Help at my wits end

[wally0163]

Hi

I have read lots of posts here over the last few months, I started work in 2007 for a large housing association with accomodation, which in itself is a major problem.

During the last 19 months I have had accusations, allegations been investigated all which proved unfound, almost a year ago I was assaulted by a resident which was reported to the police, ended up going to court and the resident being found guilty, this did not result in a sentence, but this person was ordered to pay compensation to me, they then appealed the decision and I am now due back in court for the appeal, the company I work for has constantly questioned my work practices, and been extremely worried at how i am seen dealing with this resident, he has made allegations of breach of confidentiality, he has been very intimidatory and abusive with me.

As your home is always at risk as it comes with the job, this last 19 months have turned me into a shadow of who I was, I am constantly stressed and really dont know where else to go with this.

As i am a lone worker, I feel very unsupported and am constantly being scutenised on everything I do based on this persons complaints.

Please can someone advise as what I can do to try to deal with this nightmare situation.

Thankyou

[diamondgirl]

Hi Wally

Don't worry someone with more knowledge will be along soon. I'm afraid I can't help you on this and I am sure it is very distressing for you. Rest assured you have come to the right place for help and advice and I am sure someone will be along to help. If you don't get anyone along soon who can help you out I suggest you click on the triangle and one of the team will look in on you.

DG

[wally0163]

Thankyou for that, which triangle do I click, have not had any other responses yet

[poppynurse]

Hi Wally,

 

Sounds like you're having a horriblible time - hopefully one of our employment experts will be long soon to offer help.

[jackieandwayne]

I am in social housing, but not as a house manager/warden, as you are. I know all about the problems you have just described from former colleagues. Also I did lifeline call out work for many years, as a lone worker, calls usually coming early hours of the morning, OAP just woken up, very grumpy, not taken meds yet, can be aggressive, men and women alike. They very often can and do hit out at you with sticks/canes, claw at you, pull your hair out, and all you are trying to do is clean up the mess they've made in their bloody bed! And the abuse - oh yes! You just have to ignore it and don't respond to it - but certainly make a record of it every time.

 

I had a visit to a very posh house once to an elderly lady who had fallen and called for help. At 1am in the morning (bloody coldest night one February!) I'm in her porch having to smash a window because she's put the safety chain on. Get through the door, there she is on the floor, in agony, shouting, swearing, screaming, well ok, we can deal with all that. I could see her hip was broken, angle of her foot, but would she stay still? I had to get down on the floor with her to try and comfort her, make her stay still, and she had the cheek to tell me to get out of her house because I was a smoker and I stunk! She told me I was one of the commonest creatures on earth, and that she would have me sent to prison for breaking her front door glass! Ambulance came, she was just as abusive to them (two men and she'd wet herself - if she had allowed me to help I would have made sure she had clean dry underwear on at the very least before the men arrived!). To cap it all she then, six weeks later, put in a formal complaint about me. However, I was a bit quick thinking at the time of the call - I deliberately left the lifeline machine open so the whole event was recorded. I then did this as a matter of course at every situation where things were going to be heated. Are you able to do this if you have to visit him?

 

I'm sure someone will advise you shortly of the solution to this, but in the meantime, as you probably already know, be on your guard with this resident at all times. Do not see him alone, even if that means that if he puts in a call for help someone from a nearby site has to attend, either to deal with him or to accompany you. For normal day time calls, is there a tenant rep living on site who may be willing to accompany you? Or are you in a position where you can call him on the intercom rather than a personal visit?

 

The bottom line is this person has already been convicted of assaulting you, he should now be red flagged on the HA's system which means no lone working with him! I am at a loss to understand why the HA have not evicted him for assaulting you? In my opinion they have an outright duty to ensure your safety at work, and in your case, even more so, because you are a lone worker. Assaulting staff should be a serious tenancy breach.

 

If you haven't already, please join Unison. They may not be able to assist now because this is an ongoing situation which started whilst you were not a member, but if there are future problems which threaten your job and home they can get involved.

 

I wish you all the luck in the world - I know exactly what elderly/vulnerable people can be like - very sad but true, and hey chaps, guess what - we're all going to be like this one day too!

[diamondgirl]

Hang in there Wally trying to find out who the best is on employment for you.

DG

[wally0163]

Thankyou so much, it was good to hear from someone who has experienced a similar situation.

I have worked with the elderly many years now and know how some of them can be, however this man knows what he is doing, he has just waged a complete hate campaign, he has accused me of misuse of club funds which I have never held, he reported me to POVA, he constantly abuses me and shows intimidating behaviour all the time, following his last assault conviction he caame to the office with a large hack saw and I just shook from head to foot, not because he scares me but of the notice the HA takes, everything is in his favour, I guess because he is seen as vulnerable.

I am constantly worried about losing my home and never know what he is going to do next or allege next.

