Bankruptcy help

[majorprobs]

Hi all, i really need some help as everything is slipping through my fingers and i dont have a clue what to do and would really appreciate some advice. I have been trying for years to get out of debt and have literally now tried debt management and every other idea i could think of. I have had a slow list of major impacts involving my family which has torn us apart and i feel like i am loosing everything. I have had to move out of the house that i shared with my wife and 3 children and even now that could be repossessed. I have been foolish and taken out loans to pay other loans and i know it was stupid and my own fault but i want the stress to stop it is costing me everything i hold dear to my heart (family). I earn a reasnably good wage but my ex partner does not and since a recent tradegy the debt has just mounted up and up with loans. overdrafts and secured loans etc etc etc.

 

I really want to be able to stop the continuos calling, letters and texts that i am getting even though i have been paying what i could. My wife has said she would allow us to get back together if i try and sort this out even if that means we loose everything and start our lives afresh. the house has 2 secured loans (both taken out within the last 2 years) and a mortgage totally costing us £900 - £1000 per month and is now heavily in negative equity, my other debts all loans overdrafts etc total £35000 or more. The total time for the dmp would be 7 years but the house has not been paid for the last 2 months and my wife is now looking for another house with the council but they have said we can not just hand back the keys as this would not help her request for a property. I honsetly cant cope anymore and need someone to slap me into shape before it goes even worst. Please let me know what my best option is should i just go bankrupt or is there a point in trying to sort this out to make all the creditors happy. I will never again use credit as it has cost me so much in my personal life, this will be the 15th year of my wedding and i am in so much pain inside knowing how stupid i have been to take loans and credit cards like i have in time. If i go bankrupt can i face nay jail terms i have not been dishonest just stupid, i know i will loose everything and am i best to let the house go first because that is going to happen soon anyway i really dont have a clue and really need someone to advise me before i have a total breakdown, each day it justr gets worst and seeing my kids and wife each day knowing i have caused thier pain as well is tearing me apart. PLease can someone let me know what vto do and what to expect as i am so afraid i will make a bad situation even worst. Separation and DIY Divorce An idea wedding present? Why not be prepared for the worst.

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[Dodgy Geezer]

Hi and welcome.

 

Im not going to tell what you should or should not do. Bankruptcy is a very personal experience, and one size does not fit all. I will however help you as much as possible in order for you to decide what is best for you.

 

I have given my opinion to you questions.

 

Hi all, i really need some help as everything is slipping through my fingers and i dont have a clue what to do and would really appreciate some advice.

 

Its important that you understand what bankruptcy involves. I have posted a link HERE for you to read.

 

 

I have been trying for years to get out of debt and have literally now tried debt management and every other idea i could think of. I have had a slow list of major impacts involving my family which has torn us apart and i feel like i am loosing everything. I have had to move out of the house that i shared with my wife and 3 children and even now that could be repossessed. I have been foolish and taken out loans to pay other loans and i know it was stupid and my own fault but i want the stress to stop it is costing me everything i hold dear to my heart (family). I earn a reasonably good wage but my ex partner does not and since a recent tragedy the debt has just mounted up and up with loans. overdrafts and secured loans etc etc etc.

 

Dont beat yourself up unnecessarily. We all make mistakes. What is important now is how you move forward.

 

I really want to be able to stop the continuous calling, letters and texts that i am getting even though i have been paying what i could.

 

This is the least of your worries right now. This seems compulsory in the DCA industry. Lets deal with that later.

 

My wife has said she would allow us to get back together if i try and sort this out even if that means we loose everything and start our lives afresh.

 

This is refreshing that you have each other. It seems from what you are saying that bankruptcy would be a way forward, but again, this has to be your decision.

 

 

the house has 2 secured loans (both taken out within the last 2 years) and a mortgage totally costing us £900 - £1000 per month and is now heavily in negative equity, my other debts all loans overdrafts etc total £35000 or more.

 

You have to decide at some stage if enough is enough.

 

The total time for the dmp would be 7 years but the house has not been paid for the last 2 months and my wife is now looking for another house with the council but they have said we can not just hand back the keys as this would not help her request for a property.

 

Voluntary repossession IMO is never a good idea. As advised by the council, this will not help your situation. Sit tight for now.

 

I honestly cant cope anymore and need someone to slap me into shape before it goes even worst.

