Caught shoplifting, this is killing me inside. Please help me.

[Tahmina.ray]

I am constantly in tears thinking about what I've done. I am puzzled because I've always been proud enough to say and hear from people about how honest and trustworthy I am, and now I doubt this myself.

[mikeymack2002]

I hope this does not upset you too much. But, if this offence was committed after the 13/04/2015 you could be subject to the Courts charge fee. This is a huge fee starting from £150.00 if you plead guilty at the first opportunity. Plus you may still have costs and a fine on top then you have the victims surcharge to add as well.

 

You really should attend the hearing and fill out and hand in a form called a MC100. This shows the Court how much money you can afford to pay each week.

 

You MUST pay your fine each week or risk getting a Enforcement Agent getting involved. This will cost you even more money...

 

I am only saying the above so you know in advance what could happen... Saying that always inform the Court if you are unable to make a single payment. It will be the best thing you can do....

 

I know that my post may upset you or some others but it is the truth and knowing now means it will not be such a shock to you at Court.. Sorry for that ...

[silverfox1961]

 

I been really stressed out over my four month old baby as he has recently been suspected of cows milk allergy,

and been prescribed with a dairy free milk which he is struggling to drink.

 

I can fully empathise with you on that score. One of my grandchildren is intolerant of dairy. Soya milk is nasty!

 

I'm not using this as an excuse but this is one of the reasons of my sleepless nights and the stress on my shoulders.

I wish I could wave a magic wand to make him better.

 

Actually, while not an excuse, it is a reason and courts tend not to accept excuses anyway. Working out the reasoning is what they want. I suspect that you shoplifted as a boost. Wanting desperately to feel better makes people do the strangest things when depressed. (Mine was slot machines)

 

 

I still don't understand why I did what I did and I don't think no one else would have the answer to my question if I don't myself.

 

Your GP should be able to spot the symptoms quite easily, especially if they have experience of Post Natal Depression (as most should) Hopefully your GP will offer the best option for you, not the simplest.

 

 

I have never done anything like this ever before and ik completely ashamed of myself.

 

It is quite normal to feel shame but this needs putting into context. You did what you did so there is no dwell on it too much. Over time (and with help) this feeling should diminish and once you are back to 'normal' (whatever that means) you should feel lots better.

 

I wish there was more we could do to help but we are anonymous names on forum. All we can do is offer virtual support as and when needed.

 

Good luck next week.

[Tahmina.ray]

It is quite normal to feel shame but this needs putting into context. You did what you did so there is no dwell on it too much. Over time (and with help) this feeling should diminish and once you are back to 'normal' (whatever that means) you should feel lots better.

 

I wish there was more we could do to help but we are anonymous names on forum. All we can do is offer virtual support as and when needed.

 

Good luck next week.

 

 

Thanks a lot, you really are a very good help and supporter. Your comments really do make me feel better and gives me hopes that everything will be fine at the end.

 

Well i do have an update and hopefully you can advice me as I really am in a dilemma right now. I' had a phone call by the police today who have now offered me to accept a police caution or they take it to court. I have told them I need time to think and will let him know late afternoon.

 

What do you think I should now do? I haven't seen a dr yet but say it comes out that I am suffering from postpartum depression do I have a chance of saving myself from this caution if I told the court of my condition or will things get worse if I decided to go to court? I want to obviously do what will effect me less. Is it better I accept the police caution or tell them I want to go court?

[renegadeimp]

Take the caution. It's the best resolution.

[dx100uk]

take the caution matter resolved and over with

 

 

its a very simple visit to your local police station

 

 

 

 

 

 

dx

[renegadeimp]

Yep. You basically sign a bit of paper and youre done. End of this whole sorry story.

[BazzaS]

take the caution matter resolved and over with

 

its a very simple visit to your local police station

 

dx

 

I agree that accepting the caution is likely better than it going to court, since a guilty verdict in court seems probable.

 

However, it isn't simply "matter resolved and over with".

The caution involves the OP accepting their guilt and means they will have a criminal record.

They will have to sign paperwork confirming these.

 

Whilst this is still likely the best possible course for the OP to take, they should be aware of this and its implications (such as eg needing to be declared for immigration controls when visiting some countries such as the USA and Australia).

