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    • OK. Thank you all for the input.  I'll ignore their letters of demand but NEVER ignore a letter of claim. I'm bracing myself for the stress as their demands £££ goes up and the case gets sent to debt collectors. 
    • OK.  It was worth a try. Their case is still pants and they have broken their own Code of Practice numerous times.
    • @BankFodder sorry for the delay and thank you for the lengthy reply. Yes, I agree. It's a small business and the guy is very very decent. I know someone else said my priority shouldn't be worrying whether he gets shafted but I'm not here to try and screw him over because I feel like if someone behaves decently and gets exploited, they might not behave so kindly in the future. I know DX mentioned he thinks I've caused the issue by leaving multiple instructions, but I have already explained why and both instructions were to leave it with a neighbour and there was nothing advising the driver to abandon the parcel on my doorstep. I don't think leaving it there could be considered a safe place.  I am still waiting on the retailer to respond. Ultimately, I wanted to know how he would proceed if DPD's response isn't favourable. I am certainly not looking to cause any problems. I just want my laptop. I will read the other posts for sure. I've been a bit preoccupied with family stuff. I have nothing in writing from DPD as I phoned them, but they did advise it should be the retailer that liaises with them. I tried contacting the driver straight after deliver via Whatsapp, as that's an option, but it said I couldn't send him a message and I have kept that log. We all know who took the parcel on our street, because that person has a history of parcel theft, but I don't have a doorbell camera or cctv. Police are refusing to intervene, despite the fact that I, along with several other people, spotted another's neighbour's parcel in said "suspect's" car and confronted her to get the parcel back. If the police had acted sooner, I might have had a better chance of getting the parcel back, but I suspect the laptop has long been sold on.  When the retailer responds, I will send him the link to this thread. Hopefully, he will benefit from the information on here as well.
    • @dx100uk none of the instructions advised them to leave the parcel on my door step and without such instructions., I'm struggling to see why they think it's ok to just dump it there.
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employment/bullying resulting in a nervous breakdown, advice please


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I am in such a mess i cannot see the wood for the trees. I have worked for the NHS for 16 months now. During that 16 months i have experienced bullying on a daily basis from a group of 4 other employees. I was isolated, accused of poor performance, subjected to rumours, shouted at, threatened and even asaulted. It came to a head last year when i was hospitalised with a perforated stomach ulcer resulting from sheer stress.

I went back to work after 12 weeks sick and it did not improve. The department in question is known for bullying, and the managers were aware but refused to take action, prefering to heap more stress on me to * not give them a reason to bully me*. For the last few weeks i have been unable to sleep and when i did i had nightmares and since my operation i developed an addiction to painkillers, somehow they helped me cope with the bullies, basically i diddnt care. I used to vomit before i went to work, vomit during work and spend all night terrified to go back. I became a nervous wreck and my GP prescribed anti depressants.

 

Now this is the part i am ashamed of, on Friday, my kids were away for the night and i stole a diazepam vial from work. I dont know why i did it, i just knew it would help me sleep deeply enough not to have the nightmares. It was a moment of madness i will pay for for the rest of my life, i was caught. Part of me is relieved i dont have to go back there but im scared what will happen now. My Gp has said i have had a nervous breakdown. I have never done anything like this before ever. I just wanted a night of peace.

 

So far i havent heard from the police for two days, they caught me with it at home after an annonymous tip off. I pannicked and diddnt say anything to them, they said they can trace the vial through lot numbers, but i fully admit i did it. I know il never work in that field again and fully expect and deserve to be struck off the register.

 

My GP has issued a sick note on a monthly basis and i have agreed to a detox program and treatment. Do i resign or wait to be sacked? to be honest i was going to resign before this, i have never been so miserable working in that department. I dont know what to do for the best as i also have bills to pay and rent.

 

I fully understand i have no right to ask for advice, i did it, i deserve to be punished, so if i get no replies i understand why. I just wanted the bullying to stop and they wouldnt do it. I dont trust my on judgement at the moment and would appreciate some practical advice on what i can do now regarding resigning/any benefits i could claim/do i let them sack me? Please help.

