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    • A claim, or as the claims company have advised me, a product information request was supposedly submitted to Barclays in May of this year.....to date I have not had any acknowledgement from Barclays and more worryingly when I have rung Barclays PPI helpline who were very helpful, been told they have no record of anything lodged in any format...Should I be concerned that the claims company have not actually submitted anything or is it normal to have no standard letter from the bank?     
    • In this type of managed block most of the owners/tenants have other places elsewhwere and only use them occasionally so the concierge service have keys to ensure the smooth running of the block. Now I would be tempted to fit an old fashioned lock as well as the swipe pass if you are there all fo the time (subject to any necessary permissions). after all, it is for your convenience, not theirs
    • No-one can represent you as far as the debt liability goes so the CAB might have given your creditors a sob strory but that is not a representation by you so means nothing as far as the SB clock goes. My mum could admit that I owe money to a creditor and offer to pay but there is no relationship between her and the creditor so whatever she said or did wouldnt chaneg that. Now bailiffs like to pile on the guilt in trying to get relative to cough up for debts that arent theirs but they dont get paid otherwise.
    • Well, if they're living and working then they wouldn't be taking any state benefits surely?  So I dont see any issue.   Of course, the universal wage for all would eradicate any ill feeling towards people, and this constant narrative that someone is taking something from someone.  That's my real issue with capitalism if we move on slightly - we're all on different levels of the pyramid and most people are constantly looking over their shoulder at what the person next to them has.  Tory's talk about labour indulging in the politics of envy, but it's actually the capitalist free market system they have created which fuels this hatred towards other people.  I think that capitalism promotes competition and as such envy plays a big role in every one of us because we're all competing with one another...  better house, better car, better this and that.   Ask yourself if you'd be worried about an immigrant taking what you perceive to be yours by rights if there wasn't a more level playing field and people were treated equally regardless of where they were born/skin colour/gender etc?  People can't seriously be happy living like this.. constantly mistrusting, looking over your shoulder, paranoid, angry...
    • Could be a conflict of interest but if a family owned co you are not likely to get anyone else. can be someone of the same level. in all my years involved in union activity I have never met a licensed union chairman so mehtinks that you would be better off seeking independent advice or speak to the current branch officers of the union that has recognition/representation . If the confusion shown in your posts is translated into the workplace grievance procedures you may well end up worse off than with a simple and coherent presentation of your case so get someone else to be with you, ideally someone with the authority to actually represent you or the managers will fiond it difficult to undershatnd what it is you want
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sorry for the log post- I haven’t eaten or slept in 2 days!! 

I am super ventilating here and stressing out of my head ...

I buy clothes frequently from one major retailer store

( I will not name it for protection reasons, honestly I feel like the whole world is watching right now and FBI will come to my house any sec!!  

Oh I feel sick only writing this thread...

I think a docs visit is needed,

I do have serious anxiety after a cancer scare last year that left me mortified at the fragility of life...

yet here I am risking my freedom for something really stupid!!

 

I have serious issues with trolling around shops, buying clothes I never wear,

I take labels off, put them in my wardrobe in the event that I will wear them one day...

then decide not so and foolishly justify in my head that I can swap labels and match values and it's definitely NOT with the intent to swap cheaper items, so not for a financial gain-  all clothes are from this one shop, not done this anywhere else.

 

I can't eat or sleep or think, my anxiety is through the roof and all the cousnelling I did 6 m ago it's been wiped in a few days!!!

So please no judgement. I see now the naivity of it all and it’s been the best wake up call of my life....

Emotions aside, actual facts:

 

I went this store a few days ago to do two returns ( I know 2 at the same time!!) and I was in a rush to get to my children school on time.

On my way to tills I saw a dress I liked picked 2 sizes up to go and try on but thought I will do the refund first then try the dresses if I have time.

I mentioned this to the lady at the till, she processed the first refund ( stupidly I had 2 refunds paid on 2 diff cards, not on purpose I swear!! I just loose, misplace my cards all the time...).

 

On the second refund she said she needed to check something and called a manager.

This happened  in the past too and was all ok so didn’t worry.

But the manager didn't come for a while so she said oh I better go and find them, but took the clothes and the receipt with her.  

As I was waiting, another assistant came to the till to serve someone else, s

I said I am in a rush, is it ok to go and try these dresses on while my return is being checked, she said ok!

