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Daughters Debts


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Probably a common story

 

my daughter is over twenty thousand pounds in debt,

lived with a bloke who made promises after promise,

had a child with him

then finally saw the light

but had kept mum & dad in the dark as it was too embarrasing so too late.

She organised a dmp with step change

 

now lloyds are saying their agreement only lasted six months, and want to increase her payments,

she earns just over 16k before tax but rent is 695.00 food etc on top

so bank of mum and dad have stepped in to buy food and clothes.

 

told my wife and I to take custody of her daughter

now I feel I must step in and see what if anything I can do,

 

not impressed with Lloyds because they are threatening baliffs etc,

but she owns nothing,

tv in her house is a loner from me,

bike she rides to work is her sisters,

no sky etc,

laptop loaner as well.

 

they just do not seem to comprehend you can not get blood from a stone.

 

She works believe it or not for an fca company and states if she gets a ccj etc she will lose her job which is why she did a dip.

 

Can any one advise me what I could do for her,

I was going to write to Lloyds and say you are causing her extreme distress

and can not get blood from a stone but feel sure there must be someithing more formal I could write.

 

They are aware of her circumstances and frankly I feel that they trapped her into this cycle by offering overdrafts to pay loans they knew she could not afford.

 

it is not the banks fault however,

it is the waste of space she called a boyfriend

who sat on his arse whilst I helped pay the rent etc

even after his child was born,

not going to see her homeless after all.

 

She was an idiot to fall for his lies

but now I have to try and fix things as best I can so any advise would be welcome. :mad2::mad2::mad2:

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Firstly, have a look at the regulations here in CONC http://www.consumeractiongroup.co.uk/forum/showthread.php?426145-CONC-7.12-Lenders-responsibilities-in-relation-to-debt-including-DMPs which forbid a creditor to break ranks with other creditors when there is a DMP in place.

 

However, you say that Lloyds are claiming that an agreement was only in place for six months. Please could you post up the agreement in PDF format here. On previous experience, it is likely that there has been no time limit put in place and they are simply now saying that it was intended be six months. If that is the case, then you are in a good position to challenge Lloyds who are just being nasty and dishonest about the whole thing – which is completely in keeping with their character anyway.

 

In terms of her general indebtedness, either you will be a good idea if you laid out everything that is happening. All of her debts and we can start to have a look at them.

 

How closely have you analysed them all? Have you checked for PPI? Have you checked for charges? Have you requested CCA agreements?

 

It may be that if this is all looked at closely, you may be able to reduce the figure.

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If you could provide a breakdown of the debts...what type of debt with which Creditor/DCA and a balance then we can advice on how to deal with each.

 

Regards

 

Andy

We could do with some help from you.

PLEASE HELP US TO KEEP THIS SITE RUNNING EVERY POUND DONATED WILL HELP US TO KEEP HELPING OTHERS

 

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Thank you for this help,

 

as you will appreciate it has taken six months for her to reveal the level of her debt so I am taking things slowly,

 

her mother and I lent her thousands to pay rent etc and thought by doing so her bills were being paid

turns out they were living off credit cards etc, even with our money helping out.

 

She was that brainwashed

she even blamed me for the level of debt because I refused to lend (give) her any money at one point as he sat on his lazy arse in bed and thus started her down the path of being in debt.

 

I will speak to her and see if she will tell me everything but will start with the pages you have highlighted

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Are the debts in her name or his?

Any advice i give is my own and is based solely on personal experience. If in any doubt about a situation , please contact a certified legal representative or debt counsellor..

 

 

If my advice helps you, click the star icon at the bottom of my post and feel free to say thanks

:D

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they are in her name

she was the one working but like a mug paid his bills his rent arrears etc

 

 

then went on the joint tenancy and been told she is liable for this debt as well,

 

 

as I say the picture is becoming clearer and clearer

but still hidden behind the cloud of she does not want us to know just how stupid she has been

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We could do with some help from you.

