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I have a mortgage of £67,000 secured loan of £25,000 credit debts of £11,000 and I was on redundancy alert last summer, so took the loan to set up a business, it thrived at first but since xmas I have earned £124, I have been using the loan to pay my £1500 per month outgoings, I am not behind yet with any, although now into my overdraft and over the limit on a credit card, I have income of ctc/wtw which covers my mortgage and loan only, suppose to receive maintenance but ex refusing in hands of the CSA. I only eat a few biscuits of a piece of bread as I need to feed my daughter, I am lucky she has a hot lunch at school.

 

I from June will not be able to pay my bills, please please any advice would be appreciated, I have been so depressed I have even made a memory box for my daughter as I only see one way out, I can't eat, sleep and constantly am in bits I can't see a way out.

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Have you checked this site to see if you are entitled to any other benefits?

 

 

Here

 

Someone else will be along to give you more detailed advice.

 

 

Forget the memory box, I'm sure your daughter would much rather have you.

 

enamae

Please note: I have no qualifications in this area and any advice offered is given in good faith.

 

 

http://www.financial-ombudsman.org.uk/publications/Ombudsman-news/40/40_setoff.htm

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Hello Pebbles,

Welcome to CAG.:)

I really do feel for you in your situation, I know what it's like, trust me, but since coming on here my confidence in dealing with this situation has grown tremendously. You're among friends now who understand what it's like, so please try and relax and everyone on here will try and help you through it step by step.

Please try not to worry so much. You're obviously a very good and caring mother, and as already mentioned, your daughter needs you to be there for her, and she needs her smiling Mum back, so lets get cracking. Things are only as bad as you let them be, once you start taking control with the help of people on here you'll feel so much better.

I notice you've asked about the £1 template on another thread, send that in to the credit/loan companies with Postal Orders, and don't sign your signature just print your name. Send it by recorded delivery, save the slip and check online that its been received. Start counting 12 +2 working days. If they don't provide your agreements by then they are in default an you can legally withhold payment until they comply. Keep us informed every step of the way.

As the loan is secured you need to be careful not to put your home at risk, but you could try writing to them, explaining your circumstances and ask if they can give you a repayment holiday and freeze interest to give you time to sort things out.

Otherwise stick with paying only your priority bills.

Others more knowledgeable than I will be along to help you..I'll put the word out.

You might be better getting this moved to the Debt Collection forum as its a lot busier with more people to help.

If you want me to ask for it moving just shout.

Keep your chin up and take care,

Elsa x

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I have a mortgage of £67,000 secured loan of £25,000 credit debts of £11,000 and I was on redundancy alert last summer, so took the loan to set up a business, it thrived at first but since xmas I have earned £124, I have been using the loan to pay my £1500 per month outgoings, I am not behind yet with any, although now into my overdraft and over the limit on a credit card, I have income of ctc/wtw which covers my mortgage and loan only, suppose to receive maintenance but ex refusing in hands of the CSA. I only eat a few biscuits of a piece of bread as I need to feed my daughter, I am lucky she has a hot lunch at school.

 

I from June will not be able to pay my bills, please please any advice would be appreciated, I have been so depressed I have even made a memory box for my daughter as I only see one way out, I can't eat, sleep and constantly am in bits I can't see a way out.

Hi Pebbles

Please forget about the memory box as enamae said your daughter would rather have you around.When i first joined CAG both i and my OH was starting to feel like you but me joining CAG has made a big turn about for us and i now feel ive got some hope ,Everyone will help you on here and give you advice and support on how to deal with things.and there is alway lots of help ,Have you been to citizens advice for advice? I am surer they will be extremly helpful and symphathetic to someone in your siuation and there are lots of extra help for parents struggling to support themselves and their children with food bills and if it comes to it accomodation ,And even if any of them tried to enforce debts against you a judge would only order you to pay what you could reasonably afford even if it just a £1 a year!Thats why a lot of these credit card companies are very reluctant to take people to court because they know a judge would only order you to pay what you could afford after takeing into account all yours and your little girls living expenses (which would be a lot less thanwhat the bank was trying to get you to pay them)and if you had problems with mortgage and the worse came to the worse being a parent the council would have to find you accomodation.sunflowerx:)

Im happy to help with support and my own opinions but as i have no legal qualifications If I offer any thoughts to your problems please take it as from my life experience only and not of any legal standing. Always take further advice from the legal experts in your final action,

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Hi Pebbles

 

First thing is to not panic in this situation, as this won't help you or your little girl.

