught on film on the dancefloor, who apparantly struggled to walk.

But I do think it's all gone a bit too far with the stopping of peoples DLA etc, but I guess they needed to toughen up.

What is annoying is when people fake depression & still get incap. And haven't had any kind of medical for 2 years now. When is that going to stop, because that one person I know of alone is still going along merrily getting it. With no sign of it stopping yet.

 

Yes we try to help other people. And as for saying that we maybe 'benefit cheats' is something that I will not accept.

As for most people visiting their GP's when they are ill, some do some don't. If you have the medication you need, there is no need to see anybody, unless you are a sort of person that moans and groans about everything in life.

Yes there are cheats but there are also a lot of ordinary people like us that don't manage to get what we think we should be entitled to.

My husband didn't ask about a DLA claim at the CAB, he went there for something totally unrelated - Pension Credit. After talking to the Benefit Advisor it was her that said that he should be entitled to more than the Lower Rate Mobility which he gets for not being able to go out a great deal and needing help in going out. It was her that orgainsed the foms that came to the house. My husband had no idea that he might be entitled to more, he never raised the question.

And if my husband had have been told that the DWP would want a report from the GP, he would have stopped the claim there and then and told the lady that a report would not be possible as the GP has no idea what his life was about.

 

He currently receives ESA and is in the Support Group, due to his medical conditon.

[SueP1944]

We accept that we are in this position now, but can't accept that our GP could or would not support us. All he needed to have done was telephone us when he received the request for a report and invite us in for a chat. Maybe then the bridges could have been repaired. But to ignore us and tell the DWP that he was not aware of any problems was too much.

 

Sue, I apologise if I've missed something, because you've made a lot of posts. These things can be self-fulfilling, I know. I'm sorry to say that equally, you could have told the GP that the forms were coming and discussed why you were claiming, because communication is a two-way thing.

 

I apologise for asking, but is your crusade against your GP surgery connected with the failure of this claim?

 

My best, HB

 

Thankyou

 

That is all right I am getting confused myself trying to answer so many questions on various topics. And then there are those that are simply rude and critical.

As I have mentioned above, my husband never knew or was told by the CAB that the DWP would be asking for a report from the GP. He was led to believe that what he said would be accepted at face value along with the various letters, reports, repeat prescription list etc that he gave to the lady at the CAB when the form was filled out.

 

If he had been told that that was to happen he would have stopped the claim as he knew the GP knew nothing about what was being put on the form.

 

No it may appear that way, but it is not the reason at all. It is the last straw to be honest.

 

How can I say this. Up until 1998 we have always had very supportive family GP's. We moved to a totally new part of England, over 350 miles from our old home.(North West to the South East). We knew nobody. We found pretty quickly that the people here are more stand offish. That went with the GP's. They had no time to chat, no time to ask how are you doing. So as time went on we became more disenchanted with the attitude that the GP's had. We felt that we couldn't approach them. Then we lost all communication and faith in them. Finally for the past few years they are seen as just another service like calling out the plumber for a leak. Get it repaired and probably won't see you again for a few years.

 

I think a lot of it is not understanding how the 'Southerners' live. In the North West, everybody is more friendly. We see the people from the South as being self centered, and not really able to reach across to others. No compassion, no caring, just doing a job.

 

If this had have happened back up North, for a start our GP knew everything, so that would have not been a problem. If there was something that wasn't clear, he would have been on the telephone asking my husband to go in to see him.

Down here, nobody bothers, no one seems to care.

We feel that we are on an island surrounded by a lake with no way to get over it.

That is why I can't see it ever working again with any GP.

Edited March 13, 2011 by SueP1944

[jackieandwayne]

Oi! I am a southerner! I am not a cold fish and I look after other people! My GP is wonderful as well. LOL! But I did notice when I used to visit friends in Coventry and Birmingham many years ago, how warm and friendly northeners seemed to be. Totally different is north and south! I get what you mean.

 

I'm only reading between the lines here, but I think you and your husband may have isolated yourselves when you moved.

