Wrongly Accused - Total Overreaction

[KFC]

A good hard working Polish friend of mine received an emergency phone call and had to leave work because his son was apparently seriously ill.

 

The child (under 2 years) was dragging his leg, couldn't stand or walk properly.

 

His mother had taken him to see a GP, and was advised to go to hospital straight away, that morning.

 

Whilst they were in the hospital, they were seen by one doctor, then another.... then another, they took blood, did all sorts of tests etc, including taking X-ray's.

 

After hours and hours they were still none the wiser and just a waste of time.

 

It was said, that there was not much more that they could do as they couldn't identify what was wrong.

 

 

By this time it was around 8-9 pm at night, when they were hungry, tired, and the child was crying to go home.

 

They were told, that there isn't much more that the hospital could do, and so decided to go home.

 

They signed the necessary paperwork and went home.

 

 

 

About 11 pm, knock, knock at the door, its the Police !

 

They were being accused of abusing their child ! - after lots of upset, questions etc, the police went satisfied, that there was nothing wrong or untoward.

 

 

The whole house was woken up,

 

The neighbours finding out what had happened,

 

His wife, very distressed, scared that her kids could be taken away, scared to leave them at nursery, compounded by the problem that her English isn't too brilliant and cant't defend herself properly.

 

A day or so later, the symptoms disappeared, it seams that it was just a virus after all !

 

Now his wife is worried that they are now on some sort of list with Social Services, can't sleep at night and the neighbours think that they have hurt their child.

 

Every knock at the door, his wife panics.

 

What should he do ?

 

Thanks.

[lenn]

What do you think he should do?

[KFC]

I was asking you.

[KFC]

I forgot to say - that there were NO Bruises, cuts, marks whatsoever on his son, or fractures, he was examined by lots of times, they just didn't know what was wrong with or why he was dragging his leg etc.

 

I was thinkin that he should make a formal complaint to the hospital,

 

I think that the Police were just doing their Job.

 

Where should he make formal complaint to, should it be addressed to the hospital or somewhere else ?

 

Given that mud sticks, his wife is worrying and their neighbours think that they beat their kids. !

 

 

.

[king12345]

Find out who's reported them and start complaining.

A strong worded letter from a solicitor (about £50) usually gets all sorts of apologies from everyone high up.

Copy the letter to the local mp, get as many people as possible involved including press.

They might have some space in midweek paper and publish it.

Also name and shame the responsible organisation on the internet.

Unfortunately, unless there's a conviction you can't publish the name of the person.

Tell your friend not to let it go because once you are listed as a dangerous parent, any time the kids will get hurt the police will show up.

They always go after decent people.

If your friends were the usual chavs they would be helped.

Being nice and decent makes social services job easier and you become the easy target.

Don't let it go.

[stu007]

I have to agree they need to make a Formal Complaint to the NHS Hospital concerned as to why the Police were sent to you property with a Full Explanation (Look at this NHS Choices Link) http://www.nhs.uk/choiceintheNHS/Rightsandpledges/complaints/Pages/NHScomplaints.aspx

 

They should also ask for the full medical qualifications of the doctors that attend there child (you need to be sure these weren't trainee doctors).

 

Now I know you say the Police were just doing there job but they need to know from the Police in writing why they were made to attend so a letter to the Chief Constable even if pointing out you understand they were doing there job but you require clarification as to why these officers attended your property in writing.

 

This way you will see if the Polices version matches the hospital version of events also.

[KFC]

Thanks for the reply King12345, it seems so over the top and out of order to send the police round when there was nothing to suggest any abuse was going on, no bruises, cuts, injuries at all !

 

My friend just wants to reassure his wife, and vindicate themselves from any wrongdoing, after all, their son was just ill with a virus !

 

I think he would like to complain etc, to stop some other poor person having to go through the same awful thing !

 

I feel terrible for them, and am just trying to help them.

