I am not sure of the correct place in the forums for this post so if it is in the wrong place please move it to the appropriate thread.

Story:

Our disabled daughter and her partner of 20 years having being living together in housing association flats every since they got together.

Over time they have moved about 4 times and in every case this has been directly due to their behaviour and drinking.

It was not to bad originally but since they were moved into a block of flats (3rd floor with no lift) my daughter who suffers from hydrosypholis and is weak on her right side has difficulty climbing the stairs.

We used to be able to keep them fairly well in check but because we cannot make the stairs ourselves the drinking and behaviour has gotten worse.

It got so bad that she was taken to court for pouring beer over the occupier of the ground floor flat and was fined for it.

Her partner however got violent during a heavy drinking session and hit her causing server bruising to her face. (not the first time)

He has just been found guilty and has to pay a fine.

They are not permitted to have contact as part of the court rulings.

When my daughter was taken to court (beer offence) she was hit with a cannot return to her flat as part of the rulings and the judge asked if we could take her in for 2-3 days while other accommodation was found for her.

The housing association she was with said they were not prepared to help and forced my daughter out of her flat as they did not want her in any of their properties. (I can understand their point due to their past).

We were given a number to call to a person who helps find properties/places for people like my daughter. and we called him and he got om the case.

Everytime we try to call him for a progress report he always seems to be "on holiday" and when do actually talk to him there always seems to be excuses as to where any sort of decision has been made.

Currently waiting for the outcome of a interview she had with a group who deals with people like my daughter and helps them get back on the right path (so to speak). We phoned again today to find out if she has been accepted only to find out that they are waiting for a certain person to come back off holiday (yet again) and then have another interview and a decision will then be made.

She really does need to have her own place with proper supervision and help.

Our main problem now is that the court said 2-3 days and it's now over 3 months.

In all that time we have kept her away from both drink and her partner and she is coping ok.

We do have to be careful of what we say when she is around as we think she is a little paranoid when she hears people talking as she thinks they are always talking about her.

Our own life has been disrupted considerably and are getting to the point where we feel we cannot do anything without her being in the background.

Is their anything we can do about this excessive time span given we were told 2-3 days and something should be sorted for her.

as soon as you said yes then they said yippee and hid behind the nearest wall and pretended the problem has now gone away. She is no longer homeless so they arent that interested in finding her somewhere to live, especially with ther behavioral problems they think they are doing her and her future neighbours a favour.

basically you have to chuck her out on the street to get anywhere.

Yeah I agree entirely with your post concerning them shouting yippee.

My wifes really feeling down about saying yes and the fact they have basically done the dirty on us. She even asked three times if this was just going to be 2-3 days and she was reassured that was what it was going to be.

Whats really got my goat is that me and the wife were planning to downsize from our current property this year and has already made some plans and started looking for suitable property. This as fairly well stuffed that in the head.

My wife has been onto several housing associations and associations that help people like my daughter and it's just feels like we are being passed from one to another.

So. other than actually declaring her homeless what other options are open to us?

Yeah I agree entirely with your post concerning them shouting yippee.

 

My wifes really feeling down about saying yes and the fact they have basically done the dirty on us. She even asked three times if this was just going to be 2-3 days and she was reassured that was what it was going to be.

 

Whats really got my goat is that me and the wife were planning to downsize from our current property this year and has already made some plans and started looking for suitable property. This as fairly well stuffed that in the head.

 

My wife has been onto several housing associations and associations that help people like my daughter and it's just feels like we are being passed from one to another.

 

So. other than actually declaring her homeless what other options are open to us?

“They” haven’t done the dirty on you. Your daughter has.

I have to disagree with you disgruntled

When you are asked if we could take her in for 2-3 days whilst arrangements were made for her to go somewhere else and virtually nothing has been done to get her a place in 3 months then I do think that they have done dirty to us.

She might have well started the whole problem but it was the court asking for us to take her in and as a direct result the LHA took the opportunity to wash their hands by getting her to give up her old property. Because of this it basically shut the door on her getting into several independent living units.

We were just getting over a traumatic 5 years during which several family members died including both my wife's parents. My wife's own health is not good with her own medical conditions worsening. My own mother has had to undergo treatment for cancer twice and there were several other stress related things going on as well. We just didn't want all this on top.

We really did not want this extra right now and my wife really wishes she had said we could not have taken her in.

then your daughter needs to tell the council that she is been thrown out next thursday and you actually do that so she turns up at the housing office on the thurs morning and says am now homeless what are you going to do about it? they will call you and you refuse to have her back.

You have to be cruel to be kind

Sadly, I have to agree with you. Sometimes you do have to be cruel to be kind.

Going to try a couple of other places which we have found which appear to be the type she needs. Have to see how it goes.