 

Now, about this DLA and AA. Well I qualified for DLA at the lower rate. When I sent the form off, I filled in GP's details, and the consultant I was under, and I notified both of them that I had done so, so they knew to expect it. My Gp then contacted me and gave me the choice, I could either write to her and tell her how my life was affected or I could go in and see her. I wrote to her. And then three weeks later got the DLA.

 

I wasn't overly happy about all the questions and rigmarole either; however, don;t you think that really, that's all bloody life is? Rigmarole from one day to the next? I wanted that benefit, therefore I had to speak to people about it, even if it was uncomfortable and I didn;t like it. It got me what I wanted in the end.

 

And all this about your husband being frightened of being whipped away into hospital - I'm sure that is a very real fear for him - I hate the damn places, I'll only go unconscious. However, if hubby is not mentally ill and dangerous, or at death's door and out of it - I can't see anyway he can be forced into a hospital if he chooses not to go. But you will have to work on him with that one!

 

Seems to me this benefit is for you - once you have jumped through all the hoops. I don't like to see people give up. I think I would try and make contact with the GP as soon as possible and have another go with him or her.

 

Goodluck.

[SueP1944]

Oi! I am a southerner! I am not a cold fish and I look after other people! My GP is wonderful as well. LOL! But I did notice when I used to visit friends in Coventry and Birmingham many years ago, how warm and friendly northeners seemed to be. Totally different is north and south! I get what you mean.

 

I'm only reading between the lines here, but I think you and your husband may have isolated yourselves when you moved.

 

Now, about this DLA and AA. Well I qualified for DLA at the lower rate. When I sent the form off, I filled in GP's details, and the consultant I was under, and I notified both of them that I had done so, so they knew to expect it. My Gp then contacted me and gave me the choice, I could either write to her and tell her how my life was affected or I could go in and see her. I wrote to her. And then three weeks later got the DLA.

 

I wasn't overly happy about all the questions and rigmarole either; however, don;t you think that really, that's all bloody life is? Rigmarole from one day to the next? I wanted that benefit, therefore I had to speak to people about it, even if it was uncomfortable and I didn;t like it. It got me what I wanted in the end.

 

And all this about your husband being frightened of being whipped away into hospital - I'm sure that is a very real fear for him - I hate the damn places, I'll only go unconscious. However, if hubby is not mentally ill and dangerous, or at death's door and out of it - I can't see anyway he can be forced into a hospital if he chooses not to go. But you will have to work on him with that one!

 

Seems to me this benefit is for you - once you have jumped through all the hoops. I don't like to see people give up. I think I would try and make contact with the GP as soon as possible and have another go with him or her.

 

Goodluck.

 

Thankyou for those comments,

I'm sorry if it sounded like that I was criticising 'Southerners' I was not. In fact, I have found that those in the South East are not as friendly or open as those in the South West. I know this from personal experience. I had long standing friends that lived in Tavistock, Devon as well as Woodbury, Devon and Ferndown, Dorset. They were, to us very similar in outlook and opinion as those from the North West.

The South East is very much, 'I've got a bigger house', I've got a more expensive car' and 'we go to a more expensive resort for a holiday than you do'!

But yes the Northerners are very much ' come in love have a cup of tea'.

Yes we do feel isolated, have done since we moved here. I don't want to get into personal things, but even down to neighbours, we still only know maybe 6 people in the village.

My husband had a very outgoing attitude towards starngers. He would always say hello, and ask if the weather suited them or how is the garden coming along?. Most ignored him, a few looked at him as though he had lost his marbles, and at best he would get a grunt back.

That followed through with the GP. It was always business, time spent, and all manner of rules and regulations, including where you were allowed to park your car as the neighbouring property had complained about exhaust fumes reaching their gardens!

Little by little we learned to speak to no one, or ask any questions. In the end (over the past few years) we have become hermits. It is made clear to us by existing residents that we do not fit in and as for my husband calling every woman he speaks to as 'love', he has had his fair share of stern rebukes.