[KFC]

Thank you stu007,

 

I think that finding out exactly who did what and why, is the way to get to the bottom of it all.

 

Then my friend can decide what to do next.

 

They a bit upset and shocked by it all, and how this could be allowed to happen.

[stu007]

Hi KFC

 

This can be so upsetting for any parent to be accused of that and understandably so.

 

You are correct they need to find out exactly why this has happened but please ensure everything is put in writing (always get proof of posting and keep copies of all letters).

 

please keep us updated

[think about it]

I forgot to say - that there were NO Bruises, cuts, marks whatsoever on his son, or fractures, he was examined by lots of times, they just didn't know what was wrong with or why he was dragging his leg etc.

 

I was thinkin that he should make a formal complaint to the hospital,

 

I think that the Police were just doing their Job.

 

 

Can I please play devil's advocate here?

 

What if there was something 'wrong' at home. I know we all dread to think it, especially about our friends and family but there have been several cases recently like Victoria Climbie, Peter Connelly (Baby P), Keanu Williams and Hamzah Khan where opportunities to identify that these children were at risk were missed.

 

Do we accept that sometimes in doing our best to ensure that these cases never happen again that we might get it wrong? I'd find it far easier to sleep if I'd raised the concern and it was shown to be nothing than if I later found out that something dreadful was happening as in the cases above and I'd ignored my gut feeling.

 

I understand it must be terrifying for the parents but the door has to swing both ways and if anyone has a concern then they were right to raise it. If the parents discharged the little one themselves had the medical team not completed all of the tests they wanted to? Had they discussed admitting him for observation?

 

I can't see how making sure that the little one's leg wasn't seriously injured could ever be considered as a waste of time. Surely there not being a serious injury is the best possible outcome?

 

Like I say - devil's advocate.

[leigh04]

Was a social worker present when police arrived at their property?

 

Also if there was a possibilty of suspected abuse/ neglect the hospital would have kept them there until a social worker arrived.

[king12345]

I agree that all complaints should be investigated.

Unfortunately social workers have to fill their books with figures and thus they target decent people.

They will not go against parents who would swear, threaten them and kick them out of their property.

Same applies to the police.

This is the system, that's why it's important to cause a public outrage, otherwise they won't leave you alone anymore.

To anyone saying that this is not true I refer them to the cases listed by 'think about it'.

The parents were allowed to abuse the children because anytime a social worker approached them, they would be threaten and swore at, so they went after the 'easy preys', decent parents.

All of this is due to the softly softly british approach of criminals linked to the target culture in social and security public offices.

[lenn]

If your friend has done nothing wrong, then there is nothing to worry about. Simple

[fletch70]

While I agree that to have a mark against your name is a worry and have never subscribed to the "if you have done nothing wrong don't worry" theory the Daily Mail peddle you have to admit that Drs and Social workers are between a rock and a hard place.

If they act when there is no reason they are vilified but if they do not act and then something happens well .....

 

I would agree , letter to the police and Social services (if they attended) as well as the hospital

 

I also do not agree that they only go for the good people, in fact I feel that in many cases the "good" middle class parents get away with more

[lenn]

Lets put this in perspective. Child attends hospital with unexplained injury. It is normal practice to refer to social services and police.

 

What if there was a problem; wouldn't you want it investigated?

 

I repeat if there is nothing going on then that will be the end of it.

 

Oh and I don't read the Daily Mail either.

[fletch70]

I would never be so rude as to suggest you read the DM

 

I do agree with you, better safe than sorry

[think about it]

I agree that all complaints should be investigated.

Unfortunately social workers have to fill their books with figures and thus they target decent people.

 

No, they investigate complaints, no one gets 'targeted'. Trust me, their 'books' are fit to bursting anyway without picking on random people.

 

They will not go against parents who would swear, threaten them and kick them out of their property.

