Feeling Down And Depressed

[scared001]

just needing some advice please guys....

 

looks like im having a major downer with all my debts at the mo and wondering if anyone out there has sought legal advice ie no win no fee or the companies that do write off debts etc......would anyone recommend this route? i dont think i can physically or mentally deal with this anymore on my own.

 

x

[angel_1]

hiya scared001

 

im really sorry to hear that you are feeling so low that you cannot continue and are looking at companies to go forward on your behalf

 

i can relate to your feelings of having to deal with all this on your own, but im not sure if these companies would do anything for you that would speed things up for you - and they would want upfront fees, im not aware of any good no win no fee solicitors at the moment

 

i was like this myself and after being on cag for the past 18 months i have read and read so much im learning all the time, and that gives me the strenght to continue

 

we are all here to help you too - have you started a thread for each of your creditors this way then specific help can be given to you at each stage?

 

i will look at any threads you have started and see what i can advise

 

keep positive im sure others will come along too later

 

take care we are all here to help each other out me included

 

laters angel x

[twofoot]

Don't despair, most of us have been there and done it including me. You need to seperate debt from life. Being in debt is a way of life and not being able to pay is a british disease. A lot are in the same boat but don't let on to anyone. You have done the right thing by telling us. There is a way out through CAG. I suggest you start a thread for each debt and follow advice from here. Believe me, in a few short months you'll be willing the DCAs to get in touch because you want to take them on. In no time at all it will be water off a ducks back. Treat each debt as an individual and not as part of a mountain. Being in debt is no crime, the whole country would be locked up if it were. I suggest you start those new threads now and tell us your situation and as much about the debt as possible. I for one will get some satisfaction by helping you sort this mess out.

[vjohn82]

Hi,

 

I have to sympathise with you because I know how it feels.

 

I have suffered with Clinical Depression since I was 15... been off and on prescription drugs since that time depending upon events.

 

Most recently (2007) I lost my Father to cancer and it was the single biggest jolt I have ever had... resulted in the worst case of depression I have ever had. Been on anti-depressants since Feb 09 and since then I have attempted to take control of my life.

 

I have found dealing with my debts and facing up to them to be one of the most empowering things I have ever done. In fact I feel more proud of getting over this period of my life than even getting through my degree between 2004/07.

 

I think you can find the strength in taking control of your life in this way and I could only see heartache in using a company to do it for you... judging by some of the threads from some of the people on here they have been loaded with even more worry.

 

However only you know your true circumstances and what is best. I can say for myself that if you ever need help with anything then you can always PM me and I will be on hand either with an answer or one from someone else... and we can all help you take back control.

 

Best of luck with the decision whatever you make

 

just needing some advice please guys....

 

looks like im having a major downer with all my debts at the mo and wondering if anyone out there has sought legal advice ie no win no fee or the companies that do write off debts etc......would anyone recommend this route? i dont think i can physically or mentally deal with this anymore on my own.

 

x

[Mr Worried]

Hi Scared...' dont be '

 

Listen here, we have all been how you are now, I am at the moment at the kitchen table elbow deep in papers, BLS, LOWELLS, APEX, ROBINSON WAY, MOORCROFT, ROSSENDALES, THE COUNCIL, MORTGAGE PROVIDER.

 

I am dealing with them all by using the advice I have gained from other members, and you need to too, as you have been asked too start the threads again, and I for one will stay up till late to offer you my help and advice where I can and feel able to do so.

 

DO NOT go to a company to help you as ( imo ) they have to much to do and tend to put you on the back boiler ( my personal experiance ) do it all from here, if your still getting grief from your probs then you must challenge them again, maybe you have done something wrong or your not sure about something??

 

Get your threads going and I'll even miss ' Sam Fox ' in the jungle for ya, and I'll try to help with them.

 

Whatya waiting for...get typing...

 

Mr W

[marg53]

Firstly I am so sorry to hear you feel so down.

 

I am not an expert but have been in your position , feeling drowned in debt and not knowing what I owed or to whom as I was living day to day on credit cards etc.

