10 yrs

Hi, I've had my grievance with my very large employer upheld in full (shocked!) The grievance related to a number of issues which they bullet pointed as Refusal to implement Reasonable adjustments in relation to my disability , attendance and welfare procedures not followed at all Treated unfairly and differently to other employees by my senior manger. Incorrect information given to me which caused me to fear for my job. And confidentiality issues by my team manager. I'm delighted that the investigation was done properly and they took my evidence seriously. The company has said they will be issuing retraining to people involved and making company wide learning points. During the investigation meeting i was asked what outcome I wanted if it was upheld, I requested an exit package as I no longer felt comfortable working with my manager and senior manager. However the grievance letter says they feel mediation is more appropriate. Where do I stand in refusing mediation? I've told my employer that I feel the relationship has irretrievably broken down and even if I moved teams the senior manager would be the same. I feel mediation is not appropriate as they are such a senior manager they hold all the power in the situation and that it could not be a balanced mediation. To be honest I've lost all trust in her and my team. I just want to start again, I'll never forget the horrible things she has done and said. If they insist on mediation and I quit my job do I have ground for constructive dismissal. Ive been off since this started with stress, early conciliation has ended, I have 3 weeks left to make a claim if needed but i dont know if I can or should. i just want to hide under a rock and cry:( can anyone help