We were just not able to accept the coldness and business attitude shown to us by the GP. Fish out of water you could say.

So we learned to survive with each other. We knew no one would offer help if needed, or even bother to ask if we were alright. The GP, made it clear to us that he was not there to discuss anything other than what was the immediate problem. So it put us off,

You were so lucky that your GP took the initiative to contact you after receiving the request for a medical report. I really do wish that they would be half as obliging here.

Neither of us would have a problem with speaking to the GP about our problems, if only they would make it seem that we matter to them, are valued by them, and that they do it in a friendly manner. As it is, we feel that we are interupting them and putting them out.

There have been many times that a phone call would have made a difference. Maybe the time after I nearly lost my husband in 2004 when he was in a critical condition and in hospital for over 2 months, most of the time in the HDU. I had to bring him home, he hadn't eaten anything for 2 months, couldn't walk because he had no leg muscles. I had no help from anybody, no contact with the GP, I was frightened witless as I didn't know how to look after him. Eventually I muddled through. It would have been nice for someone to ask if I was OK, or could I manage.

Still I don't expect anything from anyone anymore, and don't ask for it either.

As regards the hospital and his consultant. We both know what the future holds for him. The longer he can stay away from that place the better. I know he worries about me and how I will cope. We spend each and every day together helping each other. If he was to open up to the consultant I know he will worry that they will have him in for more tests etc. Sometimes it is better not to know too much.

I know you mean well, but I just haven't got it in me anymore to take on a fight with the GP. If I did, I know that he will not be at all happy for not telling him and will blame me. Then how do I tell him the reason why without getting angry or upset? I won't give him the satisfaction of seeing that in me.

Thankyou again.

[jackieandwayne]

Oh aye, Ferndown. well now, those folks are a different breed again! LOL. I don't know many from SE but I suspect SW's are seen as yokels! Anyway doesn;t the SE get all the posh ones from London? Bankers and what have you?

 

You know, my parents, albeit a bit older than yourselves, they are in a similar position. Both have ill health, dad in and out of hospital, arthritis, heart, diabetes and so on, mum, 6 years younger having all the worry of it, neglecting herself for his sake. I see them slowly withdrawing more and more, they are totally reliant on me when dad is ill and can't drive and i know sometimes they don't tell me things for fear of worrying me. Do you tell your daughter what is going on and how you feel?

 

This business with the doctor. Well, I think you have got yourself into a right viscious circle over this one. How about you request an appt with the practice manager, go in and see him or her and just tell them what you have managed to tell us on here. Or write to your GP. This could well break down the barrier. Failing that try the practice nurse instead.

 

Now, you know what you said about sometimes swapping drugs with your hubby when you run out? Well, I shouldn't go telling the GP that, but I would stop doing it. I think it is very clear you are anxious, run down and depressed, and no doubt neglecting your own health some what. It could be that you need to treat these problems in the right way, and taking very powerful pain medication won't help you feel any better mentally. Not in the long run it won't. And all the time you remain low like this you will look at the situation askew. I see it in my own mum frequently, she feels like the whole world is against her but it really isn't. She self medicates sometimes as well with dad's drugs, when she runs out of her own, and I can always tell when she has done this. I also know that she gets worn down by constantly looking after dad. She wouldn't have it any other way but I know often she wishes it was different, and she often has a quiet weep over what she has come to accept as "their situation". In fact "thier situation" is becoming a very comfortable place for them to dwell, even if it is not a good situation, and this is very dangerous. If you are completely honest is this what has happened to you?

 

If you are feeling lonely and isolated, is there any local authority sheltered housing in your area? If so, pop along and see what social activities they offer, very often they welcome people from the outside to bump the numbers up for coach trips and what have you. When I worked for local authority these outings could become quite riotous, I know they were very popular. They used to do all sorts of things for the whole community so they'd get youngsters and oldies together. You can get a list of such sites from your local council housing dept.

 

Otherwise, are you in a position to be able to move to an area where you'd be able to settle down? Worrying I know with all the health factors, but can it be done and would that help at all?

