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BRAINSDB74

My mother in law is suicidal

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Hi everyone.

 

I wonder if some of you might be able to offer some advice.

 

Long story short, my mother in law has split up from her husband who has run off with another woman.

 

My mother in law was in full time employment up to 15 or so years ago and how is a housewife.

Her husband has always been the bread winner since they were married and has a good job I would estimate earning around 80K a year. They have a joint bank account which his wage is paid into, and my mother in Law (Lets call her Jan), manages all the household bills. Although she no longer works she is certainly not work shy, but she helps us with the grandkids/babysitting, etc., and has seven dogs (her dogs are her life), so could only get a part time job if needed. They have no savings and seven years remaining on the mortgage.

 

They split about six months ago and all was amicable at first. He used to work away 6 days a week so not a great deal changed, he just didn't come home at all. He told her they should just in effect pretend nothings happened with regards to finances and he would continue with the joint account.

 

The last three months have been different. He has basically been spending money out of the account left right and centre, and rackign up huge bills on their joint credit cards. He has been paying out rent on another property (we assume the new womans), buying furniture, holidays, gifts, all sorts. Jan has been getting letters from everone saying the bills are not being paid as direct debits are being returned, and the mortgage has not been paid for the last 2 months also. Last month he spent £7K!.

 

She has rung him to say the spending has to stop as bilsl are not being paid and he simply said he wil see what he would do, but I think essentially he has wiped his hands of her.

 

As per the thread title she has obviusly been upset for a while but the last week has been suicidal and we have been staying with her in turn as we are that worried. She says the only thing keeping her alive now is her dogs, and obviously if she loses her house she can't keep her dogs so that would genuinly be it. She has always been very black and white and for her now this is simply a matter of fact. She now has piles of evelopes through the door each day that she now can't bring herself to even open.

 

She has been to the CAB who said that she is entitled to no benefits at all as she stopped full time emplpyment before a certain date where the regulations were changed. She has not sponged in her life but right now she needs some real help and we are in debt ourslevves so unfortunately simply cannot bail her out.

 

Any advice you can provide would be greatfully received. If the mortgage continutes to be unpaid what happens next, what kind of timescales, etc. What can she do ?

 

Kind regards.

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Hi, is there any equity in the property ?


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They bought it around 2007 so I would guess no. He is not answering her calls so she is literally stuck until someone throws her out as far as I can see or her electricity gets cut off/she can't afford food. I truly feel for her.

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Has she seen a solicitor regarding the separation ?


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My advice is based on my opinion and experience only. It is not to be taken as legal advice - if you are unsure you should seek professional help.

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Sorry but if I have to take it at face value that she is suicidal she obviously need psychiatric help. I'm no fan of orthodox psychiatry but I think this comes before any legal help.


"Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for Poundland"

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