Before coming to this HA this men spent over ten years in jail abroad, I dont know why and the HA only have said it was nothing to worry about, there was never any personal alerts for this man, and over the last 5 years he has verbally abused residents and staff.

I am afraid I beleive the HA do not wish to be seen to be evicting a vulnerable tenant.

I beleive this man will stop at nothing till he sees me lose my job and my home.

As for recording stuff, the HA warned me about writing anything on this mans file, i once used the word difficult and was really pulled over the coals about this.

This whole nineteen months has destroyed any faith in my organisation and as said I have just lost a massive part of myself, I am good at my job and always enjoyed it, there is nothing to protect you in this situation, however I will try to join unison, thankyou

[jackieandwayne]

Ok, so you must keep a record of all this, just don't put it on his record. Keep your own notes and keep those notes out of the office.

 

What I suggest you do now, is join Unison straight away, if you are not already a member. But this will be for anything that happens from the time you join, not what has already happened.

 

For what has already happened we will have to try and help you on here. I am no expert on employment issues, have a few issues myself, but there are some excellent experts in that field who help on here.

 

But I can and do understand what you are suffering, and why. You need to go to your GP as well and get this on record. It is clearly making you ill. Are you a lady or a guy? Just wondering.

 

Its a sad fact of life that there are those people who you cannot help, and here is one of them. He has been convicted of an assault on you and continues in this vein, he has upset other residents and staff. He will not stop. What to do? Eviction, or at the very least the threat of it, and a good ASBO wouldn't go amiss by the sounds of it. He's living on a sheltered site where the possibilities of further mayhem being caused are countless. I'm afraid I'd be looking at the overall welfare of all the other residents - if this man can assault you he is not a vulnerable person, if he were my tenant I'd tell him - you either start acting appropriately or you get out and I don't care very much which. I'm not suggesting you actually say anything of the sort to him, but next time he starts up try thinking it whilst blocking him out.

 

Ask your HR Dept for copies of both the Lone Worker policy and the formal greivance procedure. You will also need to know what the policy is on rehousing you if you have to quit your job. Do you have children at home? Can the Council help with housing? You could request a transfer to the next available position at another site.

 

Whatever you do, if it were me, I'd begin right now with my notes, mentioning witnesses where necessary and then keep it updated daily. Then I'd put in a grievance.

 

You just reminded me, a colleague of mine had a staffie, it was her little girls pet. One of the male residents absolutely hated my colleague and complained bitterly about the dog. He got nowhere because there was no proof. Then a resident's cat was bitten very badly and need emergency treatment, this guy blamed it on the staffie and even stated he had seen it clear an 8ft fence to get the cat! I went to the hearing with her, and I know I wasn't supposed to say a lot, but they got me so riled - they just wanted the dog to go whether guilty or not! My colleague was being given the choice of break her daughters heart or lose her home and job of 20 years! In the end I just said, who saw the dog do this? No-one. Did the vet state this dog bit that cat? No! Is the dog capable of clearing 8ft when he's only 2ft of the ground himself? Most probably not! Has the complainant got good eyesight? No he had cataracts! Did the cat owner have a problem with the dog? No, she loved him and couldn't believe it had done such a thing - she hadn't seen it - only this nasty old man. Game over, dog stayed, no disciplinary, and the following year the old boy popped his clogs, so game really was over!

 

I know this demoralises you and makes you feel low, but do stick up for yourself in this, you too have rights, perhaps the most important is the right to a safe working environment. And people threatening you with hacksaws is just not on. Also, I know its sometimes very difficult, but if you are genuinely afraid of this guy, do whatever you can not to let him see it - it'll just make him worse.

 

Goodluck and I expect some of the employment experts will post up here tonight.

[wally0163]

Thanks so much,its good for someone to begin to understand, I am a woman, my daughter is at college, but still lives at home.

As I say i have been doing this many years and it is only more recently when I have felt this vulnerable.

This person will continue this campaign, he is the most vile person and has a little following of supporters(thankfully not other residents) last time we went to court he recruited his little group who sat in my eyeshot shaking their heads and making gestures, they did however get moved, this Friday I go back again and it makes me sick too my stomach, however it is another hurdle to cross.

The HA will not do anything and I know this is really impacting on my health, I am never one to go sick but I know by the way i feel, the scary thing is how situations like this eat away at you and bit by bit you begin to lose who you are.

My GP is also the doctor that all my residents are with and at times I have to ring the surgery for the residents usually trying to insist on a visit, I then would find it extremely difficult to sit there discussing myself, when do we do that? we are so wrapped up with trying to deal with every issue regarding our residents.

Last weekend i ended up at A&E with the second bout of shingles in the time I have been here, the Gp suggested that this was stress related??

I now beleive there is no point keep plodding on with this and am trying to explore other avenues, however it has completely zapped my confidence, I feel like a little mouse.

