Could anyone with experience of this please give advice because we really are at our wits end.*
Today my partner recieved a 'review' of what Child Support he must pay each month for the next year for his 2 children from his ex wife and is being collected by a DEO straight from his wages every month so he cannot do anything about it.
Despite regular payments for his children he now has 'arrears' to pay which have seemingly appeared out of nowhere. If regular payments of the required amount on the CSA's demand have been paid then how could there possibly be any arrears?*
To complicate the matter a whole lot further:
My partner and his ex wife separated 13 years ago.*
After divorcing on grounds of adultery on her part the house was sold and she kept the equity that the house had made and my partner saw not a penny of it.
However, he still had his children at the weekends and he and his ex wife arranged and agreed maintenance payments between themselves which was adhered to. After moving on with his own life he later met somebody else, much to his ex wifes dismay. She soon made things difficult in regards to access with his children by stipulating that he wasn't to have the children around his new partner. As you can imagine things got out of hand and the poor kids involved were just trapped in the middle and soon didnt want to see their Father because of the atmosphere created and the fact their mum forbid them to go to his house if his partner was there. She made it all but impossible for him to see his children and then filed a claim for CSA despite him paying regular maintainance and wanting to be a part of his children's lives.*
He has not seen his children for a few years now and from what she has said; they sadly do not want to see him either.
The ex wife has since remarried. They have a very plush 4 bedroom house in a nice part of London and her and her husband both have very good jobs each earning around the 60k mark a year. My partners kids never go without and they refer to the new husband as their Dad.
My partner and I, like a lot of working class families, are not just feeling the pinch of the credit crunch but are also suffering financially.*
My partner has a low paid job and I am on statutory maternity leave only bringing in £28.73 per week.*
We have a baby boy who is almost 6 months old and between us have outgoings and debts that exhaust our income. We live in a 1 berdoom place which we rent and only just get by every month and this £400 a month now being taken from the pittance we bring in a month is literally going to send us over the edge.
We have tried speaking to the CSA and they do not care about what our outgoings are and say that the CSA payments much come before anything else... Even our 6 month old child who has to go without. The preposterous idea that we 'take out a loan' to cover the arrears is just laughable - we've reached our limit in credit with trying to survive as it is!*
I must state that we do not qualify for help from the government as apparently we earn just above the breadline for the qualifying margin to recieve any benefits.
While I whole heatedly agree that parents do not live with their child/children should help towards the financial cost of having them I do think that it should be made reasonable and affordable in a way which is fair to the absent parents as well as the mother and children.
The very fact of the matter is this: paying this now £400 per month means we will not be able to afford anything else. Every penny we bring in is accounted for so the CSA payment will have to come out of something else, be it food, electric, the rent etc. we just cannot afford it and we will end up homeless! How can they see my 6 month old child on the street. That is inhumane when the children the CSA payment is for will not be affected at all if they didn't recieve as much or at all for that matter!
We do not have anywhere else to go, friends and family cannot put us up so what are we to do?*
Like I said.. I agree parents should pay for their kids but when the ex wifes situation is a pretty cushy lifestyle and ours is about to see us and our baby homeless it rings alarm bells that something's not right.*
The £400 to the ex wife is a pittance to her but everything to us to ensure warmth food and a food over our heads. Why should my partner pay such an extortionate amount to kids his is restricted to see which results in the child he has living with him to go without essentials?
What do we do?*