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mackenzie hall aka j2 solutions


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DOORSTEP COLLECTION VISIT – PLEASE READ CAREFULLY

YOUR REF 123456

Dear Cretins

I refer to your recent correspondence.

I note it is your intention to arrange a “doorstep call”, please be advised that under OFT rules, you can only visit me at my home if you make an appointment and I have no wish to make an appointment with you.

 

There is only an implied license under Common Law for people to be able to visit me on my property without express permission; the postman and people asking for directions etc (Armstrong v. Sheppard and Short Ltd [1959] 2 Q.B. per Lord Evershed M.R.). Therefore take note that I revoke license under Common Law for you, or your representatives to visit me at my property and if you do so, then you will be liable to damages for a tort of trespass and civil action will be taken.

 

 

In the highly unlikely event of one of their doorsteppers polluting your property telephone the Police and report a breach of the peace. These doorstep muppets have NO LEGAL POWERS whatsoever.

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