 

I did not own a computer and I phoned consumer credit counselling service.

They calmed me down and helped me to sort out who and what I owed.

 

I felt I could not physically cope with sorting it out but having someone talk me through each step helped. I felt happier making one payment per month to CCCS and they distributed payments to the creditors.

I have managed to have my monthly payments reduced when my income went down and did not have to dread the Postman or the phone ringing.

 

All the helpful people on this site will talk you through each step if you wish to tackle these debts by yourself as it may be that some of the costs you are being charged could be reclaimed. I only wish this forum was available to me all those years ago as I could possibly have been debt free by now.

However if you do feel you need to speak to someone you could try National Debt line or CCCS they give free advice.

 

Just keep in mind that you can get through this and you will feel so much better when it is all sorted.

Keep strong.

Kind Regards

Marg

[angel_1]

hiya again

 

wow some lovely replies so that surely shows you we are all here for you - scared,,,,pls dont be no longer

 

we will all try our best and if we dont know we will find out for you

 

laters all angel x:)

[lilly white]

just needing some advice please guys....

 

looks like im having a major downer with all my debts at the mo and wondering if anyone out there has sought legal advice ie no win no fee or the companies that do write off debts etc......would anyone recommend this route? i dont think i can physically or mentally deal with this anymore on my own.

 

x

 

we are here please is there a tread you are worried about the most if so give me a link.

 

regards lilly

[Bazooka Boo]

It makes me so mad that these companies can ruin people this way, being in debt is most certainly a way of life for 99% of people in this country.

 

It isn't anything to be ashamed about, and even less to be worried about, there is light at the end of the tunnel, tomorrow is a new day, what's happened in the past has happened no-one can change it, each new day gives you the chance to make changes in your life and learn from our mistakes.

 

One step at a time, slowly slowly catchy monkey!

 

Boo:wink:

[BeingHarrassed]

I can totally sympathise with you scared001......I am a single mother with debt coming out of my eyeballs. I wake up at night and then can't get back to sleep when the old brain cogs start working and I think about the mess i'm in! But every time I feel down - I remember how supportive the guys on here are - how fabulous the advise is - and how after every post I make - I feel totally reassured! You are most certainly not alone and you should never feel like you can't cope.

[ScabHunter]

You are far more "on your own" dealing with companies who don't give a monkey's about you but only care about your wallet than you are with the good people of the CAG. As evidenced by the quality of the response here, there is plenty of help and support available.

 

The important step is to create a strategic plan. We can't give you one, because it all depends on your circumstances.

 

1) Banking Security

 

Whatever your income is now, make sure it is paid into a bank account totally unrelated to any group you are having issues with. Securing your present income is the first step in getting some peace of mind, and in digging yourself out of debt trouble.

 

2) Communications

 

If you have multiple alleged debts, you are going to be bombarded with letters and silly telephone calls. It is important to be prepared for this, and to have a system in place to handle it.

 

Get a trueCall if you are able to. If not, or the telephone is not important to you, just pull the plug out of the wall when you need peace and quiet. If you do happen to answer the telephone, and it is a debt collector, just use the BT Phone Book advice for dealing with nuisance calls.

 

As I have no family, the only calls I ever receive are nuisance calls. I just pull the plug out and forget it. The last time I received a genuine telephone call was August 2007, just after my father died, and I doubt whether I'll ever get another one.

 

As for the paper mountain, get a filing system. If you don't have a box file, improvise with large envelopes. One large envelope for each alleged debt. It is essential to keep all relevant paperwork together.

 

We all get bombarded with junk mail from idiots anyway. What I have done is put a black bin bag at the bottom of the stairs. Everything which does not need to be filed goes in there. Only letters which need to go in the file come up the stairs. When the black bag is full, it goes out with the household rubbish. This, I have found, is the easiest way to get the paper mountain under control.

 

3) Challenging the attacker

 

Once these systems are in place, you are in a position to quickly read any letters which come in, and also to reply to anything which needs a response.