At that point I had no clue.

 

as walking to try the dresses, panic set in and it hit me:

what if I get stopped and questioned

(what if I did attach wrong labels and will they check it, I was panicking and doubting myself, actually I am most certain now I did for one of them...).  

 

Looked at the time and I thought this would be really bad if I get stopped and I don’t get to school on time for my kids … 

security/police would not care,

would have to call husband etc so it was a split second reaction and thought to just leave the shop instead!!

 put the dresses back on a rack, and just walked out and drove away.

 

The items to be refunded were still with the lady assistant so did NOT have a refund on them.

I was not stopped by security, no police or anything. 

Got to the car and drove away.

 

Panic set in, I was literally shaking...

what if me leaving incriminated me?

to make it less suspicious I rang the shop and spoke to an assistant and said I had to rush for school because I was waiting for a while and will come back maybe later

( after kids afterschool classes) or the next day.

 

She said she didn't know of my refund and asked if I wanted to speak to a manager I said ok,

manager had no clue either and didn't seem bothered,

I said I might not be able to come back until later or tomorrow in which case he said that's ok but he can't guarantee the safety of the items left or any responsibility,

I said ok, I am fine with that.

What do I do now????

 

Am I being paranoid?

have I incriminated myself?

Is this likely to be checked?

Or they think I am just a scatty person, etc (which I actually am)…

 

Scenario 1 - They might be oblivious to all this and nothing to worry, just me overthinking it because I know I am guilty!!

Forget about it, not been ‘caught’, arrested etc  and live with it. They might have put me on the look out/ blacklist to stop me/ ban me next time and it's a matter of wait and see because nothing actually happened but .......this option is KILLING me ….

 

I would rather go and own up?

Is that wise?

Should I look for legal advice already?

Get a solicitor and explain all this, it could be less damaging if I admit all willingly before they ‘catch’ me and apologise and offer to pay any liabilities

… just not want police or courts involved.

I feel I need to do SOMETHING!!

 

Should I go back, and say

‘”hey came back for my things I left in a hurry, can I grab them,

I have more time today and need to try those dresses I saw last time,

I’ll have a look around the shop first, and do the refund when I pay later? “

 

But not do any of that, just slowly make my way to the door and actually leave and never set foot in the shop again??

This would be a lucky escape if not stopped.

 

OR Should I ring up and say- “

hey ab that refund sorry I am going on holiday tomorrow for 2 weeks and won’t have time to pop by,

if you can keep them fine if not I am happy to discard the items,

or put them to a charity etc”…

(they sometimes have a box to bring in old clothes…)

( items left are only £35 value ). I

n this case they still keep the items so they have the proof

 - another lie I know, but maybe of way of getting out. from having them keep the items...

 

Scenario 2 - They picked on it and I was going to be stopped anyway.

Me leaving the returns behind made it worse and more suspicious.

 

Are they likely to be investigating right now?

And report to police?

They will probably find evidence as they have the receipt and the cctv

(Shop has clear CCTV apparently and a good prevention loss team in place from what I read on these threads),

 

if they search by card probably find 3-4 returns in the last 6 months,

cannot say for sure if legit or not,

but I understand you only need 2 offences.

 

Can they do anything provided I just left these items and not had an actual refund on this occasion?

 

If they take action what’s likely to happen?

When and what first, will police come to my house, etc?

Is it better to go and fess up- 

 

Scenario 3 -

GO in ask to speak to a manager and actually admit it??

I was returning the wrong items and realised it, panicked and left.

Obv no refund required.

 

What is the worst outcome from that, would they investigate further ??

Police squat coming down most likely…??

If I caused any financial loss I am happy to pay them anything!!

 

Just don't want the police involved or courts or a criminal record.

Are they likely to be reasonable like that?

 

Our best friend is a copper and if this comes out, the shame will be unbearable.

.. everyone knows him/us…or should trust and swallow my pride and talk to my copper friend and see what he says, is he legally obliged to report/ investigate if I do??

 

Pleeeease I would appreciate some advice asap... 

Yours Truly Scared

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I'm sure you're very stressed about all this but I don't really understand the story very well. It seems a bit garbled.

I gather that you may have substituted a label but I'm not sure whether you are saying that you achieved some financial benefit as a result.

What I do understand is that apparently nobody noticed – or at least nobody seemed to notice – and that you left the store as any ordinary shopper would.

