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Me and My debts and mental health issues **£28k Written off thanks to CAG**


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Can i confess to having provident loans was over 1600 but now 760 paying 10 a week. Shoppacrook 700 25 per week........ payplan dont know about this but when dad died he had no money to be buried.................

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Hi jelly

 

Have you got any Penalty Charges or have you been mis-sold PPI on any of your Credit Cards?

More info in (1) (2) and (3).

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Thank you

 

 

i was starting to wonder if anyone was interested so your responce lifted my spirits.

 

 

Thank you for sharing your experience with me,

ive felt a little ashamed admitting on here re my breakdown but realised after arriving at the Gps in a ghost like fashion

that i was coming to the end of my own strength.

 

 

All creditors have been paid monthly via payplan they get 300 per month between them but after a new income/exp

i realise i now have only 250 if i dont pay the ruddy sharks.

 

 

My fault for going there but how the hell could i afford the funeral.

 

 

My fears grew when i found myself going without and my son asking questions then i ended up looking for the most painfree way out..... crazy crazy.

 

 

I should count myself lucky that after 3 months into the plan when i upped it to 300 per month with overtime they stopped all ineterest...

....theres is no overtime now.

 

 

I asked payplan about reducing monthly payment and they warned me that the creditors would start chasing me again and interest could start.

....that added to my depressed state.

 

 

They know i could sell my house and pay them all off but you know ive lived in kids homes as a child

and i like to feel that the security of a home where no one can move me is two fingers up to the services that told me

i would always be at the bottom of the ladder...rotten dogs lol.

 

 

I hear your loss , but i also hear your calmness after all you ve been through and yes if i was in your postion id go bankrupt.

 

 

I hope your having a fab weekend and yes do come back, i need some help here.

 

 

I also wonder if i sent a cca request would it help me or would i be walking into a bees nest.

...lots of questions but hopefully i can open the blinds in my house over coming weeks

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Hi jellycubes

 

 

To echo Tingy’s support, there is no shame in mental illness; I would sit for hours shaking and suicidal before I found CAG. I also agree that it makes sense to break things down into manageable chunks. There is a downside to DIY which is that you will get very nasty harassment along the way; I find a combination of mental preparation (they are enemy bandits trying to take away my home and destroy me and mine) together with the application of sound CAG protocols (everything in writing and formal complaints at every turn of the screw) arms me to deal with them. I am no longer afraid of them.

 

Substantial equity weakens your negotiating position, so I agree that effectively you have to set up a long term DMP. Long term means it has to be sustainable and all expenditure has to factor in contingencies, vehicle replacement and hikes in energy costs: you will have to live with the budget you produce for, say, five years. Many of us here can help you with ‘trigger’ figures. Hopefully, for many of your accounts the payments offered will be similar to your existing Payplan arrangements and interest and charges will remain frozen (although you may get some hassle along the way). For those accounts that will not freeze interest, a case by case attack is needed; again, you’ll get a lot of help here (but again you’ll get harassed). The smaller doorstep accounts should not be ignored but should be dealt with as above.

 

Once all this in place it becomes difficult to start challenging CCAs, PPI and charges; this decision needs to be taken in advance. There is great merit in immediately tackling PPI and less merit in the others, given that you have been in a DMP for three years; this is just my view and you will quickly see that in the CAG house there are many mansions.

 

I hope this helps; this is a wonderful site that is run and supported by some amazingly good folk.

 

Love

 

vic

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Over the last few years there has been a significant amount of work within the free advice sector to highlight the effects debt can have on mental health.

 

Under the new version of the Lending Code, any creditor has to behave in a reasonable, sympathetic and fair way with the customers - even more so if there is a potential health-related issue.

New version of the code can be found on their website: http://www.lendingstandardsboard.org.uk/thecode.html

 

A really good list of the debt and mental health resources can be found here: http://www.malg.org.uk/dmhdocslist.html

 

Martin Lewis has also put together a decent guide too:

 

http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/cards/mental-health-guide

 

All creditors are fully aware of their obligations and if any of them act in a way in which you believe to be over-the-top we will assist with a complaint.

 

Vic and Tingy will see you good, I can assure you of that :)

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Wow thank you all, i sat and absorbed the advice, read the honesty and had to ask myself if i was capable of taking on the stress of going it alone on a dmp.

 

 

In honesty i couldnt find the strength just now, clinging on to living.

 

 

What i did do though is called payplan, told them of my depressed state and just how i entered doorstep lenders etc etc.