[COLOR=blue]THAMES CREDIT: STATUTE BARRED LETTER SENT [/COLOR][COLOR=red]No reply[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]HILLSDEN SECURITIES: CCA REQUESTED [/COLOR][COLOR=red]No reply[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]ROBINSON WAY: CCA REQUESTED [/COLOR][COLOR=red]In default, 30 days up 6th April[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]LOWELL: CCA REQUESTED [COLOR=red]In default 30 days up 6th April made offer for F&F - refused [/COLOR] :D [/COLOR]

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some of this is not making sense, first you say you stole a viale that your workplace can trace via serial numbers, then you say "So far i havent heard from the police for two days, they caught me with it at home after an annonymous tip off. I pannicked and diddnt say anything to them, they said they can trace the vial through lot numbers, but i fully admit i did it. I know il never work in that field again and fully expect and deserve to be struck off the register."

 

How did anyone know you stole the vial in the 1st place? for the police to come to your house?

 

you worked for 16 months and you have been bullied all that time, did you put a grievance in?

 

why did you go back to work after 12 weeks if you were still not well, did your employer threaten you?

 

sorry for the questions but if you can give more details it would give a better picture

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thank you for your reply

 

the reason the police found out was because someone from work had seen me take it from the box and anonymously informed the manager and it was reported to the police who then attended my home. It happened within 3 hours of me leaving so policys had to be consulted ect which accounts for the time i left to when the police turned up. I apologise for not being very clear. Im ashamed, exhausted and receiving treatment for my mental health.

 

I followed the grievance policy to the letter, in fact i asked them to move me to another dept for a week for the managers to see that i was good at my job ect - other employee`s had reported it previously. I only had a meeting 3 weeks ago with one of the senior managers and i reported it again then. Even the manager said i should not have to suffer abuse. But nothing was done. I went back to work after 12 weeks as i was pressured into it by my manager and her manager, i was left with the impression that if i did not go back, i wouldnt have a job to go back to.

 

I know i deserve the consequences, i breached trust, i disgust myself quite honestly

[COLOR=blue]THAMES CREDIT: STATUTE BARRED LETTER SENT [/COLOR][COLOR=red]No reply[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]HILLSDEN SECURITIES: CCA REQUESTED [/COLOR][COLOR=red]No reply[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]ROBINSON WAY: CCA REQUESTED [/COLOR][COLOR=red]In default, 30 days up 6th April[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]LOWELL: CCA REQUESTED [COLOR=red]In default 30 days up 6th April made offer for F&F - refused [/COLOR] :D [/COLOR]

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The best thing is to let them fire you if you need to claim benefits.

 

I think if you leave voluntarily and state that you had to leave due to bullying / depression, you could still get benefits.

 

The above doesn't apply for ESA - only JSA.

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Be aware that, if you are dismissed for gross musconduct (and, from what you've said, that is a likely outcome), then once you claim benefits they will contact your employer and you will most probably be sanctioned and lose entitlement to JSA for a lengthy period of time!

 

This won't be the case uf your GP signs you unfit and you put in a claim for ESA.

 

Feebee_71

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thanks again for all the replies. I saw my GP again this morning, who has signed me as unfit to work. What is ESA please? i dont understand the benefits system.

[COLOR=blue]THAMES CREDIT: STATUTE BARRED LETTER SENT [/COLOR][COLOR=red]No reply[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]HILLSDEN SECURITIES: CCA REQUESTED [/COLOR][COLOR=red]No reply[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]ROBINSON WAY: CCA REQUESTED [/COLOR][COLOR=red]In default, 30 days up 6th April[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]LOWELL: CCA REQUESTED [COLOR=red]In default 30 days up 6th April made offer for F&F - refused [/COLOR] :D [/COLOR]

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thank you suzie, ive read the policy for my employers and i will be dismissed for gross misconduct, so the way i see it is thats the end of the road for them, why should they pay me sickness benefit?

 

the bottom line is they have caused the breakdown by refusing to act on the bullying, however i accept total responsibility for what i did, i wasnt in my right mind at the time, its not an excuse but a mitigating factor. My GP gave me a sick note for two weeks and is reviewing my medication and progress every week, so the sick note will be reviewed every week or so. But in the meantime i have a child to support and a mortgage to pay and no savings - im terrified to tell you the truth

[COLOR=blue]THAMES CREDIT: STATUTE BARRED LETTER SENT [/COLOR][COLOR=red]No reply[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]HILLSDEN SECURITIES: CCA REQUESTED [/COLOR][COLOR=red]No reply[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]ROBINSON WAY: CCA REQUESTED [/COLOR][COLOR=red]In default, 30 days up 6th April[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]LOWELL: CCA REQUESTED [COLOR=red]In default 30 days up 6th April made offer for F&F - refused [/COLOR] :D [/COLOR]

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thank you suzie, ive read the policy for my employers and i will be dismissed for gross misconduct, so the way i see it is thats the end of the road for them, why should they pay me sickness benefit?