 

Follow the filtering system -

 

If a letter has no account details on it, it is simply a phishing attempt. Ignore it. File it away to use in future complaints as it breaches OFT guidelines.

 

If a letter has account details, but they are not yours, send a "prove it" letter.

 

If a letter has correctly identified one of your accounts, but there has been a period of six years somewhere in the account's history with no written acknowledgment or payment, send a "statute barred" letter.

 

If the alleged debt is not barred, but is a credit card or loan regulated under the Consumer Credit Act, send the CCA letter asking for a true copy of the agreement. You could also send a Subject Access Request to the original creditor if you believe there are unfair charges or mis-sold PPI. If an account has been terminated and passed on, I would send a SAR anyway, as you need to see the default notice.

 

If it is an overdraft, Subject Access Request the lender to get the information you need to calculate unfair charges.

 

As these letters are templates which need very little alteration, it shouldn't take much effort to handle a multitude of accounts.

 

One good idea if you really have a huge number of alleged debts is to draw up a "master sheet", with the names of the accounts down the left hand side of the page, and a progress report along each line. This lets you see instantly where you are with each account.

 

4) Work out your strategy

 

This is impossible to advise on, as it depends on the individual. If you have no assets and are on benefits, you could think about the Debt Relief Order as a "Get Out Of Jail Free" card. If everything goes pear-shaped, and you end up with CCJs and a whole stinking mess, you can be ready to pull out your trump card and get rid of it all.

 

There are, of course, consequences and considerations with this, but the Debt Relief Order can give people a chance to live again sometime in the future.

 

If you are a property owner, you can consider letting out a room to a lodger for some tax free income, which might cover the payments on any alleged debt which is enforceable. It all depends on your circumstances. A property which now has negative equity can still become an asset if you use it in the right way.

 

Nobody gets out of debt hell in five minutes, and especially not during a depression. Nevertheless, there is always something which can be done, and there is always someone on CAG who can help.

 

There are people who have been through bankruptcies, business failures, messy divorces, bereavements and many other tragic and difficult circumstances, and have come back to have successful lives. It has been done and it is possible.

 

This is one thing I would like to work on in the future - trying to add another dimension to all of this. CAG has proven to be brilliant at helping and supporting people through debt hell. Now, I would like to see us go forward to another dimension. If we can show half as much intelligence, teamwork and dedication in business as we have on CAG, we should all be able to make successful lives for ourselves.

 

As ever, I extend the same offer to you as many of my colleagues have. I am only a PM away.

 

SH

[Mr Worried]

You are far more "on your own" dealing with companies who don't give a monkey's about you but only care about your wallet than you are with the good people of the CAG. As evidenced by the quality of the response here, there is plenty of help and support available.

 

The important step is to create a strategic plan. We can't give you one, because it all depends on your circumstances.

 

1) Banking Security

 

Whatever your income is now, make sure it is paid into a bank account totally unrelated to any group you are having issues with. Securing your present income is the first step in getting some peace of mind, and in digging yourself out of debt trouble.

 

2) Communications

 

If you have multiple alleged debts, you are going to be bombarded with letters and silly telephone calls. It is important to be prepared for this, and to have a system in place to handle it.

 

Get a trueCall if you are able to. If not, or the telephone is not important to you, just pull the plug out of the wall when you need peace and quiet. If you do happen to answer the telephone, and it is a debt collector, just use the BT Phone Book advice for dealing with nuisance calls.

 

As I have no family, the only calls I ever receive are nuisance calls. I just pull the plug out and forget it. The last time I received a genuine telephone call was August 2007, just after my father died, and I doubt whether I'll ever get another one.

 

As for the paper mountain, get a filing system. If you don't have a box file, improvise with large envelopes. One large envelope for each alleged debt. It is essential to keep all relevant paperwork together.

 

We all get bombarded with junk mail from idiots anyway. What I have done is put a black bin bag at the bottom of the stairs. Everything which does not need to be filed goes in there. Only letters which need to go in the file come up the stairs. When the black bag is full, it goes out with the household rubbish. This, I have found, is the easiest way to get the paper mountain under control.

