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Hi all

 

first post here so please bare with me. I've searching the web for advice on a situation I'm currently going through at work and discovered this site, so here goes.

 

I'm current absent from work through stress, to many things to go through but if I mention just a few, being bullied (swore at during meetings, accused of being a homosexual (I don't have any issues with anyone’s sexuality) in front of my colleagues) as I said, it would take to long to go through all my issues. All these issues have finally come to ahead and it's just got to much for me now so I had to go and see my GP as I just couldn’t take anymore.

 

My question is, I'm now in my 4th week of absence and my employer has contacted me at home today asking to come round tomorrow for a welfare meeting. Can someone tell me what to expect and what kind of questions they can ask.

 

Once again I'm left with the feeling that I'm being harassed and this time in my own home, was I in a position to decline this meeting? My employer at first requested that I attend this meeting on site and could I go in and have the meeting. I declined, as I'm still not feeling to good.

 

Thanks in advance for any advice.

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I was in exactly the same position, and refused to attend the meeting, and they just came out to my house, it was ok, as I told them I was bringing a grievance against my workplace. I was being bullied and became very ill over all of it. But I did feel totally harrassed, in fact every day there was a letter or email from them. But now my grievance has been approved and is being investigated, it seems to have calmed down. By the way I have been off for about 7 months, but I am slowly getting better. Have got a transfer, so I have something to go back to. Do you belong to a union? I think is ACAS over in England, that can advise on these situations. Someone here will know better than me. My grievance is under Dignity at Work...

LilythePink

If you liked what I said, and if it helped in any way, please tip my scales..... thank you:)

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They have a duty to 'assist' you so welfare visits are hardly a startling development only one to be expected. However having said that it is your home and you control the environment, what you say goes in your home. You want to exclude certain members of the company because they are bully's? Do it. You want to record the meeting, do it. Tell them the conditions that they attend your home. Best also to have an independent witness.

 

All communications should be in writing. Keep copies.

 

The thing is Trevor, you seem to have not only been bullied but subject to homophobic discrimination and probably been made ill from a combination of the two.

 

HR are going to know that if you choose to take them to the ET then they may be on a sticky wicket. There is generally only 3 months from the last incident to making a complaint in the ET. You may have wasted a month already so time is crucial. The employer will waste as much time as they can and string you along.

 

You should put in a grievance, if you haven't done already.

 

Check to see if you have Union cover or independent legal protection cover for employment disputes. Beware of unions also wasting time ... check links on CAG for similar horror stories. Best if you have the insurance and if so phone your legal providers and follow their advice.

 

If you want to go it alone... and many do.... and win.... CAGgers will assist you along the way. Some have great advice to give and loads of experience. Individuals win against the biggest of companies...... don't fear them.

 

if you have 'left' in yourt mind already you are in a good place because your situation can only get better BUT DO NOT RESIGN.... forget all the cr*p about constructive dismissal that is the worst option available to you. You have to let the employer dismiss you and that then is the ultimate discrimination ie victimisation if done after you have put in a grieveance.

 

Make sure you get the support of your GP.

 

Be careful as to what medical notes you allow your employer access to.

 

It may be helpful if you are to fight the employer to give a fuller story to caggers.

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Do you have a fair employment law over there, or Equality Comission, because they told me I could take my employers for discrimination on the grounds of disability, if they stall the process, because of my depression and anxiety lasting 12 months. I don't know whether you have someone like that. We have it because of the troubles we had in Northern Ireland..... to keep everyone quiet....

LilythePink

If you liked what I said, and if it helped in any way, please tip my scales..... thank you:)

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Trevor - PapaSmurf speaks absolute sense. I say this as a Senior Manager of a FTSE100 company who is taking my employer to tribunal over disability discrimination. Take some time to write everything down about what has happened and then draw together a diary of the events in date order. It sounds like there must of been witnesses in these meetings who should verify your story. Be brave - you have every reason to be stressed(and no doubt depressed) over your treatment. Speak to your employers yes, but also ensure they are very aware that your sickness is of their making. Good luck.

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they are coming to your home!?!? It sounds like hell.

 

I've been through similar to you and my employer appears to have encouraged this manager to do it. I was off sick for nearlly 3 months over a period of 12 months for work caused stress and depression so work cut my salary to £85pw!

 

I've got a friggin London mortgage! My stress caused me to cry every day and sleep less than 4 hours at night!!

 

Who is coming to your home? Are they an Occupational Health expert? Or one of your bully bosses or one of their friends?.. How can they assess your Welfare?!? Are they medically trained or trained in Mental Health.

 

Your own GP is your best support. He can get your counselling.FILM THEM at your house - as they tell you off for being stressed! It sounds so intimidating.

 

I wrote to my local MP and the internal whistleblower (on Health and Saftey grounds). Disability, Discrimination and Victimisation... buzz words.

 

Get Citizens Advice Bureau legal advice. Plus your local council might provide free legal help.Good Luck Mr! It's hell - but it will end and you'll look back and see it for a crap moment in life.

 

NELSON MANDELLA is my daily mantra. If he can put up with hell for 20+ years... we can take it! Remember - he had lots of supporters - so get support from everyone you can!

Edited by honeybee13
Editing in some spacing for ease of reading.
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Hello and welcome, Stresspants.

 

Thank you for your support for Trevor, I'm sure he will appreciate it.

 

If you have any questions of your own that we can help with, you're welcome to start a thread of your own.

 

My best, HB

Illegitimi non carborundum

 

 

 

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I would not worry. My company policy is that at 4 weeks we do a keep in touch visit with anyone off ill, at their own home as it is more convenient for them. It isn't to catch anyone out, it's to see if any support is needed, pick up outstanding fit notes, advise of any major workplace changes, and have a cup of tea. I don't take anyone with me (if I am the boss) . Depending who it is, if it sounds like they will be off a while etc, I may take a copy of the absence policy with me a) so they know what to expect with money b) so they know when they will hit trigger points for stage warnings etc.

 

If I were asked to meet in a hotel cafe/ coffee shop/ work premises/ other quiet place by the employee, that would be fine by me.

 

I hope it went ok for you; do update us if you want to talk abotu what happened.

Never assume anyone on the internet is who they say they are. Only rely on advice from insured professionals you have paid for!

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