Thanks for the link. i have no evidence of the split no lawyers were involved due to no money to afford the divorce & after years went by it was just something that was left. My only evidence to being single is me paying all the bills / mortgage etc & they are in my name & him not being on the council tax as he doesn’t live here permanently or contribute to the day to day running of my household. He is at my house frequently due to my son being asd / autistic & gets too much for one person to deal with 24/7. we celebrate my sons & daughters birthday (not his) together as a family because we are being the bigger people for the sake of the children but we lead separate lives.

It’s on this group I read about someone having to pay back money because their ex had mail to their address. I don’t deal well in these situations especially when I’ve been living like this since 2008 then all of a sudden this! Really worried they’ll look all the way back to 2008 & expect me to pay all those years back. I know I’m probably panicking but everything goes round your head! Is there anyone on here that can give advice from a Professional point of view ..... CAB / HMRC ? Or someone had similar circumstances? ive worked so hard to keep a roof over our head with the added pressure of my sons condition / my exes problems & my own mental health issues whilst still holding down a job.

HELP!! I am worried sick! I received a letter from tax credits yesterday asking for bank statements/ annual mortgage statement / gas/electricity/phone bills etc for periods 6/4/2019 to 6/7/2019. My ex & I split up in 2008 after a letter from csa asking for child support for a child i knew nothing about. Since then I have been living alone with my 2 children. ( 1 child not his) My son has adhd and high functioning anxiety and just last year finally been diagnosed with ASD. I have my own mental health problems so he has been on hand to help with my son. More so the past few years as my son has gotten older with his high functioning anxiety/ lack of going to bed & finally diagnosed with ASD. Things have been amicable between us considering the circumstances we split up but he is a caring father who does provide & help out with his son. After our split my ex went off the rails and is a gambler & has a bad social drug habit. My parents have had to bail him out of his gambling / drug debt ( for the sake of our son ) so it was agreed all These years ago to ensure my son & the other child were provided for & to pay my parents back , that his wage would still be paid into the joint account & I made sure I got the maintenance payment for my son & paid the maintenance to the other child ( so money wasn’t gambled / snorted away ! ). This is where I am terrified they think we are living as a couple and I will need to pay back any tax credits because there is a joint account with his wages being paid into! I go every month to the bank & take out the lump sum of what is left of his wages ( after the 2 maintenance & money owed to my parents ) & give that to him To do what he wishes with. I pay my mortgage / electric / gas/ phone / council tax with my own pay & are all in my name. The only thing that makes us look like a couple are his wages going into a joint account (for reasons I’ve explained) and the car insurance being in his name ( for cheaper & he does use it for my son ) . He pays the car as maintenance for my son as he can’t cope with public transport / people looking at him due to his anxiety / asd (car is in my name ) ex does use the car when taking my son out as we can’t get him out otherwise. I’ve claimed all this time & now getting a letter like this I am absolutely terrified they will stop my payments & expect me to pay back all the tax credits I have had all these years!!! Why have they asked for just these months ??? I’m also more worried because I work closely with HMRC In my job, what if the end up prosecuting me if they dont believe we aren’t a couple with the joint account?!?! I’d lose my job too ! I’ve read on here they didn’t believe a few people they were single because mail was being sent to their address so they hardly going to believe me if I have a joint account when in fact there is a legitimate reason for this. I have no proof he stays elsewhere either because he stays between the new lady in his life at the time / his mums when speaking to her/ mates houses. Any help / advice ?? I suffer with bad anxiety too so this has currently sent it into overdrive which my son picks up on & makes him worse too !