With regards to HA housing me they have no responsibility to do that, so i will need to sort that myself, the council do not want to know as we are not a priority.

I am sure with the right advice I will get there in the end, you already lifted me by beginning to understand

Thankyou

[wally0163]

Re above court appeal for this man again tomorrow, does anyone have any advice as to what i can expect from my company following the same verdict

[jackieandwayne]

As I understand it, if you click the triangle, it will alert the mods to your thread. There is a lovely person Elche who may be able to offer employment advice. If she will, its the best.

 

I know what you should be expecting from your employer, but you need proper advice about what in reality you can expect.

 

Good luck tomorrow, I'll have my fingers crossed for you.

 

Stay calm, deep breath and a quick run through in your brain of what you are going to say before it actually comes out of your mouth, and remember what I said, however much this man frightens you don't give the silly old whatnot the satisfaction of seeing it. He probably gets a kick out of it.

[jackieandwayne]

Wally, how did it go? Going out for lunch now but will check back this afternoon. Hope you are ok?

[wally0163]

Hi there, yes it was a very nerve wracking day but the guilty verdict remained the same, he now has even more costs to add too the first lot.

I dont beleive the HA are going to do anything about this man, and I think the time may have come for me to make a decision and start looking for somewhere to live with a view of changing jobs.

Thankyou so much for your advice and understanding its so reassurring that there are people out there who really know how it is

[elche]

Hi Wally,

 

Sorry i didn't see your post sooner.

 

If you can wait till tomorrow I'll try and get back with some constrcutive (hopefully) advice.

 

Hang in there and stay positive

 

Che

[wally0163]

Hi Elche

Thankyou so much

I have just had four days off work following this court case, my boss said I should take it.

I have heard that you are so good with the advice you give, however I feel totally at a loss with this, professional boundaries tell us how to behave ect ect.

My boss says I should speak to this man like butter wouldnt melt, however he has now been found guilty twice of assaulting me yet i am responding as I would to any other tenant, I just want to protect myself now.

I would be so grateful if you could advise tomorrow, thankyou Elche you have a great reputation on this site

Kind regards

wally

[wally0163]

Well following the guilty verdict last week my boss told me to take last week off, I looked and felt particularly wrecked, the last day of my leave I cut a piece of grass in the gardens, one of the people involved with this resident decided to take pictures of me I can only assume that they beleived I may be off sick, he has now even fitted CCTV on his door in the hope that he may see me entering his property, I think not.........

However these are the things I deal with on a daily basis

And as said this man will stop at nothing

[ccridersuz]

Poor you, how awful what sort of company would allow their employees to be treated so badly? You may be on your own, but surely the company you work for has a duty of responsibility, I know nothing about these things, but I would suggest you re-read your contract of employment, I am sure that the company you work for are very much at fault, in not supporting you and indeed are making your position harder. I would speculate that this man has other complaints listed against him and it might be a question of approaching your local council's housing authority, you have the same rights as everone else when it comes to your home, it does not matter who owns it. The Local council will send you a diary type form to fill in, which will be investigated. Especially if other's also have complaint's about this man.

I used to live next door to a total fruitcake, who because she was under a local (nut) doctor, could not be touched. Even the police where powerless to interfear. I actually went to my local paper, who ran a story. The Council couldn't rehouse me quick enough. But since then injuctions have been introduced. Had they been available back then, life may have been easier.

At the end of the day any Private HA has to answer to the local Council,. Therefore, if your empolyer's are failing the neighbours of this man, that has got to breach there agreement with the local council.

 

Please don't leave your employment because of one person. Take it from one unsuccessful jobhunter (todate) not many jobs around at the moment!!

Anyway, good luck don't let them win

[diamondgirl]

I just can't believe that your boss has not helped you. It is disgraceful. Why are they allowing him to get away with this. If the shoe were on the other foot you'd have probably been evicted. There must be something else that you are able to do. Perhaps Elche may have some ideas. It sounds like he needs an ASBO serving on him then when he breaks it they could lock him up.

We all have a right to work and live without harrassment and torment and it seems you are in need of a lot of help from your employers and I would also say the Council, Police may be but we all know they can be pretty useless at times.

Please keep your chin up and try to a smile a little think of the other nice people there are around you, remember he's in the minority. Please don't give a job up that you like just because of him and also there is not very much work around at the moment.

Anytime you feel down just post your feelings up you will get lots of help.

DG

[wally0163]

Thankyou for that, the difficulty is if I leave here regardless of situation, I actually make myself homeless, council will not help.

My concern is the impact that this has on me I am a bundeling wreck, yet I have been in this game 20+ years.

Sheltered housing has little or no protection and the customer regardless of their acts are always right

[elche]

Hi Wally,

 

Certain a tricky situation you find yourself in, without a doubt. Obviously with the added complication of no job = no home.