If this is the situation then firstly I don't think that there is very much to worry about. On the other hand, you are obviously deeply troubled by this and maybe you should be – especially if you now realise that you have obtained some financial advantage.

You are asking whether you should speak with your police friend – and I would say probably that you shouldn't because that will put your friend in an awkward position and may also affect your future friendship with that person.

You are asking whether you should go back and see the manager – and frankly if you have achieved some financial benefit then that will be a very good idea. It will make you feel calmer and better about yourself – which is the most important thing. It would also establish your honesty in the matter with the manager and that is no bad thing.

It is impossible, in my view, for any shop which is faced with a customer which comes in to disclose that they made an error in the labelling of refund items, to then get up and start to take action against that person. I would imagine that they will see you as a remarkably honest person and that they wish they had more customers like that.

So that's my advice. Go in and see the manager, tell them what happened and refund them whatever money you believe that you may have gained.


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BankFodder - Sorry if all sounds too confusing,  to sum it up, went to do a refund, gave them the items and they went to check on them with a manager as he was not present, I got scared and left in case they were going to stop/ question arrest me.

I did NOT gain any financial benefit from it...or intended to do so, swapped for example trousers with other trousers...etc dress with other dress that would compare to the value, just as a way of getting rid of new items laying abut that I forgot to return.... In my head there was a justification, in reality is fraud !

 

Now I read all these threads about how serious the allegations can be (I honestly had no idea) , I know it all sounds and IS deeply disturbed and want to put it right, so thank you for your advice! Much appreciated!

 

Me going back, would they not see it as means of ' well you did it now so must have done it before, we need to call police and open a case to investigate further or previous transactions?'

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Have you talked to your therapist about what's driving you to do this?

 

Shoplifting can be connected with psychological problems, so I would be getting help to find out why you've been buying clothes you don't need and just putting them in the wardrobe.

 

Hopefully you and the therapist can figure out what's going on.

 

HB


Illegitimi non carborundum

 

 

 

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Hi HB, thanks for taking time to reply... defo psychological, had issues with parents leaving when young,  I am a bit of a hoarder, etc!

But never done any shoplifting, I have never even considered that as I know it's a crime black and white!! 

This label swapping somewhow was  justified in my head.

I now know better.

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You sound like an intelligent person to me, so I think you will know that if you continue doing the label swapping, it can only end badly. Getting help is the best thing for you. :)

 

HB


Illegitimi non carborundum

 

 

 

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Never again!

 

 If I don't go back and just leave it, do you think they might be on to it or suspecting anything? I am honestly not going to that shop ever again.

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It's impossible for us to know what they're thinking really, especially when we don't know which shop it is.

 

What do you think of BF's idea of going to talk to the manager if you want to do something proactive?

 

HB


Illegitimi non carborundum

 

 

 

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I am more than willing to do it and put it all behind me, but worried they might have no sympathy and call police and open a case to investigate further or previous transactions...

 

So really cannot know what they're thinking. I am even worried about giving the name of the shop in case they can track it here...

 

I think I read too many scary threads about cases where people got stopped on leaving the shop and how it was handled ( interviewd, arrested, taken to station).

Others got called by police for a statement weeks later.

 

 

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I don't think we've seen someone from here being interviewed by police weeks later, I could be wrong.

 

You could try doing a forum search of CAG [the white box in the top right of this screen, in the maroon strip] for the particular shop and see how they've handled other cases.

 

HB


Illegitimi non carborundum

 

 

 

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Posted (edited)

Yes that's what I have already done before writing for advice on here...

 

Someone was being suspected and had police coming to their home and searched their house...😔 Some ended up with cautions and  fines. Some in court cases.

 

All terrifying...

Edited by Scaredkat

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so you took some clothes back to a shop for a refund and then ran away without the refund.

Why would the police be remotely interested in that?

 

now looking at the attaching random labels to the clothing- why dont you leave the label on so if you want to try and return them you mkake everyone's life easier in being able to match the goods with the receipt, stock code etc. If the return is outside their usual no questions asked period you will usually get a credit note rather than a refund.

If you have a pile of clothes you want to return and a load of loose labels find the receipts and take them all back so the 3 things can be matched and your original purchase receipt altered to reflect the return. the worst they can do is say sorry it has been too long so no refund but be assured they get this quite often so wont judge you even if they cant accept the return.