 

Not in any of the experiences I've had of Social Workers, I've had the absolute displeasure of being involved in both adult and child protection cases and believe me, someone raising their voice / becoming threatening / swearing changes nothing.

 

This is the system, that's why it's important to cause a public outrage, otherwise they won't leave you alone anymore.

 

See above, if there's a legitimate complaint made such as an unexplained injury then there's no cause for 'public outrage'. Outrage is only due when these services don't investigate.

 

As the others have said, the OP's friend is right to seek an explanation and assurances of no further action relating to this case if indeed there are no problems, but to cause an outrage because the protection we have is working and issues/concerns are followed up is more likely to raise suspicions than it is to quash them. As it stands, the OP's friend and the police / social workers are the only people who know the reason behind the visit. Yes, the neighbors know that the police attended their house, but they don't know why.

 

As Lenn says, if there's nothing wrong then there's nothing to worry about.

[king12345]

When I was a kid I used to get up to all sort of mischief, injuring myself in the process.

Under today's policies they would have taken me away from my family.

A firm response is needed.

As said, they need to keep their figures up and they will target the decent parents, same as the police targeting the little insignificant common offences committed by stupid people rather than targeting the hardcore criminals.

How many people are charged with common assault everyday for pushing someone bothering them?

And how many motorists are stopped for exceeding speed by a few miles while many others go around without insurance or even driving license?

I hate drugs, but what's the point of charging stupid people for having a dose for personal use when they could target the dealers?

The answers to all these questions is: because it's easy and the charged 'offenders' don't cause any aggravation.

[reallymadwoman]

I will reiterate that social services have much better things to do than pick on innocent parents and there are absolutely no targets involved.

 

Much, much better to ask questions of an innocent family than risk not picking up the case where there is a problem, and I say that having been on the receiving end of a malicious allegation which could have cost me my job and family.

[think about it]

When I was a kid I used to get up to all sort of mischief, injuring myself in the process.

Under today's policies they would have taken me away from my family.

A firm response is needed.

As said, they need to keep their figures up and they will target the decent parents, same as the police targeting the little insignificant common offences committed by stupid people rather than targeting the hardcore criminals.

How many people are charged with common assault everyday for pushing someone bothering them?

And how many motorists are stopped for exceeding speed by a few miles while many others go around without insurance or even driving license?

I hate drugs, but what's the point of charging stupid people for having a dose for personal use when they could target the dealers?

The answers to all these questions is: because it's easy and the charged 'offenders' don't cause any aggravation.

 

King, please understand this – no one would be removed from their parents due to being a child. My son is exactly the same and runs around like a stunt man most of the time and there’s nothing un-explained about that. There’s a difference between the normal bumps and bruises and an unexplained weakness in one leg that would raise suspicions.

 

There are NO figures or targets.

 

Social work departments struggle to deal with the work that they already have, case list sizes are growing all of the time and there’s no reason whatsoever to actively seek cases within compliant families in order to boost numbers.

 

You mention a firm response. What would that be exactly? Is it making enough noise that you think people will leave you alone?

 

Please, familiarise yourself with the work that the Police and Social Work departments do, there’s nothing ‘easy’ about it.

 

You also talk of dealing with ‘hardcore’ criminality. Tell me, where is the threshold? When does theft become hardcore, is anything less than £10 acceptable to you? What about £100 or £1000?

 

Or, is 35mph in a 30mph limit acceptable but 40mph isn’t?

 

You see the point, I hope. By allowing apparently minor criminality you open the doors for more serious crime to become socially acceptable. If you set the ‘limit’ at £10.00 for theft then would you prosecute someone for stealing £10.50?

 

Perhaps convictions for ‘common’ assault, speeding and low volume drug usage / possession are more common because they are just that, more common.

 

Not every drug user is an international cartel leader nor is every speeding motorist an insurance fraudster – doesn’t mean it’s acceptable however and by setting the threshold at a clearly understood level everyone knows where they stand.

