When the children reach 16, 17 or 18

[shalin85]

Hi, my partner currently pays for his kids to his ex. My question is this, How will the CSA know if the child is working or not living at home etc if the mother doesn't inform them? She's a nasty piece of work and it wouldn't cross her mind not to lie about such things.

Thank you.

[watchinginvestigation2011]

I know that in my situation as my son turns 16 end may, that tax credits and child benefit becomes relevant here at the same time. To continue with any form of benefit the main carer has to confirm wether staying on in school/college/education etc and I have to get on with doing that in the next few days as son going into sixth form for a levels if good enough grades, or resit gcse then a levels if needs to improve to a levels.

 

I should imagine the parent with care has to inform the csa if the child leaves school at 16 or any overpaid monies could then be fraudulant. I have not received any letters from csa myself yet re this only tax credit and it says if child not continuing then leave not returned and payments automatically stop unless filled in re those benefits xx

 

Dont know wether the forms I am filling in a viewable to csa, but I presume they are.

 

Also I have to say dont assume ex is a nasty piece of work to extent that would likely rip you off, try the nice approach and ask her what are the plans of the child and you will know then wether to expect csa to be continued or stop. My ex husbands new partner labelled me a nasty piece of work due to the csa setting a figure viewed appropriate for my two children and I was forced back then via csa to give the information re hubby at times employment due to claiming income support. No help was offered directly at that time financially by ex and his new partner got nasty when csa took money that said only went direct to state and blamed me for being vindictive, when it was totally out of my hands, to extent for some time hubby then decided one of the children was not his all of a sudden, which he later apologised for as he was the transgressor not me.

 

Its amazing how nasty some new partners can be towards and ex of their partner when the csa get involved, they automatically judge the methods assessing income as in I have heard they demand new partners wage of the parent with cares ex, as collectable when I accept the new partner has no due to the children. I remember finding out some of the nastiness that went on between csa and hubby and what was told to his new partner due to stress and him trying to placate the anger of the new partner. He years later apologised that this was felt by me and says I have done a good job with his children, he has now grown up and is making good progress appreciated by his children, who have always apprecaited wether I got the money as is now the case with benefit claimants or not for the majority of the years when it was rightly at that time eaten by the dwp, but the kids new their dad paid for them either way.

 

She used to abuse me over the phone and accuse me of taking her money and as a result caused great distress that she wanted what she creepily kept refering to her children. Turned out she couldnt have kids personally and thought my kids were an imediate family for her. She personally had a screw loose. The police were involved, warned her off, recorded her calls, so I add sometimes the problem is not the parent with care, but the anger of a new partner of an ex who realises there is baggage they hadnt bargained for wether that is fair or not as deemed by csa, it is not my place to say.

 

So I say again try the nice approach and you might find you answer readily given from the parent with care xx

Edited April 8, 2011 by watchinginvestigation2011

[shalin85]

hi, first of all, thank you for replying.

We have no contact, at her request. She didn't want to know my partner until she was short of money and contacted the csa when the kids were 12 and 8.

Previous to this, she denied my partner dna tests (there was always doubt) and then told him she had the kids tested with the other man she was cheating on my partner with, and (she said) the results came back as the kids were this other mans. It's a really long story. So my partner left the home and moved away, started a new life, met me and we've now got kids of our own.

With that kind of history and the things she has been saying about how she gets money for nothing and blatently boasting about how she's fiddling the benefit system etc. You must understand that we know what she's like and she is a nasty peice of work. She's even admitted to us that she only had the kids to get money because at the time my partner was earning 'big bucks' (her words). She openly admitted to lying about being on the pill.

The woman infuriates me with her attitude and lying.

You can imagine my partners reaction after being told they weren't his, 8 years later, a letter pops through the door demanding money for them after all that time.

Sorry for rambling, i just know she wont inform the csa of any changes if it involves her 'losing out'

Thank you.

[watchinginvestigation2011]

Well I understand there are nasty parents with care as well. The only thing I can suggest is your partner rings the csa and asks what will happen due to your concerns.

 

I had pill issue with my second child too, I didnt know ex had new partner and he I suppose had to tell her he wasnt well you know with me and thats how she assumed the second child was not his and he had to play along. Thing was my epilepsy meds at the time were knocking the pill out and well nature took its course.

 

p.s. If you want a giggle I found out because he called out her name on one occassion !!!!!!! So he obviously loved her.

 

But in any case you have rights too, so get onto the csa if she wont tell you. I would think any payments made in error would have to be refunded to your partner so she could get into a lot of trouble if falsely claiming.

 

Best wishes and hope you get your answers xx

[Nystagmite]

try the nice approach and ask her what are the plans of the child

 

Would it better to approach the child directly and ask?

[watchinginvestigation2011]

Yep if they see the kids. Mine are lucky their dad recently said he will support them to the hilt as in stay in education as long as you can.

[craiganthonyhill]

It depends on the age of the child, but the DWP will know if there working or not.

or you could ring them direct.