Joanne, I can only endorse everything Ell-enn has said. You are getting the best advice and if you do everything she says, you won't get to the worst case scenario. The only other advice I can give you is to start being strong. You are in control, not the lender. Yes they might threaten legal action etc, but you have more power in this process than you realise! You are doing everything right. Stop stressing, deal with letters as you get them calmly, don't panic! I know its hard but try to keep emotions out of it and deal with it pragmatically. The more you try to do this, the better you will feel! I used to work for a lender, I know how this works and believe me you are a very very very long way away from losing your home. Stay strong!