If I choose to drive my car at 10mph over the limit then I should accept the consequences of being caught, causing aggravation is totally futile and pointless.

 

I maintain what I said earlier, by all means seek an explanation into what happened but it’s no mystery why the duty medical staff felt it necessary to raise their concerns. They can’t prevent anyone from leaving the hospital and if neither the Police or Social Services were immediately available at the time that the child’s parents chose to self discharge then the medical team can’t be expected to sit on them until someone comes.

[king12345]

So, social workers have no targets?

Same as traffic wardens I suppose.

Your statement is laughable.

I didn't say anything about having a threshold, a crime is a crime.

But it is a fact that to pump figures up they target the easy jobs.

Unexplained injuries should be questioned, but I've seen with my own eyes that they're more interested in charging the innocent parents rather than treat the injuried child.

From your statements it sounds like you're one of them and I respect the defence you put up, but it would be naive to really believe it.

Bailiffs defend their actions too, but can we really believe what they say?

Or should we judge from their actions?

[reallymadwoman]

Equating traffic wardens and bailiffs with social workers?

Charging innocent parents instead of treating a child's injuries?

Really?

 

And what target would a social worker have any way - how many parents to prosecute, how many children to take into care?

 

I repeat, really?

 

I am in no way questioning your right to believe every word you've written king12345, but also pointing out that other beliefs are available and reasonable.

[KFC]

Lets put this in perspective. Child attends hospital with unexplained injury. It is normal practice to refer to social services and police.

.

 

 

What injury ? ....the poor child had the Flu ! ....the retarded doctors couldn't find anything wrong.

 

We sendin letter to the police, who and why it was reported to the police in the first place,

 

What exactly ie, evidence did they act on ?

 

Jus wastin police time.

 

 

 

If there was any history, marks, injury etc which there was absolutely none whatsoever, then I agree it best to check it out etc.

 

When the police get back to us, we gonna update you on here. I was jus askin how best to proceed, cos it was an unbelievable and nonsensical overreaction.

 

The police banging the door down at 11 pm is over the top, all the neighbours finding out what it all about is a bit worrying and mud sticks even if you done nowt wrong.

[fletch70]

Sorry , the child was limping and they couldn't find any cause. It cleared up so you as an untrained medical person says it was a virus which is now the flu. If a child had the flu then a Dr would have noticed the raging fever if nothing else.

 

I do not have children but has two nephews and two nieces. I would certainly rather any unexplained incident was checked that accidentally missed.

My youngest Nephew is a real little boy, into everything , gets his fair share of cuts and scrapes and he hasn;t been investigated (that's with two professional parents so according to some top of the list to be targetted)

 

Hard as this may sound and loyal as you may be, unless you are there 24 hours a day and are privy to everything you have no idea if there is history. I am not suggesting there is but you don't know.

[think about it]

So, as I’ve been ‘accused’ of being one of ‘them’ I’ll clarify my position as a Practice Manager in a GP Surgery – not a social worker, clinician or police officer…

 

Okay - here's why the police were called.

 

Below is an excerpt from a child’s A&E record sheet with all of the identifying information removed.

 

ALL clinical staff MUST adhere to this flowchart with all cases. As can be seen below even with no concerns, the clinician still follows through the flow chart to confirm this.

 

Why did the police attend? Follow the flow chart and find out for yourself.

 

Was there a delay in seeking treatment? Not known – not detailed above.

 

Does the history or nature of the injury raise any concerns? Yes – unexplained weakness in one leg.

 

Are there any unexplained injuries? Yes – weakness in one leg, no history or explanation.

 

Does the child’s behaviour or interaction give you any cause for concern? Yes – despite no obvious injury the child is dragging leg.

 

Absconded – Yes, parents discharged child before investigations were complete.

 

So the concerned clinicians will then go through all of the steps detailed before contacting the police was it an over-reaction? No. It was the people we trust with looking after our best interests doing their job.