PLEASE HELP US TO KEEP THIS SITE RUNNING EVERY POUND DONATED WILL HELP US TO KEEP HELPING OTHERS

 

 Have we helped you ...?         Please Donate button to the Consumer Action Group The National Consumer Service

 

If you want advice on your Topic please PM me a link to your thread

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Thanks for that Andy, j

 

 

ust so you know with the Eon issue she did not want me involved so had to back off,

 

 

she is an emotional wreck as I said being treated by doctors,

 

 

never know what I do is right or wrong

but this time she has asked for my help

so hoping this is the kink in the armour for me to find out the whole truth and start getting her back on track and not making excuses for her useless ex.

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Plenty been there in the same position...it is embarrassing....but there is only one road out......time to sort matters out.

We could do with some help from you.

PLEASE HELP US TO KEEP THIS SITE RUNNING EVERY POUND DONATED WILL HELP US TO KEEP HELPING OTHERS

 

 Have we helped you ...?         Please Donate button to the Consumer Action Group The National Consumer Service

 

If you want advice on your Topic please PM me a link to your thread

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might be worthy to send an sar to Lloyds too.

 

 

get all the statements etc

as BF pointed too

I bet there £1000's to reclaim here knowing Lloyds

 

 

just to put you mind at ease on one point.

 

 

Lloyds cant 'just' send in the bailiffs

you are probably confusing them with Debt collection agencies?

they are totally powerless.

please don't hit Quote...just type we know what we said earlier..

DCA's view debtors as suckers, marks and mugs

NO DCA has ANY legal powers whatsoever on ANY debt no matter what it's Type

and they

are NOT and can NEVER  be BAILIFFS. even if a debt has been to court..

If everyone stopped blindly paying DCA's Tomorrow, their industry would collapse overnight... 

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Thank you funnily enough just written SAR request for Lloyds as I have had to use one before and the forum pointed me to templates,

 

 

got to say this forum is a cracking place to research these matters,

thank you agin for the advice,

 

 

I have sat back long enough now hopefully can push through get all the other information then between the forum and myself start claiming back charges etc to of set her debt.

 

Thanks to every one who has replied already or will in the future

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get all the info you can from every source

 

don't forget her credit file too..

 

then its time to act.

 

but not before you know the arrows in your basket.

 

dx

please don't hit Quote...just type we know what we said earlier..

DCA's view debtors as suckers, marks and mugs

NO DCA has ANY legal powers whatsoever on ANY debt no matter what it's Type

and they

are NOT and can NEVER  be BAILIFFS. even if a debt has been to court..

If everyone stopped blindly paying DCA's Tomorrow, their industry would collapse overnight... 

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We don't offer advice on emotional problems here – were not qualified to do so. However, maybe if you tried to involve your daughter by at least getting her to follow this thread and to be there or to make suggestions while you are posting, this might start to help her feel that she was joining you in taking control of things and that might be very helpful to her.

 

I assume that the boyfriend has gone now – correct?

 

Also, I suddenly realise the DMP has been organised with Step Change. Have you been back to them to tell them that Lloyds are breaking ranks?

 

I think you should start to put pressure on Lloyds and get step change to contact them and asked them what the hell is going on. At the same time I would write Lloyds very strict letter pointing out to them that there is a DMP and that they are breaking ranks and that under CONC, they are prohibited from doing so. I would write the letter to Lloyds in the form of a formal complaint and tell that if they do not stop then you want the matter to go to the ombudsman within eight weeks.

 

Of course, it will be helpful if you can get the Lloyds agreement first and I would have thought that a visit to step change will produce it because they are bound to have it on file. That will save you the trouble of waiting 40 days for the SAR – although the SAR must be sent off in any event.

 

See step change, get their help, get the agreement – and also you could usefully step change for copies of everything they hold in respect of all of the debts. Step change are very good, but they won't do anything about helping you to track down charges, CCA agreements et cetera. We will help you to do that.

