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The Silent Treatment

 

 

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving

each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the

next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early

morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence

(and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, 'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.'

He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning, the man woke

up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious,

he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he

noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

WIFE VS. HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a

word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument andneither of

them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard

of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives

of yours?'

 

'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws'

 

W O R D S

 

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use

a day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000.

The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat

everything to men...

 

The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'

 

 

CREATION

A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be

so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time. 'The wife responded,

'Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted

to me; God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

WHO DOES WHAT

A man and his wife were having an argument about who

should brew the coffee each morning.

The wife said, 'You should do it, because you get up first,

and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.'

The husband said, ' You are in charge of cooking around here and

you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for

my coffee.' Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in

the Bible that the man should do the coffee.'

Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.'

So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament

and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed

says..........'HEBREWS'

God may have created man before woman,

but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

 

SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT !

NEVER FORGET

 

[sIGPIC][/sIGPIC]

 

Help Our Hero's Website

 

http://www.helpforheroes.org.uk/

 

HIGHWAY OF HEROES

 

http://www.consumeractiongroup.co.uk/forum/bear-garden/181826-last-tribute-our-lads.html

 

Like Cooking ? check the Halogen Cooker thread

http://www.consumeractiongroup.co.uk/forum/bear-garden/218990-cooking-halogen-cookers.html

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All very true kip :lol::lol:

:)I am not an expert, but I can give good advice about Brighthouse:)

 

Am learning more and more about DCA's too :)

 

I have no legal experience and all advice given is based on the knowledge I've gained from this site.

 

<------If you think I have been helpful, please feel free to tip my scales - remember to put your CAG name though!

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