 

the bottom line is they have caused the breakdown by refusing to act on the bullying, however i accept total responsibility for what i did, i wasnt in my right mind at the time, its not an excuse but a mitigating factor. My GP gave me a sick note for two weeks and is reviewing my medication and progress every week, so the sick note will be reviewed every week or so. But in the meantime i have a child to support and a mortgage to pay and no savings - im terrified to tell you the truth

 

You should be able to get benefits as a sole parent and help with paying the mortgage (only the interest of course) and council tax

 

. I think you need some support from your union. Is there anyone you can contact?

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i am a member of a union, i will contact them, thank you

[COLOR=blue]THAMES CREDIT: STATUTE BARRED LETTER SENT [/COLOR][COLOR=red]No reply[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]HILLSDEN SECURITIES: CCA REQUESTED [/COLOR][COLOR=red]No reply[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]ROBINSON WAY: CCA REQUESTED [/COLOR][COLOR=red]In default, 30 days up 6th April[/COLOR] [COLOR=#0000ff]LOWELL: CCA REQUESTED [COLOR=red]In default 30 days up 6th April made offer for F&F - refused [/COLOR] :D [/COLOR]

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I may be barking up the wrong tree, but can you resign and claim constructive dismissal and then explain the circumstances with regard to the nervous breakdown and the mitigating circs of the theft?

 

Good luck.

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I may be barking up the wrong tree, but can you resign and claim constructive dismissal and then explain the circumstances with regard to the nervous breakdown and the mitigating circs of the theft?

 

Good luck.

 

CD is notoriously difficult to prove though, might need serious legal advice as it could be a dodgy route to take.

 

My best, HB

Illegitimi non carborundum

 

 

 

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i am a member of a union, i will contact them, thank you

 

The union should be able to support you through the disciplinary meeting(s) and also advise you on how to use mitigating factors (harassment, stress, effects of medication etc) to try to save your registration. They should have loads of experience with these issues.

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did you suffer a physical injury that caused your anxiety and depression or was it the bullying that caused it, whats the link for the direct gov site for the industrial injuries form?

 

how long are you off work suzie?

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  • 1 month later...
The union should be able to support you through the disciplinary meeting(s) and also advise you on how to use mitigating factors (harassment, stress, effects of medication etc) to try to save your registration. They should have loads of experience with these issues.

 

UNION will not advise stress, effects of medication they will tell you they are reasons for employer to let you go as they can say you can no longer do the job so UNIONS will advise against this. You would need witness to the harassment most wont stand against their employer for you trust me I know....

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UNION will not advise stress, effects of medication they will tell you they are reasons for employer to let you go as they can say you can no longer do the job so UNIONS will advise against this. You would need witness to the harassment most wont stand against their employer for you trust me I know....

 

The aim here is to save the registration not the job.

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This may have changed but back in 2003 I got fired for alleged gross misconduct (in my case, posting pictures of my graphic design work online, but I was working for an outsourced department within an investment bank so you couldn't expect any less). As I was a homeowner and in those days the benefit rate was just £52/week and there was a 9 month wait before you could get any help with mortgage interest, I wasn't desperate to sign on, however, I made a claim on my mortgage insurance and the insurers sent me a form which I had to return with a stamp from the Job Centre, so I went to make a claim for UB. My unemployment claim was approved with no fuss and I started getting my benefits, however, the insurers turned down my claim as they were told I'd got dismissed for gross misconduct. I was putting together an ET case but they wanted to see the transcripts! The point is, I had no problems claiming benefits as gross misconduct is open to interpretation and can easily be disputed

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This may have changed but back in 2003 I got fired for alleged gross misconduct (in my case, posting pictures of my graphic design work online, but I was working for an outsourced department within an investment bank so you couldn't expect any less). As I was a homeowner and in those days the benefit rate was just £52/week and there was a 9 month wait before you could get any help with mortgage interest, I wasn't desperate to sign on, however, I made a claim on my mortgage insurance and the insurers sent me a form which I had to return with a stamp from the Job Centre, so I went to make a claim for UB. My unemployment claim was approved with no fuss and I started getting my benefits, however, the insurers turned down my claim as they were told I'd got dismissed for gross misconduct. I was putting together an ET case but they wanted to see the transcripts! The point is, I had no problems claiming benefits as gross misconduct is open to interpretation and can easily be disputed

 

Claiming benefits I agree you should not have a problem even if you are sactioned there is emergency benefit you can claim during the saction time.

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