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The new Alphabet for the Aged


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someone just sent me this by email :)

 

New Alphabet:

A is for apple, and B is for boat,

That used to be right, but now it won’t float!

Age before beauty is what we once said,

But let's be a bit more realistic instead.

 

Now The “new “Alphabet:

 

A is for arthritis; B’s the bad back, C's the chest pains, perhaps car-di-ac?

 

D is for dental decay and decline, E is for eyesight, can't read that top line!

 

F is for fissures and fluid retention, G is for gas which I'd rather not mention.

 

H high blood pressure--I'd rather it low; I for incisions with scars you can show.

 

J is for joints, out of socket, won’t mend, K is for knees that crack when they bend.

 

L ’s for libido, what happened to sex? M is for memory, I forget what comes next.

 

N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low; O is for osteo, bones that don’t grow!

 

P for prescriptions, I have quite a few, just give me a pill and I'll be good as new!

 

Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu? R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.

 

S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears, T is for Tinnitus; bells in my ears!

 

U is for urinary; troubles with flow; V for vertigo, that's 'dizzy,' you know.

 

W for worry, now what's going ‘round? X is for x-ray, and what might be found.

 

Y for another year I'm left here behind, Z is for zest I still have-- in my mind!

 

I've survived all the symptoms, my body’s deployed,

And I'm keeping twenty-six doctors fully employed!

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Dealing with Customer Service Departments? - read the CAG Guide first

 

1: Making a PPI claim ? - Q & A's and spreadsheets for single premium policy - HERE

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3: Feel Bullied by Creditors or Debt Collectors? Read Here

4: Staying Calm About Debt  Read Here

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BCOBS

 

2: Does your Bank play fair - You can force your Bank to play Fair with you

3: Banking Conduct of Business Regulations - The Hidden Rules

4: BCOBS and Unfair Treatment - Common Examples of Banks Behaving Badly

5: Fair Treatment for Credit Card Holders and Borrowers - COBS

 

Advice & opinions given by citizenb are personal, are not endorsed by Consumer Action Group or Bank Action Group, and are offered informally, without prejudice & without liability. Your decisions and actions are your own, and should you be in any doubt, you are advised to seek the opinion of a qualified professional.

 

PLEASE DO NOT ASK ME TO GIVE ADVICE BY PM - IF YOU PROVIDE A LINK TO YOUR THREAD THEN I WILL BE HAPPY TO OFFER ADVICE THERE:D

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:lol:

R.I.P my beautiful grey ghost, gone but never forgotten, taken so suddenly, 04/07/2004 ~ ~ 02/03/2017

Gone but never forgotten,Little Miss Sunshine, Alisha Marie. 15/12/2005 ~ ~ 13/02/2006

Our  beloved Dalmatian Jazz,  gone to join Wal at Rainbow Bridge, hope you are now pain free .  20/9/2005 ~ ~ 24/3/2019

 

 

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someone just sent me this by email :)

Just checked things out,to see what applies,slightly worrying.Crossed out those that do not apply,yet.

 

New Alphabet:

A is for apple, and B is for boat,

That used to be right, but now it won’t float!

Age before beauty is what we once said,

But let's be a bit more realistic instead.

 

Now The “new “Alphabet:

 

A is for arthritis; B’s the bad back, C's the chest pains, perhaps car-di-ac?

 

D is for dental decay and decline, E is for eyesight, can't read that top line!

All gone,maintenance free,

 

H high blood pressure--I'd rather it low; I for incisions with scars you can show.

Only scar i have is on my chest,Mary Malone she broke my heart.:razz:

 

L ’s for libido, what happened to sex? I will leave that on,not admitting anything.

M is for memory, I forget what comes next.

 

P for prescriptions, I have quite a few, just give me a pill and I'll be good as new!

 

Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu? R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.

 

T is for Tinnitus; bells in my ears!

 

W for worry, now what's going ‘round? X is for x-ray, and what might be found.

 

Y for another year I'm left here behind, Z is for zest I still have-- in my mind!

 

I've survived all the symptoms, my body’s deployed,

And I'm keeping twenty-six doctors fully employed!

 

A enjoyable thread,so funny.

Made me check things out.Sure i have said that already.

Deleted those that do not apply,yet.Maybe said that as well,i am off.

Which ones apply to you out there,be honest,we are watching.:lol:

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Very clever, HB :)

Have we helped you ...?         Please Donate button to the Consumer Action Group

 

Uploading documents to CAG ** Instructions **

 

Looking for a draft letter? Use the CAG Library

Dealing with Customer Service Departments? - read the CAG Guide first

 

1: Making a PPI claim ? - Q & A's and spreadsheets for single premium policy - HERE

2: Take back control of your finances - Debt Diaries

3: Feel Bullied by Creditors or Debt Collectors? Read Here

4: Staying Calm About Debt  Read Here

5: Forum rules - These have been updated - Please Read

 

 

BCOBS

 

2: Does your Bank play fair - You can force your Bank to play Fair with you

3: Banking Conduct of Business Regulations - The Hidden Rules

4: BCOBS and Unfair Treatment - Common Examples of Banks Behaving Badly

5: Fair Treatment for Credit Card Holders and Borrowers - COBS

 

Advice & opinions given by citizenb are personal, are not endorsed by Consumer Action Group or Bank Action Group, and are offered informally, without prejudice & without liability. Your decisions and actions are your own, and should you be in any doubt, you are advised to seek the opinion of a qualified professional.

 

PLEASE DO NOT ASK ME TO GIVE ADVICE BY PM - IF YOU PROVIDE A LINK TO YOUR THREAD THEN I WILL BE HAPPY TO OFFER ADVICE THERE:D

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Makes me smile as well.

It did the first time i heard it,but forgot the words.

 

So i have popped back in to hear it again.

Probably i will have to pop back in a day or so because i have forgotten the words again.

Now what was i doing,i have forgotten,oh dear.

Nice tune though as i remember,one more time perhaps.

Now where did i hear that tune.

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