 

Yes you can, you must for the sake of your family and future.

What you have done, is take a massive step in the right direction by seeking help. We wish you well.

 

Please let me know what my best option is should i just go bankrupt or is there a point in trying to sort this out to make all the creditors happy. I will never again use credit as it has cost me so much in my personal life, this will be the 15th year of my wedding and i am in so much pain inside knowing how stupid i have been to take loans and credit cards like i have in time. If i go bankrupt can i face nay jail terms i have not been dishonest just stupid, i know i will loose everything and am i best to let the house go first because that is going to happen soon anyway i really dont have a clue and really need someone to advise me before i have a total breakdown, each day it just gets worst and seeing my kids and wife each day knowing i have caused her pain as well is tearing me apart.

I have felt every emotion that you are suffering right now. My own Bankruptcy ends in 5 days, and i can assure you that there is life afterwards. The pain will ease, there is hope.

 

Have a read round. Have a cup of tea. Deep breath, and ask away anything you need to know.

 

One question at a time might be easier to answer, and for you to take in.

After all, we have the time if not a lot else.

[majorprobs]

Thankyou so much you are right i have to make a choice, i have spent this morning reading so many posts and to be honest i will think long and hard before i make the final desicion i want to speak to my wife and see if she really would take me back if i did it. Thankyou so much for you advice and taking the time to answer my questins. I will re post once i know what top do but would appreciate your continued advice if i have any further questions. Thank you so much

[majorprobs]

ok after the help dodgy geezer gave me yesterday i feel alot better. i spoke to my wife who has agreed that she thinks it is best to go bankrupt, the problem is the debts are mostly in joint names so this would mean she would also need to go bankrupt. as she said if i do it then she will but also she will see i am serious about getting it fixed. i have a couple of questions though and will prob have more as i go through things.

 

1. re the house i know it will be reposessed and to be honest i will be glad to see it go with everythin that has happened recently. Am i best in waiting for the repo before going bankrupt or should i just do it now. The house is the only asset i have and the furniture is not luxury things.

 

2 once the house is reposessed it may not sell as the area is not selling well at the moment, will this effect my bankruptcy i.e do i have to wait for a shortfall to be declared or can i advise the or i have lost the house but know there will be a shortfall

 

3 will the or penalise me in anyway due to having my house repossesed prior to bankruptcy.

 

sorry for the questions i am just trying my hardest to do things right,

[toddle2u]

1. re the house i know it will be reposessed and to be honest i will be glad to see it go with everythin that has happened recently. Am i best in waiting for the repo before going bankrupt or should i just do it now. The house is the only asset i have and the furniture is not luxury things.

I would wait for the repo. If you are looking into go into Council accomadation it will help your cause to have the property repossessed rather than voluntarily give it back

 

once the house is reposessed it may not sell as the area is not selling well at the moment, will this effect my bankruptcy i.e do i have to wait for a shortfall to be declared or can i advise the or i have lost the house but know there will be a shortfall

 

A provision for the shortfall will be included within the BR so just advise the OR of this

 

3 will the or penalise me in anyway due to having my house repossesed prior to bankruptcy.

No not at all

[palomino]

Do not voluntarily give up your house. If you do you will be deemed to have intentionally made your self homeless.

In these circumstances the council has obligation (or even liability) to re-house you.

[Dodgy Geezer]

i feel a lot better.

 

Im really pleased to hear this. Just sharing a problem can work wonders.

 

i spoke to my wife who has agreed that she thinks it is best to go bankrupt, the problem is the debts are mostly in joint names so this would mean she would also need to go bankrupt. as she said if i do it then she will but also she will see i am serious about getting it fixed. i have a couple of questions though and will prob have more as i go through things.

 

Again i find this very refreshing that you have each other.

 

1. re the house i know it will be repossessed and to be honest i will be glad to see it go with everything that has happened recently. Am i best in waiting for the repo before going bankrupt or should i just do it now. The house is the only asset i have and the furniture is not luxury things.

 

You might have to be pro active and inform the mortgage co of your intentions. When i went BR, i sat back and waited for my house to be repossessed, after 7 months, still NOTHING had happened except another 7 months arrears.