 

I really hope you can give the GP situation one last chance, and a good chance, meaning that you are completely honest with the GP or whoever you speak to/write to. They won't care that you haven't said before. Loads of people fret about "bothering" the GP, but that is what they are there for. You can make it perfectly clear that you intend to care for hubbie at home in as far as it is possible - and as I said, except for extreme situations, nobody can force anybody into hospital. If you can just get through this GP hurdle, your life will change for the better.

 

Stay strong. XX

[jadeybags]

Yes we try to help other people. And as for saying that we maybe 'benefit cheats' is something that I will not accept.

As for most people visiting their GP's when they are ill, some do some don't. If you have the medication you need, there is no need to see anybody, unless you are a sort of person that moans and groans about everything in life.

Yes there are cheats but there are also a lot of ordinary people like us that don't manage to get what we think we should be entitled to.

My husband didn't ask about a DLA claim at the CAB, he went there for something totally unrelated - Pension Credit. After talking to the Benefit Advisor it was her that said that he should be entitled to more than the Lower Rate Mobility which he gets for not being able to go out a great deal and needing help in going out. It was her that orgainsed the foms that came to the house. My husband had no idea that he might be entitled to more, he never raised the question.

And if my husband had have been told that the DWP would want a report from the GP, he would have stopped the claim there and then and told the lady that a report would not be possible as the GP has no idea what his life was about.

 

He currently receives ESA and is in the Support Group, due to his medical conditon.

 

Er yes, it's not nice is it, but some of us on here have been accused of being benefit cheats & had to go through insulting interviews to prove not so, all I am saying is, just because people are aged, it doesn't mean they can be any different, & they shouldn't be treated any different.

Any dept that pays out benefits need to make sure they give it to the right people.

My son used to get DLA because he is hearing impaired, had that from the age of about 2 until 11. His TASS teacher actually got us that. Then it was stopped. Could have reapplied, but I assumed as he was older by then they didn't think he needed it anymore. True the hospital visits were less & his TASS teacher no longer came here, she goes to the school. But he will always be a hearing aid wearer, that wont change.

They have certain procedures they follow now. It's not like it used to be.

That's just the way it is.

[Nystagmite]

Yes there are cheats but there are also a lot of ordinary people like us that don't manage to get what we think we should be entitled to.

 

That's your own fault, imo. You're basically expecting benefits - yet, won't see any medical people to confirm that you have care needs.

 

he should be entitled to more than the Lower Rate Mobility which he gets for not being able to go out a great deal and needing help in going out.

 

He shouldn't be getting LRM if he can't get out.

 

I think people that genuinely have a struggle with illnesses tend to visit their doctor a fair bit.

 

I think it depends. I have IBS and have done for the last 4 years. They tried all the medication they could and none works. I've seen a dietician too - but that hasn't stopped me having problems. The last time I saw anyone relating to this was earlier this year - because as a result, I also get excess stomach acid from time to time.

 

I only see my optician and ophthalmologist once a year because there is nothing they can do to repair the damage I have to my optic nerves. I do struggle a lot yes; but there's no point in seeing anyone when no-one can do anything to help me.

[SueP1944]

Thankyou, all of you,

 

jackieandwayne I appreciate what you are saying, and a lot of it does make sense. Would you mind if I digest it all first and see how we feel? I will be ringing NHS Direct in a little while. You have brought up some valid points and I need to respond to them after a bit of thought.

jadeybags Yes it is very upsetting when we are thought of as being 'benefit cheats'. That is so far from the truth it is unbelievable. Times are different, and they seem to have left us behind. As for having to live how it is today, we both find that extremely difficult. Preferring to have each other is our strength.

Nystagmite Have you not read a thing I have said? Do you not realise how difficult it is to do as you suggest? As for my husband's DLA payment, this is because he can't get out without help!