It won't stop the OP visiting such, but they might need to obtain a visa in advance rather than relying on a visa waiver programme (for example, for the USA).

 

It may also have to be declared eg for job applications or applications for insurance.

 

It isn't "the end of the world" : lots of people get on fine with insurance, jobs, and travel with such a minor record, but the OP does need to be aware of it.

 

This is a further reason they should consider telling their (supportive!) husband : if it "all comes out, later", their husband may ask "why didn't you tell me before?"

[Tahmina.ray]

Thank you everyone. I was also thinking the caution would be the simplest to take but I was just searching on the Internet about postpartumI depression and my symptoms seem to sum up so thought maybe if I was diagnosed with postpartum depression I maybe able to save myself from the caution. But wasn't sure if going to court would simply just make things more ugly for me.

[BazzaS]

Thank you everyone. I was also thinking the caution would be the simplest to take but I was just searching on the Internet about postpartumI depression and my symptoms seem to sum up so thought maybe if I was diagnosed with postpartum depression I maybe able to save myself from the caution. But wasn't sure if going to court would simply just make things more ugly for me.

 

You need advice from a solicitor, with the medical opinion / diagnosis from your doctor.

The solicitor can advise you on if you are likely to avoid prosecution (or a successful prosecution) if your doctor diagnoses post-partum depression.

Your defence then becomes that you never had dishonest intent, as your actions were due to the post-natal depression.

 

I don't know the likelyhood of success of this, and suggest you get professional legal advice from a solicitor regarding your options before accepting the caution.

[silverfox1961]

Whilst Post Natal Depression can be used in mitigation, the offer of the caution is still the best option. By you accepting what you did was wrong, the caution will be the end of police involvement.

No court. No costs. No fine or other penalty (restorative justice)

 

While the caution will be the end of this particular matter, seeing your GP and getting the help you deserve will help you further and then you can start living your life again.

 

When the letters from RLP start, come back and get help to see them off.

[Bazooka Boo]

IMO, when I was offered a caution, I grabbed it simply because I just could not be bothered to fight it, it was over and done with, forgotten about

and I could get on with my life.

 

It will allow you to move on, and deal with the real issue, and you can focus on what really matters in the world, which is you and your family.

[Tahmina.ray]

UPDATE: Hello to everyone. First of all I'd like to thank everyone who has supported me on this post and for your valuable advice. I just thought I would update you all on my situation. I am on anti depressants and feel much better. I accepted the caution as wanting it done and dusted with. I received a rlp letter asking for £190 odd but I have ignored this, just the one letter so far.

[honeybee13]

Hello again, nice to see you. You sound much better than you were, I'm so pleased for you.

 

And thank you for the update, it's always nice to know how someone got on. You seem to have a good understanding of how RLP operate, ignoring is right. If the letters ever get scary, come back here and we'll reassure you.

 

:grouphug:HB

[renegadeimp]

You'll get a few letters from rlp over there few months. Just keep ignoring

[silverfox1961]

Hi again and well done for getting your life back.

 

There are two ways to deal with this. The first is ignore as RLP can do nothing to you however, they are persistent. You can expect anywhere between 3 and 6 letters from them until they pass the 'speculative invoice' on to a debt collector. Let us be clear on this, any debt collector who writes to you demanding an 'undisputed amount' has even less power than RLP but as you now know RLP have no power over you so by virtue of that, the debt collector can do nothing either.

 

The only entity that can chase you is the store except they don't bother.

 

The other option (which I do not recommend) is to write to RLP explaining your mental health issues but you will need to prove this by disclosing personal details. This may have the effect of them cancelling the charge.

 

Your best option is every time a letter comes, post up the letter (suitably anonymised) and watch us rip it to pieces.

[silverfox1961]

Just in case you haven't read this thread (and a bit of showing off) please read the link below

 

http://www.consumeractiongroup.co.uk/forum/showthread.php?448994-RLP-FAQ-s.-What-do-they-mean-Reviewed-September-2015&p=4762870&viewfull=1#post4762870

[Bazooka Boo]

Well done for getting some treatment, and well done for not falling for the useless powerless RLP dumb begging letters.