Divorce, Credit card and HMRC debt

[happilyeverafter]

Firstly my apologies if I am posting this in the wrong forum, I have looked around and can't identify a more appropriate place.I am looking to divorce my husband.Finance stats areHome - Purchased jointly, rough value £125K, outstanding mortgage £77KCredit card in my name - £2.5KCredit card in his name £4KJoint overdraft £500Joint loan £500 (will clear this before separation)He is self employed tradesman (sole trader, not VAT registered) and owes the inland revenue around £12K in outstanding taxes with arrangments being set up to pay in installments. Previously when I have talked about separating he has said that he would refuse to move out, refuse to contribute towards household bills and also stop paying the outstanding tax bill so that the family home would be repossessed leaving me and our child homeless.My understanding is that we would both be responsible for our own personal credit card debt, jointly for the overdraft/loan but I am not clear on whether I am jointly liable for his business debts and if I can legally get him to leave the house we jointly own and let me buy his share of the equity in the house. If he moved out I would get some tax credits to help pay bills whereas if he stays in the house and refuses to contribute towards the household expenses I would not be able to manage these by myself. I have made arrangements to see CAB next week to try and gain some information on my options. My hope was for him to agree to me purchasing his share of the equity in the home and both keeping our personal debts. Does anyone have any advise for me please?

[ericsbrother]

You are not responsible for his debts, personal or business unless it is a business partnership. To get him out of the house you would need to show a court that you need it more than he does so it will be down the family court route which is not very nice. HMRC wont put apossession order on your house but could put a charge on the property.Try and get him to agree to family mediation

[happilyeverafter]

Thanks for your reply.

 

I am doubtful that he would engage with mediation. I've twice attempted to talk to him about separating and both times has resulted in him getting angry and causing damage to the house. He's quite volatile so I am hoping to get all my facts together and have a plan in place before letting him know what is happening re the separation.

 

I was hoping to tell him the day I file the divorce papers and hope that the gravity of that makes him take me seriously as we've been unhappy for so long I think he thinks it is normal and I won't ever stand up to him.

[ericsbrother]

Your CAB appointment will provide some help, dont walk out on him and dont accept intimidation either. Talking about separation is neither here nor there, the divorce papers will focus things. Some people will remain in denial throughout the entire procedure and end up losing out so it will be cheaper for both of you to work at this in a businesslike manner. You may ahve to seek the help of a solicitor, if you do I would recommend using one that does only family matters as they will work for you rather than just their fee. The CAB may know one locally to you that they have good reports about.

[brokebutnotbeatn]

1) Stay put. 2) take each day as it comes.3) Do you have any 'proof' of his volatility? If not can you get some e.g. whenever he is violent call the police. You can apply to the judge for a court order to remove him if you are at risk but the judge will need some sort of proof as the house is jointly owned.

I waited over 6 years 'not' divorcing my ex husband and guess what; I did pluck up the courage eventually. Once I started it was done and dusted within 5 months. He resisted every step of the way. You can and will get through this. I couldn't ford a solicitor but I have an initial free 30 mins and the sols wrote down the documents I needed to get and where to get them. I had another appt. part way through and the sols worded a court order for me for the financial settlement. If you can afford a family lawyer if only to guide you then that would be the best thing. A lot of Googling and reading around will stand you in good stead. Good luck. One day at a time. x

[happilyeverafter]

Thanks to you both for replying.I'm feeling very positive about my CAB appointment and loking forward to being able to finally break ties.I have taken photographs of smashed windows/holes punched in doors and walls etc but most of what worries me is very low level such as punching headboard when I'm lying in bed (no spare room) coming home in the early hours of the morning and turning bedroom television on loudly when I'm sleeping, setting alrams for early hours of morning then snoozing them, taking phone calls in bed at 5am etc. He has the capacity to make it extremely uncomfortable for me to live in the same house as him and at the centre of this is our child who I do not want to witness what happens.

[brokebutnotbeatn]

I understand. I would go down to the local policy station and say you are becoming increasingly worried for your and your son's safety. Then you will have this to apply to the judge for a court order to remove your husband from the house. The police will also be able to advise on this if you tell them you are about to file for divorce and you are scared it will escalate. I had to meet the server outside the house and let them in as my ex wouldn't cooperate at all. If you need to PM me please do. As I say one step at a time. You have plenty to file for unreasonable behaviour especially as you have supporting pictures so things should be relatively straight forward. The time will be when he refuses to complete the financial statement. There is much I can share with you when the time is right and if it is relevant but I won't do so on an open forum. x