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pinkduchess v HSBC


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A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brandnew Jeep Cherokee advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, ayoung man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and a Boss tieleaned out of the window and asked the shepherd: "If I tell you exactly howmany sheep you have in your flock, will you give me one?"The shepherd looks at the yuppie, then at his peacefully grazing flock andcalmly answers "sure!"The yuppie parks the car, whips out his notebook, connects it to acell-phone, surfs to a NASA page on the Internet where he calls up a GPSsatellite navigation system, scans the area, opens up a database and 60Excel spreadsheets with complex macros. Finally he prints out a 150 pagereport on his hi-tech miniaturized printer, turns to the shepherd and says:"You have exactly 1586 sheep!""That is correct, take one of the sheep" says the shepherd. He watches theyoung man select one of the animals and put it in his Cherokee. Then theshepherd says: "If I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you giveme my sheep back?""Okay, why not" answers the young man."You are a consultant" says the shepherd."That is correct" says the young man, "How did you guess that?""Easy" answers the shepherd. "You turn up here although nobody called you. You want to be paid for the answer to a question I already knew. And youdon't know **** about my business because you took my dog."

[sIGPIC][/sIGPIC]If you think my post was helpful, please feel free to click my scales

 

 

A prudent question is one-half of wisdom.

 

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Keep me a good looking sheep Freaky. You'll recognise me 'cos l'll be the one in a Springbok jersey.

 

Another true story from law-student lore. Defendant appearing at Worcester Crown Court on a rather disgusting charge was asked if he had anything to say in his defence. He told m'lud he'd drunk eight pints of cider and as he walked home the sheep had smiled at him and so he couldn't help himself.

 

Think I've now figured out for myself what pmsl means after last night's nocturnal chats.

 

An educational thread indeed, pd, bet you're still sleeping:cool:

 

Regards to all.

 

Van

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Think I've now figured out for myself what pmsl means after last night's nocturnal chats.

 

Well done Van - I had to ask - I think it was Auburn (greeneyes) who told me, 'cos it 's usually her that's doing it! :D

 

BTW PD, the car boot went not bad - got rid of a load of junk, and came back with a new load of junk! LOL! :rolleyes:

Nemo me impune lacessit

 

 

Advice & opinions given by johnnymitch are personal, are not endorsed by Consumer Action Group or Bank Action Group, and are offered informally, without prejudice & without liability. Your decisions and actions are your own, and should you be in any doubt, you are advised to seek the opinion of a qualified professional.

 

 

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Now Johnny, you've really got me confused after a bad day:confused:

 

I think we're both on the same wavelength, as it were, but just can't believe it was Audreygreeneyes who enlightened you as she is so correct in all her posts.:cool:

 

So who's Auburn?:D

 

Must admit the name's vaguely familiar but can't find her on the 'search' function:confused:

 

Mind you, if it is Audreygreeneyes who's usually doing it, then I just hope she's wearing her dark trouser suit so nobody notices;)

 

This thread is really taxing the old grey matter: before much longer I'll be able to understand what they say on 'Eastenders'.

 

See you at Freaky's party?

 

Best wishes.

 

Van

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Having got that query put forward to johnny, I'm quite happy to watch pd having a bit of the old doh-si-do with her partner (in Spanish of course) and even jowalshy on the grapevine and stripping the willow.

 

Wish I knew what these ancient feudal customs were. Perhaps Freaky will enlighten me?

 

Are they anything like Morris dancing where all the chaps go jingle-jingle when they go to the Gents' (sorry unisex restrooms)?

 

I'm game for mostly anything (but not daisy chains!)

 

See yawl there folks.

 

Van

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I think that we were talking about the party in Freaky's barn turning into a barn dance.

 

[sIGPIC][/sIGPIC]If you think my post was helpful, please feel free to click my scales

 

 

A prudent question is one-half of wisdom.

 

:D

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So who's Auburn?

 

The quick answer, Van - Audreygreeneyes used to be Auburngreeneyes till she changed it - I preferred the original and she kindly gave me permission to keep using it...........:)

 

As for freaky's party , that really would be something if we could all be there.......... such a great rapport on this forum, it's terrific!:D

Nemo me impune lacessit

 

 

Advice & opinions given by johnnymitch are personal, are not endorsed by Consumer Action Group or Bank Action Group, and are offered informally, without prejudice & without liability. Your decisions and actions are your own, and should you be in any doubt, you are advised to seek the opinion of a qualified professional.

 

 

If you think I've helped you please feel free to tickle my star :-D

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PS

 

I've got a squeezebox if that's any help?

th_Pietro20Penta20V20crop.jpg

Nemo me impune lacessit

 

 

Advice & opinions given by johnnymitch are personal, are not endorsed by Consumer Action Group or Bank Action Group, and are offered informally, without prejudice & without liability. Your decisions and actions are your own, and should you be in any doubt, you are advised to seek the opinion of a qualified professional.

 

 

If you think I've helped you please feel free to tickle my star :-D

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I can knock out a tune or 2..... ;)

Nemo me impune lacessit

 

 

Advice & opinions given by johnnymitch are personal, are not endorsed by Consumer Action Group or Bank Action Group, and are offered informally, without prejudice & without liability. Your decisions and actions are your own, and should you be in any doubt, you are advised to seek the opinion of a qualified professional.

 

 

If you think I've helped you please feel free to tickle my star :-D

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such a great rapport on this forum, it's terrific

 

Me and my big mouth again :eek: ...... come back PD, Pete, Jowalshy -don't want to lose your expertise ,your humour and your good company .....:Cry:

Nemo me impune lacessit

 

 

Advice & opinions given by johnnymitch are personal, are not endorsed by Consumer Action Group or Bank Action Group, and are offered informally, without prejudice & without liability. Your decisions and actions are your own, and should you be in any doubt, you are advised to seek the opinion of a qualified professional.

 

 

If you think I've helped you please feel free to tickle my star :-D

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