 

is it you really feel guilty for spending money on stuff you know you are never going to wear and feel that someone will punish you for this ( or should)? it is your money so no, you wont be punished as you havent done anything to warrant it. If you want to change your behaviour them you need to speak to a psychologist who specialises in this area but stop beating yourself up with worry, you dont have a brand on your forehead that will allow people to point and say "there goes the person who couldnt find the right sales tag". no one knows and no-oe will be wanting to know

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52 minutes ago, ericsbrother said:
52 minutes ago, ericsbrother said:

you took some clothes back to a shop for a refund and then ran away without the refund.

Why would the police be remotely interested in that?

 

 

This is my worry that they will investigate on it so might be summoned to police anyway.

What shall I do???

I can still go back and own up to it say i made a mistake etc... What is the worst case scenario if I do?

Should I take a solicitor with me?

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I think the problem is that the regular posters here haven't done what you've done. We don't judge, but we don't have the same experience.

 

For me, I'm not sure what a solicitor could do to help because I imagine most of them don't know about shoplifting law. Plus it might be over the top and the shop could ask if, when you can afford a lawyer, you need to take clothes from the shop.

 

If I may, I think you're going off on a panic attack over this and you need to concentrate on your family. I would give it a bit of time, talk to your therapist and then in the fullness of time make an informed decision on what to do.

 

HB


Illegitimi non carborundum

 

 

 

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ive spaced post 1 a wee bit better so the story makes sense.

 

simple answer ..FORGET ABOUT IT.

 

police have never been involved in these 'events' and never cant be

no-one has lost out anyway.

please go back and see your doctor etc etc.

 

 


PLEASE DONT HIT QUOTE IF THE LAST POST IS THE ONE YOU ARE REPLYING TOO.

MAKES A THREAD TWICE AS LONG TO SCROLL THROUGH!

please do not post jpg images directly to a topic..USE PDF ....READ UPLOAD.

 

WE CAN'T GIVE ADVICE BY PM - IF YOU SEND ME A LINK TO YOUR THREAD - I WILL BE HAPPY TO OFFER HELP THERE

Single Premium PPI Q&A Read Here

Reclaim mis-sold PPI Read Here

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Thank you so much for all your messages! 

HB indeed I think you are right and your advice is very sensible. I have been having a terrible panic attack earlier, so been focusing on calming down for now.

 

Dx100uk you made me feel better by saying to forget about it. I will try and do so  for now until I can think rational again!

 

I will make amends for sure, starting with my doctors next week.

And decluttering and donating all those unwanted clothes to a womens refuge centre or charity.  

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Anyone knows how to message someone privately on here pls? 

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you cant only siteteam.

 

but you don't need too

follow my last post to the letter

and when you have done that..do the same again.:rockon:

 

dx


PLEASE DONT HIT QUOTE IF THE LAST POST IS THE ONE YOU ARE REPLYING TOO.

MAKES A THREAD TWICE AS LONG TO SCROLL THROUGH!

please do not post jpg images directly to a topic..USE PDF ....READ UPLOAD.

 

WE CAN'T GIVE ADVICE BY PM - IF YOU SEND ME A LINK TO YOUR THREAD - I WILL BE HAPPY TO OFFER HELP THERE

Single Premium PPI Q&A Read Here

Reclaim mis-sold PPI Read Here

Reclaim Bank Account, Loan & Credit Card Charges Read Here

The CAG Interest Tutorial Read Here

spreadsheets 

 

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Posted (edited)

Hi, new to this group and need some sound advice please.

 

I've just realised I have been doing some major stupid mistakes which I never gave too much thought:

 

I shop in tkmaxx a lot but also return a lot of items, always to the same shop, giving my correct details, so never intended to deceive on purpose, just been incredibly naive!!

 

As there is a major issue with tkm labeling and product description ( labels always fall off, description says 'modbox, no other label present except for the price one')  I might have returned items with the wrong tags or even wrong items on numerous occasions. This was not intended for any financial gain, my justification was swapping other brand new items that I did not refund on time from tkm or other shops ( small value items for personal use).

 

Question is I think they are on to me now?!

I was not stopped last time in store but noticed the assistant checked with a manager and put the items aside in a cupboard.

 

I might be paranoid, I really do not know.

 

So I have since googled about tkm returns and came across lots of scary posts on here which have terrified me and gave me the reality check I needed.