 

 

They were to be fair great, they took the details of the doorstep lenders, reduced my monthly payment to them after

going through ie and were non judgemental.

 

 

Provident refused to give me the bank details, just bloody awkward but shoppacrook gave them willingly though if they knew it

was going in dmp i doubt theyd have been so helpful.

 

 

I faced the fear and did it... blinds still shut all day and still living in darkness...

now i fear the repercussions when the doorstep lenders find out....omg will they take my pitifull goods ?

 

 

Ive 30 pounds in the bank no food in the house but going to creep out later and spend it.

..id been saving it for shopacrooks weekly payment. How stupid have i been.

 

 

I want to control my dmp but just cant face it yet.... have i let you all down ?

 

 

i hope not as it you that helps me keep going. Will you help me if the doorstep loan collectors start to bully me..

 

 

.. they wont take it lying down will they

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Hi Jelly cubes,

 

First of i have read your thread and i think you have done a great job so far, Admitting the debt and sharing it was my biggest fear, not knowing where to turn and not wanting to admit it, but as soon as i found this site and posted my thread i felt a million times better, i started to sleep i started not to panic and eventually i started my own dmp. You haven't let anyone down by deciding to stay with your dmp company, at all, you have to be strong and have to be able to let the letters and the phone calls go over your head and reading your posts i think you have made the right decision for the moment.

 

What i will say though is though when i went with the cccs even knowing they set it up and got in contact with the creditors and they paid them eventually i still had to ring my creditors to negotiate freezing the interest and late charges etc, which was not that bad as they seem to have a department now that deals with debt help, Like Tingy said some played ball and some simply haven't and basically will end up selling m debt and probably make a lose. So it might be worth looking at your debts and see which ones you still pay interest on and which ones have reduced or do not charge at all and then you will have a good idea on which creditor you might need to work on to play ball.

 

I looked at going into bankruptcy and it sounds great all your debts cleared etc etc but in the end the cons out weighed the pros in my case but maybe that will be a few hours reading on that subject, and there is load of advice on here as you probably already aware of:

 

Yes we will help you every step of the way and Jellycubes get those blinds open and sit proud, No one intends to get into debt and not be able to pay back and pretty much everyone in their lifetime will have financial problems!

 

If you have any questions etc feel free to ask and if you like ill send you the thread for when i first started managing my own finances after being very depressed

 

All the best

 

baz86

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Thank you, ive been touched by the support and it gave me strength to get out and buy a frozen beef dinner, god bless birdseye !

 

 

woofed it down like a tramp but it got me out of the house.

 

 

I didnt feel guilty spending shopacrooks weekly payment and treated my son to a game rental. and a chipshop tea...

now that smile and hug was worth it.

 

 

Yes i must open the blinds, so far and i dont know how but my son apart from moaning about the lack of food, money,

the hole in his only pair of school trousers and asking questions remains a happy boy..

.. just my bloody guilt that eats me.

 

 

Ive read other threads, the responces to mine also and its very easy to sometimes feel totally alone

but reading others who ve been on the suicidal end of debt helps me realise that im not alone in this.

 

 

I found my self on this site everyday, its helps.

I see a responce and my heart beats fast and i thank you all for that.

 

 

Do i tell the agents ive put the debt in a DMP, the ones that have become my alledged friends, they come round and tell me their problems..

.... or do i just not open the door....or do i sit tight and see what happens..... please be here to help me

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it's amazing that the simple things in life make people happy - i.e. your frozen roast beef dinner and a game rental for your kid. Thats what you should be remembering - all the good things, not the crap you get from Creditors. Chin up, keep fighting and stay strong, remember creditors like to make you feel vulnerable and ashamed and as if you are doing something wrong. They dont want you to seek help or think for yourself or appear as if you know more than them, you have done the right thing going to PayPlan, you are dealing with your debts with a FREE reputable provider. Creditors want you to cave in, I know, I have seen it happen, but what doesn't break us makes us stronger. To help keep me strong, I look around and see my family is healthy and will always be there for me. That keeps me going. You have to have hope.

 

What does annoy me is that people mess up, we make mistakes and we pay dearly for it, the Banks, mess up, we (the taxpayer) bail them out - still they have no shame in spending money on their flash cars and expensive Champagne parties. Here we have someone who has their head in the right place, making their kid happy with a game rental and who is our government helping more? This is what we are up against.

