Dont know where to turn.

[guy_edinburgh]

Hi everyone.

This is my first post here, and a real cry for help as i'm now at cracking point with my debt.

 

I currently owe a few companies money.

They are

 

Northern Rock (loan)

HBOS (loan and account arrears)

EGG (CC)

Capital Bank (CC)

 

Now,

I stupidly got myself into debt about 5-6 years ago, and it's all spiraled since then.

 

I took a loan out for around 10k with hbos, at around £460 per month, which was fine, until i had to change job to a lower income.

I was then unable to keep up the payments, and started using CC's to make the monthly payment etc..

 

Obviously i then couldn't afford to keep meeting monthly limits, so i got a loan from NRock to consolidate, through my own stupidity again, i squandered the money and eventually had nothing paid off.

 

I now have a Charging order against our house, although we moved house a few months ago, this was placed on us the week after we moved, so now in a battle for the title of the house, as it has to be clear for a set period after moving, thats another issue though.

 

I entered an agreement through the court with Blair Oliver & Scott, to pay them £50 per month, which is fine, i'm meeting that. (total debt 8k with them)

 

I had an old HBOS current account which i never touched for a while, which was up near it's overdraght limit, because i never used the account, it was passed to Blair Oliver & Scott only this month, i've yet to make a payment. (£1400 debt)

 

My Egg card has been on going for a while, and i managed to bring it down to around 2k oweing, but have not been able to afford a payment for a good while now.

 

The main card i used to pay everything was a Bank Of Scotland Preference card, which when i can, i try to pay off at £50 through a company called LTC.

 

My Northern Rock loan, is the only one that i have never failed to pay, never missed a payment at all, so there's no issue with that.

 

As is with some people i expect, my wife knows nothing about these debts, apart from the 2 Blair Oliver ones.

 

Now that was bad enough, and i hate keeping this from her, but she WILL leave me if there's anymore debt.

I've even not contacted any debt companys as i dont want mail arriving which may give anything away as she works part time, so gets the mail every day.

 

We have a 1 year old daughter, and i clear £1400 per month.

£1150 goes into a joint account for mortgage, food, petrol, bills etc.

I'm left with £250 to myself, £193 of that is paid to Northern Rock for my loan, and £50 to Blair Oliver for my loan through the court.

 

This leaves me a grand total of £7 free money every month.

Ontop of this, i still need to pay o2 for a phone contract, which i'm going to have to try and get out of after already defaulting with them this year, although now sorted.

 

So you can see where my money needs to go.

I really dont know where to turn to, or what to do next.

I dont want to lose my house/wife/daughter just because i'm in Debt.

 

My wife has always worked hard to save for herself, and this would kill her to know how bad things are with my debt.

 

What should i do next ?

 

I sit at work practically in tears thinking about this every single day, and then put on the good old brave face for everyone, and the same when i get home.

 

Many thanks

[honey5]

i really dont know what to say apart from you are in distress that is very obvious, but i have never tackled banks nor cc as yet so cant advise. I only hope that you can get this sorted but one thing i do know and that is that youve come to the right place for advice Please try not to worry ( i know thats easy for me to say) but your wife will notice if something is wrong and you are not yourself

hopefully someone will be along to help you shortly

best of luck

honey x

[jake44]

I know its hard not to worry but honestly there is light at the end of the tunnel. We were severely in debt and tried like yourself to pay money to all of our debtors. You can't pay out more than you are getting in. It took me a long time to realise that . I had buried my head for so long.

 

I gave myself a shake and made an appointment with a money advisor at CAB . Pressure instantly lifted. They wrote to all the companies offering a pto rata payment of what I could afford. Ok it will take me longer to pay the debt but circumstances can change and I can clear the debt quicker if I like. The letters and constant phone calls stopped and I can finally relax. Husband offerd better contract with more hours etc so things will get better. If you face up to the debt now before its too late. Hope this helps.

 

Take care

[Robdblynd]

Hi and welcome to the best place on the planet for geting help and advice.

 

Firstly, your credit cards ... are you in arrears with them and if so, have you thought about reclaiming any late payment charges etc? Whilst not necessarily clearing the debt this will reduce the amount of debt and you could possibly then offer a regular small payment to them in an attempt to clear the balance completely.

 

Blair Oliver and Scott are not the easiest people in the world to deal with but if you complete an honest income and expenditure sheet you could try and negotiate a payment for the HBOS account which would be realistic given your expenses and which you could manage every month. You could also consider reclaiming any charges imposed on your curent account which again would reduce the outstanding balance.

 

Sorry I can't hlelp with the charging order as I've no experience whatsoever with that but I'm sure someone will be along fairly soon who can advise you.

 

Try not to worry too much, with help and a little self discipline all these things can be made manageable. I know none of the measures I've suggested will clear your debts but they could reduce them to something more manageable for you.

 

Good luck with whatever you try to do and do keep posting and let us know what you're doing and how it's going.

 

And if you need help, just post on this thread and someone will be along to help, the people on this site are fantastic.

 

http://www.consumeractiongroup.co.uk/forum/faqs-please-read-these/

 

http://www.consumeractiongroup.co.uk/forum/bank-templates-library/

 

Try reading these links and they'll offer guidance on what you can do and how to do it. Also read the stickies at the top of this forum, they're full of terrific advice.

 

You could also contact CCCS (Consumer Credit Counselling Service) free, confidential on 0800 138 1111 or National Debtline (again free and confidential) on 0808 808 4000. They could help you sort things out.

 

Keep you chin up and keep smiling.

[guy_edinburgh]

Guys,

I cant thanks you enough for replying.

