It's only if they decide it's malicious I could be disciplined. Today I had a meeting with the office manager to investigate my claims with only 30 minutes notice! Apparently my brother (who is going to chair the grievance hearing) told her that what happened out of work ie.the phone call between my sister and husband are not relevant to the bullying claim and won't be considered!! The whole point of the grievance is based on the call. Surely bullying/harassment can happen anywhere. How can my sister discipline me when she's made it clear she wants me out the business. I think my sister has told my brother to say this but may be wrong. The office manager has also been told by my sister to get dates/times of the incidents. I told her that as it's persistant and ongoing I don't have specific dates. I wonder what Monday will bring.......................................

Right - I now have a letter about my grievance. It says my brother is to chair the grievance hearing although he's not been asked/told yet. The office manager is to hold the investigation into my allegations - the letter says I have to prove my claim of bullying with dates/times etc. If the grievance is found to be malicious it will be classed as misconduct and I will be disciplined for that which could result in my dismissal. Once this grievance hearing has been held, depending on the outcome, my disciplinary hearing will be rescheduled where I could be dismissed. I feel I'm banging my head against a brick wall. All I want is an impartial hearing which I don't think I'm going to get. I may sound paranoid but everyone involved in this grievance (investigator, chairperson, witnesses) are employed by my dad. He is on record as saying he's given my sister executive powers and whatever she says goes basically. No-one is wanting to cross her in case she turns on them next so how can any of this be impartial. I don't know what to do now. I feel like jacking it in and telling them where to shove their job but financially that would be suicide. Oh to be so hated!

The hearing has been postponed. I put a grievance in for bullying by my sister and the fact she told my husband the were trying to make me leave. I got a letter today saying its postponed until the grievance is dealt with. My brother made 2 mistakes at work today. I've kept a note of them too, if they discipline me for mistakes then surely they've got to do the same to others making mistakes. Is this a good sign? How can she discipline me if she's made it clear she wants me out the business?

I handed a letter in today disputing all allegations. I suppose it won't do any good but I feel I need to do something. The lawyer I spoke to was lovely on the phone but charges £180 an hour if I want to use him - money I just don't have. I'm only allowed to take a colleague or a union rep in with me but I'm not in a union and my colleagues are obviously looking out for their own jobs and some are influenced by my father so probably don't want to get involved. I feel so low - I've felt physically sick all day and have hardly slept since I got the letters. I am the main wage earner and feel I'm letting my husband and children down - especially as I thought I was in a relatively secure job for life. All I can do is sit it out and see what happens..........................

I spoke to a solicitor yesterday and he says it sounds like they're trying to get to get rid of me. I don't know if this will be classed as unfair dismissal which at least would hopefully award me some money to keep me going for a while. Basically this is a family feud. I was told in writing in October that the title of director is separate from my employee status. I'm just incredibly worried about my potential lack of earnings. Last night I was awake most of the night trying to figure out how we can manage without my salary if they do sack me in 2 weeks time which is when the "impartial" hearing is. I think because I'm already on a final warning they can get me out the business fairly easily. My sister thinks she's very clever - because she got a degree in accountancy while my brother and I entered the family firm. She seems to be following the ACAS guidelines but skewed in her favour! She honestly thinks everything is being done by the book. She seems to forget the "conversation" her and my husband had in December where she said they were trying to get rid of me. I thought it was said in anger but she must have meant it.