 

3) Challenging the attacker

 

Once these systems are in place, you are in a position to quickly read any letters which come in, and also to reply to anything which needs a response.

 

Follow the filtering system -

 

If a letter has no account details on it, it is simply a phishing attempt. Ignore it. File it away to use in future complaints as it breaches OFT guidelines.

 

If a letter has account details, but they are not yours, send a "prove it" letter.

 

If a letter has correctly identified one of your accounts, but there has been a period of six years somewhere in the account's history with no written acknowledgment or payment, send a "statute barred" letter.

 

If the alleged debt is not barred, but is a credit card or loan regulated under the Consumer Credit Act, send the CCA letter asking for a true copy of the agreement. You could also send a Subject Access Request to the original creditor if you believe there are unfair charges or mis-sold PPI. If an account has been terminated and passed on, I would send a SAR anyway, as you need to see the default notice.

 

If it is an overdraft, Subject Access Request the lender to get the information you need to calculate unfair charges.

 

As these letters are templates which need very little alteration, it shouldn't take much effort to handle a multitude of accounts.

 

One good idea if you really have a huge number of alleged debts is to draw up a "master sheet", with the names of the accounts down the left hand side of the page, and a progress report along each line. This lets you see instantly where you are with each account.

 

4) Work out your strategy

 

This is impossible to advise on, as it depends on the individual. If you have no assets and are on benefits, you could think about the Debt Relief Order as a "Get Out Of Jail Free" card. If everything goes pear-shaped, and you end up with CCJs and a whole stinking mess, you can be ready to pull out your trump card and get rid of it all.

 

There are, of course, consequences and considerations with this, but the Debt Relief Order can give people a chance to live again sometime in the future.

 

If you are a property owner, you can consider letting out a room to a lodger for some tax free income, which might cover the payments on any alleged debt which is enforceable. It all depends on your circumstances. A property which now has negative equity can still become an asset if you use it in the right way.

 

Nobody gets out of debt hell in five minutes, and especially not during a depression. Nevertheless, there is always something which can be done, and there is always someone on CAG who can help.

 

There are people who have been through bankruptcies, business failures, messy divorces, bereavements and many other tragic and difficult circumstances, and have come back to have successful lives. It has been done and it is possible.

 

This is one thing I would like to work on in the future - trying to add another dimension to all of this. CAG has proven to be brilliant at helping and supporting people through debt hell. Now, I would like to see us go forward to another dimension. If we can show half as much intelligence, teamwork and dedication in business as we have on CAG, we should all be able to make successful lives for ourselves.

 

As ever, I extend the same offer to you as many of my colleagues have. I am only a PM away.

 

SH

 

Well said scab, good craic.

 

Mr W

[summerbreeze]

Hi Scared

I feel for you . It is a terrible feeling to be ' drowning in debt' , to dread the phone ringing and the post arriving each day.

On CAG so many of us are in the same boat but you will get so much support here.

I was like you, just petrified all the time , sleepless and stressed.

I still get scared from time to time but I just post on here and get help from my CAG friends.

Just try to get through each crisis with the help available here.

I have never encountered such a selfless caring bunch of people as I have met here.

They will support you whether you choose to contact a Debt Manager or try to do it yourself.

Wishing you some peace

SB

[scared001]

oh wow, my eyes are welling up!! thank you to everyone who took the time and effort to respond, thank you so much. its all come to a head and if any of my family find out it would ruin them, my parents are elderly and theres no way one earth id go to them, its my mess and i need to sort it out.

 

my mess is with mbna, halifax, cap 1. have tried to set up different threads and then i get all confused again. as it stands this is where i am:

 

mbna - have sent me cca which i put up on here a while ago, am going to write this week claiming back my charges etc.....

halifax- sent har letter to robinsons who have now stopped calling, this is in relation to a credit card debt, well they all are really, think i need to send cca request if im not mistaken?

cap 1 - dca have now passed it back to them and they want me to carry on with payments,not sure i understand that bit as havent been able to pay anything since i was made redundant in jan, have made a few £1 token payments. i also posted up cca here a while back......