 

Get your daughter to start following the thread and to discuss it with you. I think you will find that she will benefit from it

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  • 4 weeks later...

BankFodder - thnak you for your comments and my apologies that I have not replied or acknowledged you until now, did not get a notification anyone else had replied so my apologies, in answer to your questions,

 

a) my daughter is finally coming around but was abused by a neighbour as a child and was kept silent because he told her I would go to jail if I attacked him, which to be honest, I would glady have done time for, if I had known I would have killed him, thats why she is so secretive with me because this latest sh1t is not much higher on the **** bag chain but she is damaged goods and he knew it, I have to very very careful otherwise she spooks and withdraws and gets in more of a mess, just phoned to say that the ex never picked up their daughter this weeken, nor paid maintance and could we bail her out which we will do but such a mess.

 

b) Stepchange said they would reduce other payments because of Lloyds but they have not spoken to them

 

c) I will speak to my daughter and ask her to authorise me to speak to Stepchange in order for me to to find out more

 

Two questions of my own what is CONC ? Secondly, she has recieved a letter from a debt collectors who are managing her debt on behalf of Tesco's credit cards offering a 50% off early settlement which is still nearly 900.00 GBP, as always bank of mum and dad are thinking of paying it to relive some pressure on her but do you think we could offer even less ?

 

Just seen your earlier notice about CONC so no need to explain my apologies, have left this matter until SAR was replied to, but the reality is as you have stated need to know everything and get it sorted.

 

Does anyone know the address I should use to send a SAR request for Barclays

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I'm not comfortable to hear that Step Change seem to be suggesting that they will modify the rest of the DMP to suit Lloyds demand for a varied regime of payments. Step change are far more expert than me, of course, but on the other hand I don't understand why all the other creditors should be compromised for the sake of Lloyds who are clearly bound by the law under and I don't see why you should give into them. I would speak to step change very carefully about this and find out why they're doing it before you allow them to go ahead. Hopefully it's not too late. If you allow Lloyds to vary the terms then they will be able to implement a new agreement which will be binding and which may contain various constraints such as six monthly reviews, increased instalments et cetera.

 

 

 

I'm sorry to hear about your daughter's situation. Have you been to the police?

It seems to me that if the police were involved – and I would expect that in today's climate they would be sensitive and considerate about the way they handled things, your sister might then get professional medical help that she seems to need. Apart from anything else, if she had relevant reports then I think that this would stop Lloyds and others in their tracks.

 

I don't think that we have suggested it here yet but if your daughter is in this state and is £20,000 in debt, then it is pretty unlikely that the money will ever be repaid. Have you considered bankruptcy? For someone in your daughter's position and condition, I expect that bankruptcy would be very easy and straightforward and it would put an immediate end to everything. There is no stigma involved to bankruptcy nowadays and certainly a lot less stigma and a lot less stress for somebody like your daughter who appears to be suffering and also some other ways.

 

I would be looking at this very carefully and I'm interested to know whether you have discussed it with step change and what they have said.

 

I think I would be taking Lloyds in hand. Don't hand control to them. They don't have your daughter's interests in mind. They don't have the interests of other creditors in mind. They only want to look after themselves. Lloyds are extremely dangerous.

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Thank you Bankfodder for replying so quickly, I have considered bankruptcy as a solution but she would lose her job and she says this is the only thing that keeps her sane, so ruled it out, if I can look at the debt and negotiate settlements / reductions thus take the pressure off her then hopefully all she will need to concentrate is getting healthy mentally and her daughter. I will let you know when I hae spoken to Stepchange.

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Well pardon me asking, but what is her job that will consider that this is such a critical matter for somebody in such a state? And have you considered going to the police about the abuse?

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The abuse was dealt with by the police,

they asked me to not get involved and my daughter asked me not to listen to her evidence,

but he got away with it,

he was twenty

 

the kids involved and there were five of them abused were five and six so how on earth he got off is beyond me.