 

Smile in the face of adversity, you will get through this. I know I have ranted ( I am getting bad at that), but I dont think it would do any harm to fire off a CCA request to all of your Creditors, just to see who has some potential to be taken to task. I don't think it will do any harm, but you will have all your agreements with all the terms so you can see what is what should you want to challenge it. I was with PayPlan, did that, managed it myself and wrote off almost £10k. It's hard work, really hard and stressful but gives you an option and more importantly a wee bit of hope to keep you strong. Either way, you are dealing with it and that's good enough.

 

With ref to your CCA's I basically fought tooth and nail to "write-off" the debts I could - it was quite stressful, so you may be better avoiding that for now, but it is always an option in the future. Small steps at a time - you will get there. I have learnt so much from people on this forum to which I am very grateful and always will be. You too will probably get more confident in time, so stay as you are for now - you have actually put me in the mood for one of those roast beef dinners!!!!

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Yes your right, one step at a time and i guess as my mental health improves i will be fighting like a dog.

..i hope thats soon but i guess the less pressure for now all the better as im still very ill.

 

 

I dont ever want to dip to the lowest point in my life again, i have my son to think of.

 

 

As for the frozen beef dinner go for it....lol i loved it so much i could have eaten another....birdseye for tea again

tom though my sons refuses to eat this i can afford to get him some sausages.

 

 

See if i hadnt come on here when i did id have had nothing and been crying at the thought of how to feed my boy.

 

 

The fears to line those sharks pockets took over my real priority and the endless days i fed my son whilst starving myself

make me realise just how low id become.

 

 

I still fear the repercussions of the doorstep sharks but i will keep posting... need to talk and share

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Huge hugs coming your way hun!! ((hug))

 

keep posting and sharing - it will help to keep your thoughts clear and ease some of the emotional stress for you xxx

"In this situation, you know what you have to do? Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming." Dory - Finding Nemo.:wink:

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when you say doorstep sharks - do you mean provident, greenwood and the likes? It worries me that you mean 'real' loansharks - as in the illegal kind. If Provident/Greenwood and the likes of them, don't let them worry you, if they are still coming to your door looking for payment this should be stopped through PayPlan. They are no different from any other Creditor, if they are still coming to your door, speak to PayPlan about this to get it stopped. If that doesn't help I will draft up a letter for you to send them, if they still don't take note, the FoS can get involved. No-one should have to worry about answering their door or opening their blinds. If it's the other kind, Crime Stoppers via 0800 555 111 is your best bet - thats a debt you won't have to pay.

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Hi Jellycubes

 

This is the first time we have spoke, my wife has had a very severe mental illness and we, like others here have had our own debt problems, even though i have almost got rid of them all and my wife has almost made a full recovery, all i can say is this..........with the help from others here, YOU WILL get through this and you WILL begin to live a better life for it.

As Tingy states, were all here to help and nothing makes me more determind than to help those with health problems which just get brushed aside by these companys, well not with us around !

Your two priorities are you and your little boy, if you can do that then well will mostly do the rest. (you might need to post stuff lol ! )

 

Matt

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Just read your thread about doorstep agents - again no e-mail alert! Yes, tell them that it is now in a DMP. If you don't feel you can face them, then call the Head Office - the number should be on your weekly book and tell them, and ask them to inform the agents. Being who they are, they may continue to try to call and collect. This is where you really need to steel yourself and say you are no longer dealing with your debts so please stop pestering.

 

Tingy,

 

I.ve been looking through the lending code with regards to mental illness and change in attitude by a leading bank when i fired it at them was amazing, if i pm surely we can go down this route, whats your thoughts, PM me.

 

Matt

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Hi all, just a quick post to say im alive and well but boy oh boy its been a tough day, blinds still shut but going to try again tom. I feel supported with the honest and warm replies but step by step even if its small is a step in the right direction. I managed to go out to get some sausages but ran home with terrible anxiety... the upside to that bangers and mash and son still has that game for two more nights.. so no tv for me but hey im looking over at his lovely happy face now and its bloody well worth it x

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Jellycubes good to here and i look forward to listening and supporting your journey, i just hope now that some of the worries you has before you come to cag has gone and that you are thinking a lot more positive! Totally agree with earlier post about the priorities being You and your son.. The support on here never stops amazing and how many people come to help!

