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Llinos
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hello

 

someone told me that somebody might help me im so streesed out and i feel just awful ,

i care for someone , a friend he is 37 years old i have known for many years ,

after he lost his partner 8 years ago he had various mental health issues and an obsession that everyone around him might die

would result in endless panic attacks etc ,

 

on august the 7th his cousin died and he only has a few people in his life his cousin being one of them .now the way he goes about it is ,pretending that it has not happened

i know that is not the way to deal with things but i respect that we are all different so i go along with it and dont mention it ,if someone mentions any death we all know (those around him) that we

have to stay with him ,my main concern being hes too unpredictable,

 

well he had a medical and i phoned up the atos healthcare center the day before and was told to leave my phone number and the person i was ringing about and they

would ring back when it was less busy ,

i totally forgot about it and they did not ring back ,well on the day of the mdical i rang my friend up and said that i couldnt take him as my tyre has blown (which was obviously a lie i didnt want to mention the death he was dealing with)

my reasons for ringing the medical health center was to explain that taking him to the medical was too risky and if i could re-arrange another appointment in the next 4 weeks and that would give me time to get him an appointment with the DR and get medication to

keep him calm etc

 

now he never reads mail but he opened the department of works and pensions letter and filled out some form saying "why did you not attend" and he put the blown tyre etc

and his brother mailed it off ,

 

well he had a letter back saying that his reason for attending was not good enough and have stopped all his benefits and even his housing benefit and council tax benefits

i dont know what to do , i dont want to mention what the real reason for taking him to the medical was because i know he will sink into depression etc

 

so its all my fault that this has happened to him , i cant sleep i feel so guilty

all i got going round my head is why didnt the medical center people ring me back or have someone actually answer the phone when you ring

 

He's had an appeal form sent to him and i told him i would take care of it and i dont know what to put

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You put the truth, there are no other answers, anything else would be false and wouldn't help.

They won't just take your word for it mind you, they will want expert medical evidence as well, so you need to contact his GP.

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i havent told the medical people ,they think that he didnt show up for the medical because i had a blown tyre , but the truth was i had no intention of taking him because of he is still grieving and is unpredictable ,

do i put it on that appeal form ?

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Hello there.

 

I think it might be worth trying to speak to your local CAB or Welfare Rights who often work with the CAB, for help with this.

 

I think you may have made things more complicated by not telling the truth in the first place. I also don't know if the DWP/Atos are going to deal with a third party, but hopefully the guys may know a bit more than I do.

 

My best, HB

Illegitimi non carborundum

 

 

 

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i havent told the medical people ,they think that he didnt show up for the medical because i had a blown tyre , but the truth was i had no intention of taking him because of he is still grieving and is unpredictable ,

do i put it on that appeal form ?

 

Of course. They have said a blown tyre isn't enough of an excuse. The genuine reason may make all the difference.

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Yes blown tyres are not a good enough excuse for not making a medical, there are plenty of other means of transport. It's never right to lie. Actually, taking him when he is unpredictable may well have been a good thing for him, far better that than to medicate him so he appears calm when that is not how he is. I don't think you are doing him any favours at all. Are you his DWP and LA representative? Neither should deal with you if you are not. If you are, then I would contact the LA with details of his current income so they can reinstate the HB and CTB first off and then write to the DWP admitting your untruths and stating what the truth is and hopefully they will take that into consideration when they decide how to proceed.

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