 

Firstly I would echo the above advice re joining a union.

 

Secondly, do you have any insurance policies that have legal expense cover? - I'm not saying for right now bit it could prove useful if it turns into an unfair dismissal claim.

 

Thirdly, does the HA have a lone workers policy? There seems to be some potential health and safety issues here if you have been assaulted and thus suffered personal injury at work. There could be the possibility for an employer's liability claim, the limitation being 3 years from the date of injury / knowledge.

 

Fourthly, you mention in the OP about constant questioning of your work practices (I presume by your employer), one idea may be to make a chronological record of these and present this to your employer in the form of a grievance letter, either formally or informally. The problem I have with formal grievances is that they may sound great in theory such as in law books or ACAS codes, but in reality in some organisations once you stick your head above the parapet in this manner, it can lead to a negative impact on your relationship with your employer.

 

Fifthly, I would begin to keep a diary of event, contemporaneous diary entries make fantastic evidence.

 

Sixthly, it could be prudent to begin looking for alternative work – but I think you already knew that!

 

Good luck and keep positive

 

Che

[jackieandwayne]

The HA MUST have a lone worker policy Social Housing staff are lone workers generally, and in this case Wally is at a "remote site" as well.

 

Elche, this man has been found guilty twice now of assaulting this lady. The HA should have served him with NOSP for tenancy breach at the very least. I can't understand why they don't just evict him!

 

I'd have his whatnots on a pole at the entrance to the site if this were anything to do with me!

 

I always understood an employer to have an outright duty of care towards the employee whilst at work?

 

All the rest is over to you I know nothing about employment law really. But I do know about HA's etc and this is so wrong!

[wally0163]

Well I am now into my second week of special leave, spurred by the fact that the person i referred to in previous posts taking photos of me connected to this man has now somehow found out that four years a go i lost my job and persued this to a tribunal, however the company made a satisfactory out of court settlement.

This person is now threatening to divulge this to current employer even though this is my second job since then.

I know it seems that I am totally paranoid, but now everytime I see this person I physically shake.

Yesterday I was made aware that a meeting went ahead with this person and of course am assuming the worst.

My boss is coming to see me tomorrow and does not want to meet on site, he has asked me to strangely meet him at a bus stop close by and we will go to a nearby pub.

I dont know what else to do about this, it seems the HA are trying to make me feel uncomfortable, I am getting to the point where I just feel I hould leave now, even though of course I will lose my home.

But just being able to wake up without this sick feeling everyday would be a bonus, is there anyone who can advise what else I can do

[wally0163]

Please someone, I know this is long winded, meeting tomorrow!!!!

[jackieandwayne]

Wally, it doesn't matter what happened last year, two years ago or four years ago. The issue is about what is happening to you now in your current position. Your HA have taken you on and have no cause for complaint, so I fail to see how they could act on you leaving a job under the circumstances you describe. YOU know they have nothing to complain about - you have done nothing wrong, have been assaulted and now suffering harassment.

 

If this does come to light it should warn your employer that you will stand up for yourself if you are pushed hard enough.

 

This meeting today is very important to you, it is your opportunity to state very calmly how unprotected you feel, how disappointd you are at such a caring organisation failing to take immediate steps to ensure your well being at work. I think you have to makeit very clear that you cannot visit this man alone, and quite frankly they should not be asking you to after this.

 

Don;t hand your notice in - as you say, its your home as well. That will make it a victory for the OP toerag, and an easy job for your employer.

 

Make sure you can either tape the meeting, or take some notes and ask for an accurate transcript of what was said.

 

I'll keep my fingers crossed for you, but if you dig your heels in, hold your head high, I think it will go fine for you.

 

And also, now you've said about losing a job before, I think, as would be perfectly normal, your confidence has been knocked by that. Try and separate out the two things when you have your meeting, this is about this job not what happened previously. I know how difficult that can be, but try hard.

 

Good luck, the end result should be he gets a NOSP, you get a written assurance that you no longer have to visit this man alone.

 

I shall keep everything crossed for you. Put in a grievance if this meeting doesn't go the way you think it should.

 

And photo's of you? Ok, wait for a very dark night, catch him with the camera and make the swine eat it! Then tell the guy to photograph that!

[wally0163]

Well meeting was very short, boss asking if there was anything more they can do for me at this time NOSP being discussed with company legal team, further complaints have now come in on Monday of this week about me from same source, boss not discussing them at the moment, however he wants me to extend special leave, I want to return to work.

He is going to ring me tomorrow, and I have a feeling if I donnot extend my leave they will suspend me to investigate further complaints received.

As I said in earlier posts complaints allegations ect always come from the same source.

And i just feel that I am in a no win situation, I feel incredibly uncomfortable, and undermined in my position.

Thanks for your support I went into my meeting feeling a bit higher