The Current account is going to be challenged, as most of it is made up from charges.

My credit cards are both in arrears, and are both with debt companies now, when i get any extra cash, i do make a payment of £50 to the company, but nothing regular.

 

I find myself trying to fob them off with excuses to delay payments etc.

Not ideal but it sometimes works, but wont last forever.

 

I'm trying to sell the odd thing on Ebay to even make a small payment to some companies, not much, but at least a token payment is better than nothing.

 

As for the charging order, i dont mind it to be honest, but just a pain it was put on just after we moved, so this may jepordise the title of the house.

And of course, having that, we cant remortgage either.

[jake44]

This was the situation that we were in a few months ago . Not answering phones. Didn't want to open mail. Any payments that I managed to make were eaten up by the charges and the interest. I have had £1200 back in charges so far and I am awaiting the rest. It really does help to try and get the interest on hold until you clear your feet.........

[Surfer01]

It may be wise to sit down with your wife and admit your "stupidity" (not my words but been there) and see if you can perhaps work something out otherwise this going to bite you unexpectedly on the rear. As only you know your wife, think of the best way to put it over to her without her getting too upset. Probably the best way would be to suggest that she take charge of all the finances while you stand back. Entirely up to you whether to discuss it with her or not.

[Bug]

As is with some people i expect, my wife knows nothing about these debts

 

Know that feeling. My two debts/court actions (them against me) come from ages ago and my OH knows nothing about them...he may do one day but I'm the only one who can decide if/when to tell him. I agree with Surfer01 to some extent but the time has to be right.

 

Sit tight on here - help will come along - til then you will have the emotional support from the rest of us. Not much practical help but I found it great to know that I wasn't alone.

 

Bug

Sorry Robdblynd ... didn't see you'd replied!

[stan5131]

There are lots of things to make a start with here. Firstly you need to send CCA Requests to your credit card companies (template letters on this site). This will put the accounts on hold while we deal with the charges. At the same time, send SAR to them. You will receive the last six years of your statements and can start working out the charges. Often, the charges far exceed the outstanding balance.

 

With regard to HBOS loan and account arrears and Northern Rock you need to do the same. CCA Request and SAR. When the information comes back you also need to look for an PPI that applies. It is staggering how many people have ppi and dont even know they have it. There may be an issue here too.

 

Make sure everything is sent by recorded delivery (very important). When the information comes back we can then deal with the charging order.

 

You should tell your wife that you are going to reclaim some unawful late payment charges back and that the accounts are officially in dispute until you receive the information. People who are not in debt are doing the very same thing so it doesnt necessarily mean an admission of your debts to those from whom you wish it remain private. I know honesty is the best policy but I really do empathise with your predicament and am therefore not going to preach on that one.

 

I am suprised you havent already been receiving calls at home from DCA's. Should this happen it is inevitable your wife will find out. Most of the morons at these call centres lack discretion.

 

Lastly, there is light at the end of the tunnel and you have find the right place.

 

Stan

[Hopeful1]

Hi Guy.

 

Stan has given you some good advice. As you think of questions post them up. Also try to read as many threads as possible to help you understand the process with CCA requests, charges and PPI reclaims.

 

I would also consider sitting down and working out your budget. Offer your creditors what you can afford, even if it is only £1 a month.

 

http://www.consumeractiongroup.co.uk/forum/general-debt/20758-creditors-dcas-letter-templates.html

 

The budget planner is on the 2nd page.

 

Best Wishes ;-)

[Hopeful1]

I empathise with your reluctance to tell your wife. I've been in the same postition with my husband. With the help of this site i've got on top of the worst of my problems without telling him.

 

It's not ideal, i've wished i could have shared the burden many a time, but the consequences of sharing would have been far worse for me.

 

I hope you can work this out without adding to your stress.

[womble72]

Hi Guy,

 

Everbody on this site has money problems and this is the best place to take advice.

 

My wife and i have been in debt for two years now and it is not easy but if you deal with the creditors via a debt plan or a cab you will feel a lot better.

 

You have made the first step by coming on to this site so keep your chin up and take us much advice as you can from people on here because you are in safe hands.

 

It will be down to you if you tell your wife but may be in the long run you should tell her because she will find out sooner or later because creditors can be a pain in the a**** when trying to plague you with calls.

 

Just dont put your head in the sand.

 

Good luck

 

Womble:)

[benson05]

Hi,

If you dont want to go o CAB it may be worth your while talking to Payplan or to CCCS agree with prevois threads it would be worth CCA'ing. Regarding Blair Oliver Scott we have a BOS loan which has beem moved o them and they are excepting payments (touch wood) through Payplan (and these payments are very much reduced). If you do ring Cab or Payplan or CCCS hopefully you will feel slightly better and then will be able to tell your wife, it is very difficult to carry all this worry yourself but honestly you can work through it and you will learn to deal with it more effectively

 

Keep Smiling,

benson05

[Hopeful1]

Hi,

If you do ring Cab or Payplan or CCCS hopefully you will feel slightly better and then will be able to tell your wife, it is very difficult to carry all this worry yourself but honestly you can work through it and you will learn to deal with it more effectively

 

Keep Smiling,

benson05

 

I have seen it advised that if you use CAB to ensure you ask for a financial advisor. I have no experience of them myself.

 

[irhut]

Hello guy,

I was in a similar position to you 6 years ago and I can safely say that the best two things I have ever done was to ring payplan and then tell my wife all about it. I was very fortunate in that she stood by and supported me and I am now debt free. (Well almost!) Payplan really are excellent.

 

Ian