Search the Community
Showing results for tags 'funerals'.
Found 1 result
As I posted. I am not sure if this site is the best place for this sort of thing, but I am hoping to find out more about this so as to try to negate what I strongly suspect will be a contentious time when my mother dies. I live abroad and visited my mother in the UK when she turned 99 last month, as I have done for the last 9 or 10 years. She was pretty healthy last year but has begun to show her great age this year. Although still fairly compos mentis, she has become quite deaf and started to become more forgetful and confused. She can still get about somewhat but is now also very slow and needs help. Due to her confusion, she has invoked a pre-2007 Power of Attorney she made in 1992 so that my younger brother will be taking over her financial affairs, and I have some concerns about that, but I am 6,000 miles away and he is 10 miles from her, so it is reasonable that he takes over - with some scrutiny. However, it is his impulsive and thoughtless nature (and other issues) that he has displayed for years that concerns me and his conduct after she dies. He finds her an irritation and has voiced many times that once she dies, he will just 'go in with a skip and chuck the lot and be done with it'. As we are joint executors, we have a duty to do things properly and realise what we can for her estate (which won't be a lot) but he has refused point blank to make any contingency plans for when she does die, despite me suggesting it a number of times. Nor will he discuss anything and just shuts down, even switching off the phone mid-conversation. He just says 'I'm not doing anything and I'll deal with it all when the time comes'. He forgets there are two of us involved. This is all to do with deliberate stubbornness and not emotion about her impending death (which will be within 18 months, I suspect). As he has said many times, he would like her out of the way as he sees her an encumbrance. I'd like to be able to be prepared for any future problems, so if there is a way of discussing them on here, or a more appropriate site, perhaps other members could point me in the right direction. Thanks for reading.