 

2 once the house is repossessed it may not sell as the area is not selling well at the moment, will this effect my bankruptcy i.e do i have to wait for a shortfall to be declared or can i advise the or i have lost the house but know there will be a shortfall

 

Once repossession proceedings have started, the only thing that you need to worry about is timing. Personally, i stopped paying everybody, mortgage, council, gas, lecky.

 

ALL these debts will be included up to the date of BR.

 

3 will the or penalise me in anyway due to having my house repossessed prior to bankruptcy.

 

Not at all. The insolvency service are fantastic. Non critical, and non judgemental.

 

sorry for the questions i am just trying my hardest to do things right,

 

Dont be sorry mate. People want to help.

 

I would wait for the repo. If you are looking into go into Council accommodation it will help your cause to have the property repossessed rather than voluntarily give it back

 

As i said above, and for the benefit of anybody else reading this, you might have to be pro active.

 

A provision for the shortfall will be included within the BR so just advise the OR of this

 

Indeed. The only difference that i can see between people who have properties, and people that dont, is that you are less likely to get an early discharge until after the sale of the property.

[majorprobs]

Hi everyone thanks for your advice things are really getting clearer for me i will keep posting and asking questions as i come across them but i really mean it when i say thanks

[Mr Worried]

Hi everyone thanks for your advice things are really getting clearer for me i will keep posting and asking questions as i come across them but i really mean it when i say thanks

 

Hi Mate

 

Sorry to here your problems, but you really need to be more positive, give yourself a shake and start taking the advice from here, and then you will move forward, I had similar probs such as yours this time last year, and if you read my early posts you will see exactly where I was in my life.

 

Keep ya chin up and any probs get posting and we'll help you through.

 

Good luck

 

Mr W

[dantripled]

hi major probs,

 

have been touched to read your thread and really really do feel for you. my situation is totally different from yours (loan problems) and i can't comment on your thread but what i can say is since i joined this group last month, i have finally been able to enjoy a good nights sleep!!!!!

 

The people on here are 110% genuine and so helpful it is untrue, i would go as far as saying they are more knowledgeable than the likes of solicitors etc... because the one thing they/we all have in common is that we've been there in one way or another.

 

The advice you get from these guys will be far more valuable than anyone elses. I sincerley wish you all the very best and hope you can sort out your money and family troubles sooner rather than later, but like dodgy geezer said, you've done the hard part now... you've finally plucked up the courage to ask for help and a problem shared is definately a problem halved in my experience!!!

 

chin up, things can only get better.

 

all the best

dantripled:)

[Mr Worried]

hi major probs,

 

have been touched to read your thread and really really do feel for you. my situation is totally different from yours (loan problems) and i can't comment on your thread but what i can say is since i joined this group last month, i have finally been able to enjoy a good nights sleep!!!!!

 

The people on here are 110% genuine and so helpful it is untrue, i would go as far as saying they are more knowledgeable than the likes of solicitors etc... because the one thing they/we all have in common is that we've been there in one way or another.

 

The advice you get from these guys will be far more valuable than anyone elses. I sincerley wish you all the very best and hope you can sort out your money and family troubles sooner rather than later, but like dodgy geezer said, you've done the hard part now... you've finally plucked up the courage to ask for help and a problem shared is definately a problem halved in my experience!!!

 

chin up, things can only get better.

 

all the best

dantripled:)

 

Well said dan.

 

Mr W

[majorprobs]

Hi dantripled and every one else,

thanks for your advice and support you have all been amazing i have a much clearer view and have started to take a bit of a proactive approach towards the housing situation. i shall keep you all updated.

cheers

[majorprobs]

Hi all,

Well things are starting to move along all be it slowly but i am seeing some things start to go the right way. The wife is now on a housing list for the council and housing association and i have just been moved into a one bed flat. The creidtors are actually not chaisng me as much as before since i told them my intention was to go bankrupt, the plan is that we will both go bankrupt at the same time probrably after xmas. Being proactive with the housing was a good idea as now my ex is able to arrange housing without the need to have a huge deposit which is great news. I have also spoken to my employer and explained in full the situation and they have actually offered some support which is great and they even gave me a written guarentee that my job wont be effected as i have been there for 10 years etc. Finally seeing some real good things happening, the hardest part i know is yet to come but i know i can get this sorted now thanks for all your help i will post again once i am near to the bankruptcy etc.