I found the following under the dog section in the beer garden under the heading; What happens to the (Noble) Queen's unwilling subjects.

Thankyou Kia, ........ Kia.....why are my pliers covered in red paint and bits of ...what is this.........look a bit lit......skin?

I thought only Alligators lived in Florida!

I have some South American Bola's you can borrow Mistress Kia, they are soo much more effective at bringing a 'Gringo' to his knees. Your very umble and worshipful slave, Uriah Heap Ma'am.

by the front

tiglet

mascara

What happens fter the Queen has dealt with her unwilling subjects.

Especially when they have 'Happy Endings'. I'm off to get some more ice cubes to reduce the swellings. SQ xxxx Has anyone seen my pliers?

I knew there was another solution. Lion Doodoes

The Angels are fine, all well waited upon and looking sleek and glossy , but I did notice a greatly number of empty Grecian 2000 bottles in the bin though!!! Methinks if there are any giants of the 'Green' variety about, then ,if they value there corn in the cob, then they should be thinking of vacationing as far away as possible from the Angels habitat. A frend,(who did not heed his warning)

Knobbly knees, it

if not, it

For Angels, methinks these women are more likened to the 'Tribe of Amazonia'. Forgive me, I shall now return to my umble position of footstool to our 'Great and Noble Queen'. Emasculas of the forest of the Queen.

OUCH!!!!! Lord Blackadder, you were warneth that having touchest a raw nerve, the cosequences you now have to payeth. A frend who is no longer an entire.

with a candle

No Kat, she was definitely seen scurrying away with the White Rabbit.

What's that Kat? A fish in pyjama's!

Pepper. Mint, as long as it is controlled. Bottle of water. Also check the gardening books for anothe plant they hate. A notice politely asking them to s*** in someone elses garden. A gun, or if too drastic get a dog or another cat. But,....if you are not an lover of animals, then........MOVE. Joking aside, whether they bury it, or leave it on the pebbles, it's both smelly and unpleasant. I have little beds of pebbles with various shrubs growing out of them, the shrubs have been allowed to grow at will and extended upwards and downwards, the other day was time to clip the shrubs back. Bottom branches really were at the bottom, once these were cut back, it was time to scoop up the dead leaves, as these were on stones, this had to be done by hand. As I am not a 'Wuss', no gloves were used, grab a handful of leaves, feels funny, is it a slug, no it was cat s***, knew who the culprit was, the next door neighbours, the neighbour on the other side, has a cat who buries it, so one cat buries it, the other just leaves it on the stones. Luckily I have no flower beds so avoid being caught out by the other cat, but, and here is the rub, how can you say anything to your neighbour, have tried saying something in the past and was accused of being bias as it could have been any cat. My answer was to get a big, heavily scarred Tom who even put the dogs To flight, but that's another story. Just think yourself lucky it's only cat s*** you could have been invaded by moles like Jasper Carrott!

I found her on one of my many travels through time, she sort of just attached herself to me, and, who am I to turn away such an appealing lady. Yes, she is a 'She' (more faithfull and less likely to turn against you than a 'He'), and she is called Henrietta, it's a bit too much of a mouthful saying the name your 'Darwinian' People, (I believe they called themselves Scientists ) gave her, but today she is better known as a chicken. Dr Who, Time Traveller

WOW, how truly poetic, liketh the Queen's justice. Methinks my Lorde Blackadder would make a perfect jester.

My Pet

Methinks ye Lorde Blackadder needeth his codpiece to be liberally spwinkled with the powder of St Vitus. Squarebobe, rumour has it, that having had his priviledges taken away from him by virtue of the extra large nut crackers found in the good witch Madam Wooleycat's china cabinet and used withe much vigour and frequency by the Goodly Queen and her Court has been subdued and made more pliable and has now entered the service of the Queen and her Angels as a 'hand-maiden'. Stallion's take note, tonite is cracker nite, you have been warned, do not jump the high fences!

titilate

and give us