School issue

[Sneaker]

Hi folks.

 

I've an issue and it's not a consumer one, so I've put it here, but I was hoping for your advice.

 

My 15 yr old daughter went to a party - no problem.

She kissed a boy - no problem.

She was caught on camera, no face showing - no problem.

Someone put it on their facebook / bebo along with all their other party photos - no problem.

 

Here comes my problem. A teacher at her school somehow got / was given a printout of this photo and put it on his whiteboard and wrote a comment beside it during afternoon tutor group. Basically she was sat on a swing with the boy and the comment said "[her name] obviously didn't see the other swing". This teacher thinks he's funny and desperately tries to get "in" with the kids.

 

My daughter only saw the photo accidentally. She wasn't around at the time it was put up as she's not in the teacher's tutor group. She was upset that she wasn't present to defend herself when she was the butt of the joke, and that it could have been there for quite some time for all to see before she found out about it. Normally she can take a joke very well.

 

I personally don't think he should have done what he did and I haven't raised any issues yet.

 

I don't know if I should request that the teacher apologises, leave things alone, or whether it's more serious than that.

 

Just thought I'd get some views first. so, could I have your views please?

[reallymadwoman]

As an ex-teacher, I would say that at best this teacher was unprofessional and if it had happened to my daughter I would be thinking about a complaint.

 

However, as always you have to consider what you/your daughter want to achieve and whether complaining is the best way to go about it. If you make a formal complaint, the head teacher will be obliged to investigate which will undoubtedly involve speaking to at least some of the pupils present. This may or may not cause your daughter even more problems than the original incident, only you and she know how she might react to the gossip it would undoubtedly cause.

In an extreme case it could also cause future problems with the school. We all know it 'shouldn't' happen, but occasionally a child/parent can be labelled as troublemakers for making a perfectly valid complaint.

 

In my opinion, you both need to talk this through and decide what it is you want to achieve. In an ideal world this teacher would be reprimanded for unprofessional conduct and the incident would then be forgotten whilst everyone gets on with the important stuff, but if achieving the ideal is going to cause difficulties, then principles have to go out the window when it's our kids involved.

[jonni2bad]

Moved to general issues...

 

If it is correct that the teacher posted the picture / made the comment, then I think it was misguided. If this caused your daughter some embarrassment then they should be prepared to apologise for that.

 

If it were me, I would approach the Head and outline my concern, but would make it clear that I'm not seeking any direct action against the teacher involved, merely highlighting the issue so that if there were previous cases of "misguided" actions, then at least the Head would be up to date with the actions of his staff.

 

It seems more like the actions you would expect from a pupil (I don't mean this to suggest I think it WAS a pupil, I just state this to show how the action was perhaps inappropriate).

[Sneaker]

It seems more like the actions you would expect from a pupil

 

Absolutely. This guy is trying his best to get "down to their level" and all he ends up doing is alienate the kids.

 

I know of 1 other incident that was reported by a parent about an inappropriate joke he told the class.

 

I don't want the upheaval of a massive complaint but think the head should be aware as has been stated. Hopefully I can achieve this then. I just wanted to check that I wasn't over/under-reacting.

[Sneaker]

Just an update. My daughter has asked me to do nothing yet, so that's what I'll do. She's found this website RateMyTeachers - Teacher Ratings by Students and Parents and I think there are a few comments on there about him, so 1. she knows she's not alone in her views on him, and 2. can post a comment.

[reallymadwoman]

Perhaps an informal chat with a senior member of staff or your daughter's own tutor would also be in order. If this teacher is regularly behaving inappropriately then a bit of advice from someone more senior might get him to mend his ways.

 

If your daughter really doesn't want you to do anything at the moment, there's nothing to stop her 'mentioning in passing' to a teacher she trusts.

[patdavies]

Despite advice here to involve the headteacher, you simply must follow the complaints policy as published by the school's Governors.

 

This will start a complaint lower down the school management tree than the HT. If you do not follow the policy, the school is entitled to ignore your complaint.

 

It will concentrate minds greatly if you write to the HT and simply ask for a copy of the complaints procedure - nothing else, no detail and certainly no reason as to why you want it. If the school cannot produce it, then they are in breach of the law and you should separately complain about this in writing to the LA.

 

Lastly, if you do complain formally, you are not a party to any disciplinary procedures invoked against this teacher, indeed, you are not entitled to know whether there is any disciplinary action, never mind its outcome. You may however, ask for and get a written apology to your daughter.