[jackieandwayne]

You do all the digesting you need, make your hubby digest also! I'm glad I've made you think. That's better than getting in a state. Just take a deep breath, a step back, and look at the whole situation again, and be really honest with yourself. The solution is there, you just can;t see it yet. XX

[jackieandwayne]

Oh, while I remember too, my dad is 100% reliant on my mum, always has been, and not always due to age and infirmity either - just typical man of his time. Would have difficulty finding the kettle sort of man. A couple of years ago my mum needed an exploratory operation to her chest. Well she rallied against it, no way was she having it, so on and so forth. The district nurse came to see her to try and persuade her and realised that part of the problem was mum not wanting to leave dad alone. Dad actually said to her "what about me?" and the nurse told him exactly how it would be. "You Mr XXX will just have to come second for once and for a short time".

 

I suppose what I'm saying is that if you don't look after yourself, including your mental well being, you'll be no use to hubby; Mum didn;t need this op in the end, and that filled her full of beans, this rubbed off on dad and he was like a spring chicken for a fortnight! As you and hubby are together and alone 24/7 you will rub off on each other - his fears will become yours and so on.

[SueP1944]

Oh, while I remember too, my dad is 100% reliant on my mum, always has been, and not always due to age and infirmity either - just typical man of his time. Would have difficulty finding the kettle sort of man. A couple of years ago my mum needed an exploratory operation to her chest. Well she rallied against it, no way was she having it, so on and so forth. The district nurse came to see her to try and persuade her and realised that part of the problem was mum not wanting to leave dad alone. Dad actually said to her "what about me?" and the nurse told him exactly how it would be. "You Mr XXX will just have to come second for once and for a short time".

 

I suppose what I'm saying is that if you don't look after yourself, including your mental well being, you'll be no use to hubby; Mum didn;t need this op in the end, and that filled her full of beans, this rubbed off on dad and he was like a spring chicken for a fortnight! As you and hubby are together and alone 24/7 you will rub off on each other - his fears will become yours and so on.

 

Thankyou,

 

You are right in all of what you say. I have printed off a copy of your advice and comments as there is so much there that is of great help. I will certainly be discussing the idea of getting into the community with my husband.

 

It will be there as a record so that we can use it as a reference and a guide when the time comes round to doing something positive .

 

I really really appreciate what you have said, It is a shame that somebody just like you doesn't live near to us. Thank you for pointing me in that direction and giving me food for thought. Finally, yes you are right about feeding off each other, we do depress ourselves which makes it harder to see through the depressed state we get into.

 

I thought you might like to know what is happening with the GP's. I have left this message on the NHS board but I will repeat it here for you.

 

Thankyou.

 

NHS Direct telephoned today and I had a long talk with them. The gentleman was very understanding. He asked me to give an example of what the problem is about. I told him about not having any support from anybody when my husband came out of hospital, I told him about the 'overdose' that had been prescribed for my little grandaughter, the time when my husband was diagnosed as a Type 1 diabetic and that he never received any advice about how to maintain his health bar a prescription, and of course the time that the GP had me in tears after telling me off for not going any earlier to see what the results were for my last Xray and bloods.

 

The gentleman said that a complaint should have been made for all of these issues. He then said that the PCT??? would have looked at these matters with a dim view.

 

He told me that nobody is made to register with a GP, it is entirely voluntary. The walk in centre provided it is GP led, could be used instead of a GP practice. However, the one local to me is not, it is Nurse led?? He also pointed out that even if we used the walk in centre, there is no guarantee that we would get anything other than basic attention which will not be good for our health.

 

He gave me some alternatives. The first is another local GP but there are only 3 surgeries a week, Tuesday afternoon, Thursday & Friday mornings. Or I could take the current GP to task with a complaint to them direct. Neither suits really, one because it would be sods law that one of us will fall ill on the days that there isn't a surgery and secondly, we are not fit enough or strong in character to take on that sort of fight.

 

He suggested that PALS??? could intervene and arrange a meeting outside of the surgery, with the Practice Manger, the senior partner GP and ourselves, but with them acting as mediators.