First thing to do is get a CCA from all your Credit card companies.

When did you take these cards out, also when did you take your secured loan out. This will be important when you deal with these companies.

 

Gaz

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Pebbles, I do understand how desperate you feel - I think a lot of us on CAG have considered taking drastic measures when we feel overwhelmed. These feelings will pass. No damned creditor is worth your life.

 

Your daughter is the most important, precious aspect of your life and you are hers; never forget that. All kids, and little girls in particular, need their mums - imagine how she'd feel if she knew you left her by choice. At the end of the day, all that really matters are the ones we love.

 

It may be hard to believe now, but you will find a way through this. You will receive no end of support from CAG.

 

At least the wtc/ctc covers the mortgage and secured loan - that's one positive. The credit cards, will just have to accept reduced token payments. Incidentally, when did you take out the cards, ie how old are they?

 

I see that Enamae has provided you with a link to see if you are getting all the benefits you are entitled to - don't forget that you can get help with your council tax as well if you are on a low income.

 

You take care of yourself now - and ditch that memory box; you and your daughter have decades of good memories to create before you have to say goodbye.:)

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There is a chance that if you took a credit card or unsecured loan out before 2007 there is a chance it will not be legally enforceble ! and the earlier it is before 2007 the better the chance they do not have an enforcable agreement

Im happy to help with support and my own opinions but as i have no legal qualifications If I offer any thoughts to your problems please take it as from my life experience only and not of any legal standing. Always take further advice from the legal experts in your final action,

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A lot of banks lie |MBNA, Barclaycard .Capital One, Natwest many other well known banks did not draw up the correct paperwork in their agreements so could be worth looking iinto,If they dont have an enforceable agreement you are in the driving seat so to speak and if they do have an enforceable one you still only pay them what you can afford

Im happy to help with support and my own opinions but as i have no legal qualifications If I offer any thoughts to your problems please take it as from my life experience only and not of any legal standing. Always take further advice from the legal experts in your final action,

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Will move your post to a more general area-you will find theres many people on here who have been in your situ-and as hard as it is to believe-some worse.

Deal with things a step at a time-where theres a problem,theres always a solution.....dealing with them in the right ways offers the best way to begin.

Theres no shortage and advice and guidance here-I have no doubt you will feel better by the weekend.

Have a happy and prosperous 2013 by avoiiding Payday loans. If you are sent a private message directing you for advice or support with your issues to another website,this is your choice.Before you decide,consider the users here who have already offered help and support.

Advice offered by Martin3030 is not supported by any legal training or qualification.Members are advised to use the services of fully insured legal professionals when needed.

 

 

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I would gather your info/bills and go to your local CAB or call National Debt line. You need some specialist advice and your little girl will always need her Mum!

 

If you get good advice now you will be in a good position to move forward with your life and your little one.

Nationwide-A&L-Halifax 1-Student Loans Company-NatWest-Virgin Media-Link-Capital One ALL WON!

Thames Credit -statute barred sent 13/11/08

BCW- prove debt letter- 14/08/08

Apex- CCA 14/08/08

Redcats UK- SAR 14/04/09

Call Serve- CCA 14/08/08

Littlewoods- no CCA letter 03/09/08- Lowells now

Wescot- CCA 19/9/08

Capital One/Debitas- now with Lowells

 

Any opinions are without prejudice & without liability. All information has been obtained from this site. If you are unsure, please seek professional advice. .

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Hello there Pebbles :)

 

I have been in your position my friend, and I know exactly how low you are feeling right now. I too was once at the very end of my tether and thinking of ending it all because of debt, but trust me the financial difficulties you have can be sorted out and once you feel more in control you will start to feel better and stronger.

 

I think to start with the best thing to do is to get some professional help from either the Citizens Advice Bureau or National Debtline as emmaf01 has said. They will be able to write to all your creditors on your behalf and give you advice and assistance about any benefits you may be entitled to as well.

 

There are letter templates and lots of advice on here of course, enabling you to write to all your creditors yourself personally if you wish, but if you are not feeling up to dealing with it right now, (I know I wasn't at first, until I got a lot stronger) start off by handing all your paperwork over to the CAB or National Debtline and let them write to all your creditors on your behalf.

 

That was the way I started - and once the burden was taken off my shoulders I began to feel stronger.