 

She works for a cheque cashing agency and has done all the FCA checks and simply will not consider bankruptcy,

believe me I wish she would as it would be so simple,

 

plus I feel as does my wife that she needs to give up work and simply start fixing herself but she refuses and is too fragile for me to insist,

 

if we say no will not help she threatens

to kill herself, already offered us our grandaughter,

 

we are doing everything we can to fix this and let her still have a life,

I think she sees her job as somewhere she is in control, her ex made her feel worthless and out of control

 

the abuser did the same and if I push too hard I am trying to take control of her life so work even though she gains very little from it feels like a safe space.

 

At the end of the day, my wife and I love her and our grand-daughter and just want her to be happy so if I have to jump through a few hoops then so be it thank for your help and support with this.

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Thanks.

 

Well my advice stands that I would be very wary about giving any concessions to Lloyds. I don't understand the attitude of Step Change and personally I think they are wrong. I would stand up to Lloyds and face them down and even this little victory might do wonders for your daughters morale. Otherwise, she will spend her life backing down and backing down and giving into everyone and I don't see that it can help anyone's morale at all.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hi, finally have the infomration from Lloyds, the loan they are chasing my daughter for is at an extortionate 20.00 % per annum she borrowed 9600 over 4 years on a salary of 14k, I am thinking of attcacking Lloyds on the grounds thar rate to salary clearly was unaffordable and they just gave her the loan to drag her further into debt, does any one have any suggestions if this is the irght path or attack them in a different way, balance outstanding is 4800, so could offer partial payment and get it closed off.

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Earlier, you told us that Step Change were going to renegotiate. Any news on that?

 

You could certainly negotiate a full and final settlement if you wanted, but I would be especially interested to see the DMP agreement that they had – and you don't seem to have obtained any information about that.

 

Once again, if they are part of a general DMP, then they are prevented from breaking ranks. Furthermore, if they are in a DMP, they would not normally be entitled to review it and to vary the payments unless that was a precondition of the DMP.

 

Where is the Lloyd's agreement?

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irresponsible lending too?

 

 

dx

please don't hit Quote...just type we know what we said earlier..

DCA's view debtors as suckers, marks and mugs

NO DCA has ANY legal powers whatsoever on ANY debt no matter what it's Type

and they

are NOT and can NEVER  be BAILIFFS. even if a debt has been to court..

If everyone stopped blindly paying DCA's Tomorrow, their industry would collapse overnight... 

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Share on other sites

i will chase it and let you know

 

I'd really like you to find out from step change why they feel that it is in your interests to accept the pressure from Lloyds to increase payments to them at the expense of all your other creditors. I'd really like you to find out from step change why they consider that Lloyds could be justified in varying an established agreement which has worked without any problems for a period of time. I'd really like you to find out from step change why they consider that Lloyds should breach the very clear rules about this in CONC and why they (step change) should assist them.

 

Also, if you maintain the payments to Lloyds that their existing level, then there is more incentive on Lloyds to give you a full and final settlement deal which is more interesting to you. If you raise the level of payments to them then they may be less likely to agree to a full and final settlement deal and if they do, it may cost you more to buy yourself out of the debt altogether.

 

I'm really not at all convinced that step change is acting in your best interests or that they are thinking out of the box. Frankly I have to wonder what the hell is going on.

 

By attempting to vary the agreement, Lloyds is in breach of CONC and they are in breach of BCOBS because they are not treating you fairly. It seems that step change is going along with it.

 

Maybe there's some factor here that simply isn't clear and that we don't understand – but I think that you should be asking questions from step change. I suspect that step change has an agenda which is to keep good relations with everybody including Lloyds even if it comes at the expense of the interests of some of their clients. So far as I can see, this can be the only reason why step change is taking this attitude.

You definitely need copies of the documentation

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I think so, then to compund that they have given her a credit card at 24% and then one at 27% but on the checks they sent with SAR's request they did not bothet to credit check even when the debts were owed to them, they even have the temirty to state the loan was to pay off TSB debts

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