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Bullied by boss for 15 months. Eventually lost temper and swore. Disciplinary / Grievance

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I'm new here and was hoping someone would be able to advise. I have a bullying boss who has accused me of physically threatening him and who I have started a formal grievance procedure against. But I don't know what my rights are or what to expect next ...


The background (sorry, I've gone on a bit!)


The company I worked for was taken over in April 2010. In August 2010 a new manger was assigned to my team. In the 15 months since I have been subjected to sustained bullying from my manger including lying, aggressive and intimidating behaviour, aggressive swearing, and on a couple of occasions racist outbursts about, but not to, a Hungarian employee. He also has said several times that the more people he upsets in a day the better and seems to thrive on creating conflict and being aggressive towards people.


I am not the only one in my department who feels bullied and intimidated, however everyone,including me, is scared of him and are afraid to do anything to upset him. I have been keeping a log of his behaviour. October 2010, after an aggressive encounter with him I informed his line manager and had a mediation meeting with him.


In the mediation meeting he did not fully acknowledge his behaviour was unacceptable, and also lied to me saying that he was notified whenever a member of his team contacted HR and that during one previous conversation with him he had been scared I was going to hit him. He claimed that another manager would back up this claim. I did not get the courage to ask the other manager about this until recently. The other manager said this was not true.


Last Thursday I was asked to accompany him to a meeting room. There had been a disagreement between me and him about my holiday allocation. Due to a mistake I am now one day over my annual leave allowance. I maintain it was his mistake and believe I have proof. He maintained it was my mistake. I normally try to avoid disagreeing with him but when it comes down to losing money I decided to make a stand. Anyway he took me to a meeting room and started to tell me he was very disappointed about my lack of respect for him when I had originally spoken to him about this, that I had made "the whole room feel uncomfortable" and that his boss agreed.


I felt that what he said was hypocritical and started to attempt to defend myself when he told me not to talk over him. At this point 15 months of suppressed anger at his treatment of me erupted and I lost my temper and told him I was fed up with his lying, bullying and slander; that i would not be lectured on personal standards by him; and as I left I said "you are a f******* lying t**t and if you are offended by my conduct the other day then lodge a formal grievance with HR and I will kick your f****** a**e." I said this as I was leaving the room moving away from him.


I went straight to his boss, but he approached his boss too. His boss asked who should go first and I replied that I wasn't concerned who went first. He spoke to his boss. Who then spoke to me. His boss said I seemed 'keyed up' and should go home and we would talk on Friday.


His boss decided that instead of talking to me the following day there would be an investigation meeting on Monday (yesterday) with a member of HR. At this meeting his boss told me that he knew my boss was "economical with the truth", and that he just "has an opinion on everything" and that his aggressive nature is "simply his managerial style" and I should try to work with it.


The HR representative told me that sometimes people don't realise they are being aggressive, or how their behaviour affects others, until someone tells them. I replied that as he says about how much he enjoys upsetting people I found this difficult to believe. Also I had had a prior conversation with him about his behaviour (Oct 2010) and he had become slightly less aggressive but not much.


In this meeting I gave them a 10 page statement explaining the mitigating circumstances that led to my out of character outburst, and a 20 page log of his behaviour towards me over the last year.


After my meeting with them, they spoke to my boss. After that meeting I was told I would be sent an email that evening telling me I was to face disciplinary at 10 am Thursday 1st December. His Boss told me that my boss claimed I had physically threatened him and that my boss had also said there had been other occasions when I had raised my voice to him, which is not true.


I sought advice from a telephone advisory service (PPC) and they advised me to send an email with a letter attached immediately saying that I wanted to start a Formal Grievance and that "without looking at the grievance first it would be unfair and unreasonable process to proceed with a disciplinary".


I sent it last night (Monday) and haven't received an email about a disciplinary yet.


I am of previously good behaviour for the same company for 6 six years and have never lost my temper or sworn at another person. Whereas my boss has frequent run-ins and altercations with a number of people and then blames them for it.


Ideally what I would like to happen is for:


My grievance to be heard before the disciplinary

Them to find that my outburst was due to mitigating circumstances (ie bullying)

My boss to face a disciplinary procedure for his conduct

Me to be moved to a new team, maybe even department


Does anyone know how likely these outcomes are?





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Hi Welcome to the site.


You seem to have done all the right steps up to now and should be commended for that.


Outcomes............. seems to me they will do everything to dismiss you and make you an example. You could try and get others to put in similar grievances especially the poor person that was subject to racial torment. I suppose you felt insulted as much, which could be a grievance too read up the Equality Act 2010 to see why. The more of the staff to stand up against this bully the better.


However what is more likely is that the others will commiserate with you and watch to see if you succeed and hope to benefit from your trials by bully being less of one. People generally are cowards.

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Were you given a copy of the companies staff handbook.


Does your Company have a WhistleBlowing Policy as this may contain information on Bullying (which has happened to you) if it does also get a copy and use it in your defence

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