I think that is the only real alternative to us. However we do have fears that if doing that, and staying with the GP afterwards, will only lead to more trouble for us and a more 'distant' attitude and less comfortable future appointments than currently exists.

 

I have spoken to this PALS thing this afternoon and again, someone is supposed to ring me back in the morning.

 

Well at least I have resolved some things and will see what they suggest tomorrow. I must admit that taking this sort of action terrifies me, and I daren't mention this yet to me husband. I know what he will say - to hell with the bu**ers!

 

 

You have been so kind to us, thankyou.

[jackieandwayne]

Well, now that you have been nudged into looking outside the box (none of us really feel comfortable doing that, it can be scary) just try to go with the flow and see what new things your life will offer.

 

Despite what anyone says, everything comes out in the wash one way or another.

 

Stay strong, and post up as and when you need. Best of British to you! LOL xx

[SueP1944]

Just to bring everybody up to date with what is happening.

I am waiting now to see the senior GP with help from PALS. This meeting won't take place until the end of April due to holidays (my GP).

 

My husband's DLA claim is still up in the air as I am waiting for info from the DWP (copy of the claim form, GP report, Consultants report and any other evidence they used to fail him in January. As soon as that comes in, I will go through it.

 

As regards my AA claim which also failed in January.

I had taken the bull by the horns and asked DWP for a copy of the AA claim (same as my husband has done for his DLA claim). The paperwork came through this morning. The claim form looks OK, although I could add a bit more to it.

What has shocked me is the GP report! To be honest if I didn't know me and just had this report in front of me, it looks like I am both a liar and wanting to 'con' my way into a benefit that I clearly don't deserve.

 

I won't go through the whole report.

But, on the front page it describes my illnesses/disabilities/condition quite truthfully. Osteoarthritis, Hiatus Hernia, Water Retention & Cyst on Liver.

 

Yet inside it just says that there are a number of ongoing health issues, Water Retention, Osteoarthritis and a Cyst on the Liver – uncertain if any of these are ‘disabling’

Then the other sections are left blank. No details of history, how they impact or relevant investigations. This is despite that there are many of them over the past 7 years.

Then onto clinical findings – hand x-ray shows minor osteoarthritis. Liver cyst discovered 11/10. This is despite the fact that I can’t even do any buttons up, get myself in or out of the bath or even peel a potato. The cyst was discovered in 04, not 10. Went back to GP in Nov 2010 due to severe pain in stomach area, and the GP was shocked that the size of it had grown from 5cm in 04 to 14cm now! Am seeing the same consultant I saw 7 years ago next week in London. No mention of arthritis in the knees which is the worst of my problems although it has been ongoing since 04 when I saw a consultant and had an op. The consultant said that there isn’t much he can do apart from a couple of new knees.

Medication. All it says is the medication for Water Retention. Nothing mentioned about the pain relief medication for the Arthritis or the anti inflammatory medication for the Arthritis or the medication for the Hiatus Hernia, or the anti depressants in trying to cope with my limited abilities.

And finally- Any Known Disabling Conditions: Fully capable of looking after herself, no difficulty with awareness of danger and for mobility – attends the surgery!

She (the GP) has missed so much info off the form it makes me out to be ‘a possible fraudulent claimant’. No mention of the CT scans blood results etc

So there we have it. With that now public record, there is no way on this earth that I will ever succeed in an AA claim. The GP can’t now change that report no matter what happens at the meeting without her looking a complete idiot in the eyes of the DWP.

I am expecting the same problems with my husband.

I have decided now not to take up the DWP offer that they have agreed that if I get an appeal in by the 28/4/11, they are prepared to accept it. No point really with that damning evidence being handed around.

 

Never mind, at least I now know what I should have done in the past, but still can't get it out of my mind that the GP hasn't even put down the things she does know about, never mind those that I have never discussed with her! Even after this meeting if this is the way she is working I will still not be able to guarantee a half decent report at sometime in the future should I decide to make one.

 

As you can imagine this has now shattered what little faith in the GP that I did have.

Edited March 30, 2011 by SueP1944