I posted a while back about work problems. Basically I'm a director in my fathers business with a 10% shareholding and my brother who also works there has 10% too. My father holds the remaining 80%. My sister who doesn't work in the family business comes in once or twice a week to advise on the finances - she works full time elsewhere as an accountant. My sisters boyfriend also works in the company. I don't get along with my sister or my Dad. It worsened after my Mum died a year ago. She also worked in the family business but kept my Dad off my back. They disciplined me in October because I used my company car to travel to a second job (p/t bar work). They called it gross misconduct and I got a final warning (my first ever disciplinary/warning) and their decision was upheld on appeal. My father chaired the disciplinary and the appeal! I have kept my nose clean (I thought) since then. My father threatened me with redundancy before Christmas but I threatened him with court and he backed down. My sister and my husband had a heated phone conversation after this and she told him that they hated me and were trying to make me leave. I have told my Dad I'll leave if/when I can find another job but there's not a lot out there at the moment. Yesterday I was given 2 letters inviting me to another 2 disciplinary hearings. One is for competence - they have kept a list of every minor mistake I have made at work for the past 6 months. The list includes stacking things differently to them, putting invoices in the wrong tray etc. The second hearing is because a friend came in, I did a job for him and paid for it myself because I owed him a favour. I paid the full price - we have a price list at the till and I followed that but apparently I should have asked my sisters boyfriend to confirm the price. Bear in mind I have worked there for 20 + years and her boyfriend has been there for 2 years. He obviously knows whats happening - he must be the one telling my sister when I make "mistakes". Over the past year I have had any responsibility taken from me. I am not allowed access to computers, filing cabinets, safe, accounts etc. anymore. The boyfriend constantly makes sly remarks to me and puts me down as does my father and sister. If I'm told one more time everyone hates me I'll begin to believe it -lol. I think they're going to sack me this time. My sister is chairing the disciplinary hearing this time despite the fact she's not employed by the company - my father has announced he's made her a manager and everything she does is done with his blessing. I am going to submit a grievance on Monday about bullying by my father, sister and her boyfriend despite the fact it's my father as managing director who will deal with it. If I get sacked do you think I'll have a case for unfair dismissal? I am the only person the company has ever disciplined despite other people making mistakes. I'm panicking a bit because my wage is needed to pay my mortgage etc. I have 2 children who my Dad sees regularly - he collects them from my house and drops them off again without getting out of his car. My Dad knows we rely on my wage. I don't understand why he's potentially risking the roof over his only grandchildrens heads. Sorry for the long post!

We do similar jobs. We earn the same amount. He doesn't get pay rises either but never says anything. My father and him get on really well. I was my mums obvious favourite and I think my father and sister resented it which is why they're now acting this way.

Hi Sorry this is so long............ I work in my families small business - it's my fathers business but is a limited company. I have been there for 25 years. I am a director and shareholder of the company along with my father and brother. My father owns 80% of the shareholding with my brother and I having 10% each. There are 4 other employees. We have a sister who has never worked for the business. My mother also worked for the company but died a year ago. I have never got on with my father. When my mother was alive she acted as a buffer between us so things were ok but since she died work is unbearable. My father is a bully - he constantly tells me I'm useless and that everyone hates me. He has phoned my partner on occasion to tell him how terrible I am at work and how no-one likes me. My brother likes to sit on the fence and not get involved so I deal with everything on my own. Now my sister has got involved with the company and things are even worse. She works full time for another company but has decided to become involved in the family business and comes in 2-3 times a week while she's meant to be working from home. She is not paid for this. My father has decided he's ready to retire in the next year or so and has decided to give her "executive powers" so basically she thinks she's in charge (and can do as she likes with his blessing). She has recently given us all contracts which we have never had before and has changed lots of our implied terms and conditions. She has also introduced a staff handbook which is copied from her own companies handbook. There are references to line managers etc. which we obviously don't have in such a small business. I have had no pay rises for the past 6 years. I was struggling to pay bills etc. as the cost of living has risen but my wages haven't so I have taken on part time bar work. I have a company car which I have always had for personal use. She saw my car parked outside the pub I'm working in and decided I could not use the car to get to and from my second job and phoned the insurance company to tell them not to cover the vehicle for commuting to a second job. She also threatened to put a tracker on the car. My father has apparently agreed to this. I carried on using my car anyway and when she saw it parked outside the pub again she came in to check I was working then the next day at work I was handed a letter inviting me to a disciplinary hearing for gross misconduct. I had my car key taken from me for the two weekends I would have worked before the hearing took place. She was the witness and my father chaired the hearing! This happened a few weeks ago. I got a final written warning. I appealed - again to my father - and not surprisingly my appeal was turned down. I have spoken to them about the contract changes and they asked me to put in writing anything I disagreed with. I did this two weeks ago and also wrote on the letter to treat this as a formal grievance. I have had no response to the letter. My other issue is I think they have put a tracker on my car. They did have access to my car for the two weekends they kept my keys. Twice recently I have been out socially in the same general area of the pub I work in and my sister has just happened to walk past. She doesn't come in or talk to me. My friends saw her coming last night before I did and said she was checking all the bars on the street. She lives about 5 miles away from there and didn't seem to be going anywhere specific. Is it legal to use a tracker without informing me? I am so fed up and majorly stressed and I'm looking for another job but can't afford to leave the family business until I get one. I can't keep working there in these conditions indefinately when it's so obvious they want rid of me. Incidentally I have made loads of new friends at the pub I'm working in and everyone seems to like me so I can't be that bad to work with!! Unfortunately it only pays minimum wage and there's no possibility of full time work there at the moment.