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Thank you, all of you. Yes will send the details Tingy, a very generous offer and im touched by that. I emailed payplan and advised them of my mental health state....and to inform creditors though i doubt they d give a toss. Blinds still shut, frightened within myself but dont want to get others down with my woes but right now and for along time to come i need you all. I put some makeup on today, first time in months and lol i shed 10 years off my face... who needs a surgeon ! House looks like ive been robbed but maybe i will tackle that tom. On a good note provident and shoppa now on DMP list.... they are due to collect tom but im not answering...maybe my blind shut fear will come in handy ! I remember my prov man drinking tea in my house pooring out his woes....when i asked him about what happens when a debts not paid he went from nice to nasty in a blink of an eye and told me he uses aggression... he s a big bloke so if i see him outside my house i will be hiding upstaires.............. shopacrook will send the manager...he smells like a kipper when hes turned up at mine before, however im in no state mentally for that. Sorry ive waffled on but its theraputic to be here

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Hey jellycubes with Tingy on side you are in good hands and he will do anything and everything he can to help an support you, As i said before if you need anything off me or would like me to do anything for you just let me know...

I tell you what i think you should aim to have those blinds open by Monday, i think you can do it!!!

I mean as far as the people knocking on your door they can threaten/ring/post as much as they like but if you havent got it you havent got it, they make so much money off intrest and the risk is always there thats why its unsecured. Eventually they will accept your payment as they wil have no choice, But i totally get you dont want to answer the door to them, i didnt want to open any bills or answer any calls as i felt so threatend and intimidatd.....

All the best

Baz

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Hi all, thank you for all of the continued support and also the pm. i hid under the covers fri to avoid prov and shoppa..... bad idea as it sent me into a no zone area. After all that they didnt turn up !!! I think i will feel better when i know they wont wont be calling again. I spoke to the metal health therapist and they ve decided to keep me on the valium for another 2 weeks and then long term on anti depressents. Its crazy how we trundle along all brave and then well lets not speak of the doom and gloom as i know many on here have been where im at now.....the light in all this is the many who ve climbed out of debt hell in many varieties. Tingy is going to help me with cca letters and i need to get my butt in gear and send that info...does it make sense that each task is a mountain right now but we have food in our bellies and that is already a mountain climbed. Its you guys that helped me. Blinds still closed but i did sit on the back doorstep and took in a littlee sunshine and then i found myself singing..lol i know that sounds not alot but its been a long time since ive done that and that was good considering my time under the covers led me to feel like a complete wreck. Will be back as arnie says.....step by step x

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Hi all, thank you for all of the continued support and also the pm. i hid under the covers fri to avoid prov and shoppa..... bad idea as it sent me into a no zone area. After all that they didnt turn up !!! I think i will feel better when i know they wont wont be calling again. I spoke to the metal health therapist and they ve decided to keep me on the valium for another 2 weeks and then long term on anti depressents. Its crazy how we trundle along all brave and then well lets not speak of the doom and gloom as i know many on here have been where im at now.....the light in all this is the many who ve climbed out of debt hell in many varieties. Tingy is going to help me with cca letters and i need to get my butt in gear and send that info...does it make sense that each task is a mountain right now but we have food in our bellies and that is already a mountain climbed. Its you guys that helped me. Blinds still closed but i did sit on the back doorstep and took in a littlee sunshine and then i found myself singing..lol i know that sounds not alot but its been a long time since ive done that and that was good considering my time under the covers led me to feel like a complete wreck. Will be back as arnie says.....step by step x

 

Your doing really great jellycubes, remember that the tablets do take a while kick in and you'll start feeling better soon. You've got the right support behind with the people on here and by the sounds of it mental health team, if you want any help with them including asking for for different types of medication then let me know, im very good at this as it's how i got my wife through it.

Just remember, you and your son come first and everyone else is below you lol.

 

Matt

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Guest jsa12

been on venlafaxine here for nine years sadly the thread is reflective of many in today's world,the human cost and toll is enormous and the stress at times unbearable and reading will be familiar to many.it seems to be a never ending cycle of quite spells' the suddenly it all erupts again.

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My wife went on a fairly new wonder drug called mirtazipine , she was on seltalopram after getting PND and was coming off then when things took a turn for the first, they got upped to the maximum and 4 weeks later no difference, after the 4th time of being in hospital as she had enough (you know what i mean) a CPN said to try mirtazipine, went doc's thurs and was put on straight a way at 15mg, was told if no improvement by sat put it up to 30mg, which we did and the doc wanted to see her on tues, we took her tues and her mood had changed dramatically but still having highs but more lows, so she was put upto the max of 45mg, and within 3 days she was back with us.

She had been very ill for over 3 years but only had mirtazipine for under a year as they worked that well, but for some reason they also work very quickly.

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