 

i am with cccs who have been fab. would it be a wise idea for me to get them to write to all the thiefs as per the above and try and come to a montly arrangement of some sort??

 

lastly, i have told abbey that i am in financial hardship, they sent me a cheque for £500 which is a tiny bit of what they owe me, i wrote to them again and they have asked me AGAIN for a copy of my budget as they want to re-evaluate, i have complained AGAIN......waiting to hear?? do i cash that money in the meantime......

 

sorry for all the questions but i find it easier if i just break it all down bit by bit.....

 

and a million thank yous once again....

[darling666]

morning scared

i was sitting here feeling as down as you and not knowing what to do. i joined this site a few days ago and my knowledge is growing, its going to be a slow job but with help and listening i think we will get there,

so thank you scared for posting your thread you helped me a lot to ,,,

[diddydicky]

oh wow, my eyes are welling up!! thank you to everyone who took the time and effort to respond, thank you so much. its all come to a head and if any of my family find out it would ruin them, my parents are elderly and theres no way one earth id go to them, its my mess and i need to sort it out.

 

my mess is with mbna, halifax, cap 1. have tried to set up different threads and then i get all confused again. as it stands this is where i am:

 

mbna - have sent me cca which i put up on here a while ago, am going to write this week claiming back my charges etc.....

halifax- sent har letter to robinsons who have now stopped calling, this is in relation to a credit card debt, well they all are really, think i need to send cca request if im not mistaken?

cap 1 - dca have now passed it back to them and they want me to carry on with payments,not sure i understand that bit as havent been able to pay anything since i was made redundant in jan, have made a few £1 token payments. i also posted up cca here a while back......

 

i am with cccs who have been fab. would it be a wise idea for me to get them to write to all the thiefs as per the above and try and come to a montly arrangement of some sort??

 

lastly, i have told abbey that i am in financial hardship, they sent me a cheque for £500 which is a tiny bit of what they owe me, i wrote to them again and they have asked me AGAIN for a copy of my budget as they want to re-evaluate, i have complained AGAIN......waiting to hear?? do i cash that money in the meantime......

 

sorry for all the questions but i find it easier if i just break it all down bit by bit.....

 

and a million thank yous once again....

 

what part of the country are you in?

[scared001]

am in london....unfortunately....

[Adfax]

Have been reading CAG for months and this is my first post - felt inspired to post by all of the really helpful and sympathetic replies on this thread.

 

I am in debt up to my eye balls and I am currently with CCCS Voluntary Arrangements putting together an IVA. In the meantime the creditors won't leave me alone. This has been making both me and my wife extremely down and fed up. However, I have found CAG a great source of support and advice. My strategy has been:

 

1. Get professional help - the first call was the hardest but CCCS has so far been great. The only thing I would say is don't pay for any help up front!

 

2. Change your phone number and go ex-directory. It is bliss not having up to 10 calls a day from morning to night.

 

3. Only correspond with your creditors in writing - even if they write telling you to phone.

 

4. If they do track you down by phone - as Capital One has managed to by getting my parents' telephone number (how they did this I am still trying to get to the bottom of) - send one of the letters that are available here warning them of harrasment. If nothing else it makes you feel better. mine hasn't had any effect as yet but I'm hopefuly

 

5. And above all else, remember that there is more to life than money (or the lack of) - much more. Living on a tight budget is tough at first, but to spend money and know it is your money and it is not getting you more into debt is a brilliant feeling. If only I had realised 10 years ago ...

[marg53]

Adfax

 

Well I agree with all you say about CAG .

I myself do not have an IVA so cannot offer any advice but I am sorry to hear the creditors are still bothering you . It does sound like you are coping very well and staying strong.

Yes there is more to life than money however when you feel inundated with debt and trying to get by it can be extremely difficult to keep positive.

 

I only wish more people who are struggling could find their way here to CAG to get some good , honest help and support.

Keep on with great attitude.

 

Regards

Marg