 

Most of all, forget about the memory box for your little girl - she needs you to be there for her - no financial worries are ever worth ending it all for. It may be worth you making an appointment to see your GP as well, and have a chat with him/her about how low you are feeling right now.

 

There is lots of support out there for you Pebbles, and you have come to the right place with this site as so many of us have been in your situation and know exactly how you feel, and we will support and help you all we can.

 

I will watch your thread and help and advise you wherever I can.

 

 

Much love

SG x

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Please note I am not legally qualified, I am offering advice based on my own personal experience in the hope that it may be of help to others in a similar situation.

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A big hug from me too x:)sunflower

Im happy to help with support and my own opinions but as i have no legal qualifications If I offer any thoughts to your problems please take it as from my life experience only and not of any legal standing. Always take further advice from the legal experts in your final action,

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Big hug from me too pebbles.

 

I would also suggest talking to your GP about how low you are feeling as (s)he may be able to help you.

 

Nothing is worth this much stress honey - you can and will get through the other side.

All help is merely my opinion only - please seek legal advice if you need to as I am only qualified in SEN law.

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Big hug from me too pebbles. I know you think there is no light at the end of the tunnel but believe me there is. I too have felt like you (not over debt), except I tried to kill myself. It’s not the answer I promise you.

Speak to your GP, these days they are fantastic, before long, you will see that you might owe loads of money but you still have a lovely daughter.

If my comments have been helpful please click my scales

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Hi again, Pebbles,

 

I promise you that I know exactly where you are right now. I too have a young daughter but felt exactly as you do now last Autumn when I was absolutely terrified by a very nasty debt collection agency. They called about a credit card balance and said I had to pay them the whole lot owing on the card, plus another £1000+ for them because they had bought the debt, immediately or they would start Court proceedings the followingimmediately take me to court and take steps to repossess my house. It was £9000+ in total and of course I had no means of finding that money. I said I could scrape together about £850 (by not paying my mortgage and giving them my child benefit) and they refused it, and said they would give me 24 hours to pay the whole lot.

 

I was absolutely hysterical, couldn't stop crying and didn't know whether to slash my wrists or drive my car into the river. Obviously I couldn't do either because my daughter was in the house asleep. In the morning I thought about how they had threatened me and frightened me and called the FSA, completely the wrong people to call but they told me to call the CCCS and I am so grateful to the girl I spoke to there because she helped immediately by telling me AIC could do nothing of the sort, and she gave me a reference number to quote to AIC and the other creditors. AIC backed down immediately - I couldn't believe it.

 

I knew there had to be other people in my situation but I had no idea how to find them and then I discovered CAG, and thank God that I did.

 

So many of us here are in these horrible situations due to circumstances like redundancy, illness, bereavement, failed businesses, the list is endless. So many of us here have felt utterly suicidal because we have lost control of our lives due to debt. We feel guilty that our children are suffering as a result, and we are currently powerless to get things back on track.

 

The main thing though is that every child is better off with his or her mother. Your daughter would be devastated if you committed suicide. It is something she would never get over. Forget the memory box and tell yourself she is not going to need it. She needs her MUM.

 

You will get a lot of help here, and if you ever just need to moan about it all that is fine too. The girls here are fantastic - and the boys are pretty good too. :)

 

I know how difficult it is to put on a brave face for a child, but you just have to do it. You feel in a constant state of stress and worry and can't and don't want to concentrate on anything else. Get out of the house with your daughter, a walk is free.

 

If you wake up in the night, don't just lie there, read a book. A very useful piece of advice I read is that you can only hold one thought in your mind at any one time - and that is true. If you are reading and engrossed you cannot be thinking about your debts and when you are tired you will sleep. The other one that works is to start listing red things you'll find in a supermarket: start with fruit, then veg, then flowers, then jam, then Edam cheese rind, and so on.

 

If you are near a large supermarket do shop from 7.00 p.m.-ish onwards. My local Asda has the most amazing reductions sometimes - 27p for 500gms of fresh cod last week (and it was fresh! - bought four packets and froze three!), and my local Co-op often does too - fresh pineapples for 25p!

 

You must eat more than a piece of bread or biscuits or you will make yourself ill. You can eat well for pennies if you look hard.

 

Finally, if you stick with CAG, you will see that there are people who really are in a worse situation. We all get very bad, down days, but usually there is something on the site that will make us laugh, and there is always support.

 

You and your daughter will get through it. We are here to help you.

 

Love,

Daniella

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