 

Please no judgement, I am dealing with my own demons already regarding all this (counselling, mental issues etc).

I am truly regretful and realise my naivity and the severity of it.

 

Needless to say I will not set foot in the shop again!!! Or ever do any of sorts!!

 

So, if they are on to me how long will it take to investigate? I read that you need 2 accounts and they will most likely find more than that over the course of the years. How far would they search, months, years? And on what criteria, by name or card number? 

Will they send police to my door or will police ring to call me to station?

 

I am trying to compile all this data myself from my bank accounts to asses figures and also what to do?

 

Ideally I want the whole nightmare to end and would like to confess to it all and pay my pennance.

 

If I chose to go and speak with the manager and beg not to involve police, how likely is that? I am willing to admit to anything they find and pay back any money needed if it caused any financial damages. Do they have to send it to police or court regardless?? 

 

I have nightmares of them making a showcase of me and have my name scattered in papers!!

 

Please help, I need some guidance! 

 

@maxxer I noticed you have a lot of expertise and would appreciate your input even though you probably despise people like me :(

Edited by Stupidmistake11

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I have since googled about tkm returns and came across lots of scary posts on here

 

there are NO scary posts on CAG at all..we tell the truth..forget about it all..

 

Will they send police to my door or will police ring to call me to station?

 

nope....

 

please be aware that quite rightly that @maxxer will tow the company line and we whole heartedly agree with that portrayal...

but 

 

you don't need to fess up to anyone bar going to see your doctor...

 

 


PLEASE DONT HIT QUOTE IF THE LAST POST IS THE ONE YOU ARE REPLYING TOO.

MAKES A THREAD TWICE AS LONG TO SCROLL THROUGH!

please do not post jpg images directly to a topic..USE PDF ....READ UPLOAD.

 

WE CAN'T GIVE ADVICE BY PM - IF YOU SEND ME A LINK TO YOUR THREAD - I WILL BE HAPPY TO OFFER HELP THERE

Single Premium PPI Q&A Read Here

Reclaim mis-sold PPI Read Here

Reclaim Bank Account, Loan & Credit Card Charges Read Here

The CAG Interest Tutorial Read Here

spreadsheets 

 

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Posted (edited)

Sorry ab this, I am actually in an absolute state and rightfully so!

I am desperate to make the thoughts in my head stop, hence this second posting where I can name the shop...was not meant to deceive or anything, I was more scared the minute details will pinpoint straight to me!!

 

I think if I go in and admit it now might be easier for me... with whatever is coming my way.

 

I am ringing doctors today as this spiralled me into a complete depressive state of mind and not able to function since...

 

Edited by Stupidmistake11

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why would they be interested in the fact that you are owwed some money by the shop but didnt wait to collect it.

 

This is the nub of it, you havent done anything wrong and leaving without sorting out the refund has only put you out of pocket

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Ericsbrother

"why would they be interested in the fact that you are owwed some money by the shop but didnt wait to collect it."

 

If they were suspecting anything at the time of refund, and l left without one, does that not definitely make it suspicious and make them think to look into it?

 

For some reason I was so naive to think as long as all the items are new, a label here or there does not matter, I was still returning something of a similar value. 

 

As mentioned already I do not want the items back or ever go there again but just waiting for it to see how it goes is soul destroying...(seeing docs today so hope that helps)

 

 

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why would they suspect anything at the time, they have hundreds of people asking for refunds/exchanges every day. My wife returned an article to a store that has a 14 day returns policy about 2 months after the purchase and they didnt bat an eyelid.

you failed to sort out the receipts and labels- so what? they can chack their stock and sales for that item. If you do pluck up the courage to go back to sort this out then take all of the unwanted items, tags and receipts in one go to make the job easier.

 

No one thinks bad of you, the store staff dont know  you from Adam and youhavent done anything wrong.

As you know, this is all a problem i your mind and is caused by currently wanting to find a reason to justify your actions.

You panicked, it is that simple. It is not wrong to suffer a panic attack but in your current state of mind you fell as though you should be punished because you have bought stuff on impulse or as part of a compulsive behaviour pattern.

Get help with that and you may well have the courage to ask for your stuff/money back, It is still yours

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Are you getting help for the obvious anxiety you are suffering? Although you may think it’s just how you are, anxiety can be treated successfully.  If you find are often acting impulsively, I’d ask your GP about that too.

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