Hi and thanks everyone for the responses. I Idid show them my husbands photo card, it was behind his oyster card, which I had put money on via pay as you go earlier, that is why it was not at the front. . I think that from what everyone has said, and the fact that it is strict liability, I am probably guilty The fact is I did intend to use his card, the fact I didn't think it was an offence is seemingly irrelevant. He did not ask me for any ID, but he did ask me if I had a photo card myself, which I said I did have one at home. This is true although I doubt I could find it.
My husband buys a monthly ticket, this one had a week to run. He actually thought he had lost it because I took that and his phone, without seeing him. he went and got a new photo card and a new ticket. We are moving anyway so he won't be using Southern much longer.
I don't think the ticket man was impressed that I couldn't get to my money to pay quickly, it actually transpired that I had my purse stolen whilst I was in london, Karma I suppose. I was very respectful to him, as I had been to London for a pre-op appointment and I was extremely upset anyway, so that sort of kept it in perspective at the time, although I was a bit taken aback that he yelled 'fraudster' at me from over his shoulder down the train. Too bad I guess.
I think that if interviewed I will just have to be totally honest and take the consequences.
I am wondering however, when I write to them to ask to settle out of court, should I tell them the whole story, of why I was in London, , my state of mind etc. no doubt they have heard it many a time?
My main concern obviously is avoiding conviction because it may hinder my visa application, I am frightened that they may be able to live in a country with my husband and I won't be able to go.
I was thinking of offering £300 to settle, is that a reasonable figure?
I am also worried that I have got my husband into trouble, he didn't know, but they only have my word for it. The only reason he didn't know was because I left in a rush and didn't see him, had I seen him he may have warned me of potential consequences.
How long will I have to wait to hear anything? I would rather get on with it now.
Sorry this is a bit incoherent , I have tried to have a positive day with the kids, but my mind is all over the place.