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Im thinking marrying my girlriend of 3 years. In that time we havent lived together. I wanted to know the consequences of being financially tied to someone with a pretty chronic credit history. She owed £32,000 (and is now making regular payments) in various debts and had defaults all over the place.
Things are getting better, but I wanted to know what the consequences to me would be if:-
1: We move in together and share an address
2: We get married and have a joint account/ shared mortgage.
Does it affect my ability to get a mortgage/ get credit? I know it sounds selfish, but it IS an issue and Id like to be prepared.
PeaceLily,
When you get married, your joint financial data will be linked in the credit reference agencies. Past financial data belonging to your wife will not concern you.
However, I trust you know the difference between secured and unsecured debt. If her debts are unsecured, it means that she is solely responsible for them. If they are secured on a property you own jointly through a mortgage, the registered owners of the property will face credit problem on default.
Meanwhile, it will be a good idea if you begin to help her sort out the debt now because you cannot escape the problem of being skint when you get married. Why? If she has so much debt to pay off, it means you will have to face the current bills yourself. That could set you back loads of cash depending on how much you get from employment and how much she is able to help with current household bills.
One way you could help her now is to request the full details of all her debt - YES I mean all her debt. You will then go through all the paperwork and check what you can claim back in the form of unlawful charges to her account in the past. You may not know the information unless you request information using SAR letter for each of her creditors.
THanks for this.
Yeah, Im already helping her out paying off some of the larger debts.
I worry a little about her her attitude though, not sure its changed towards spending. And yes I am worried about sounding more like her dad than her boyfriend! She is still so into these big ticket items,We went shopping and the things she was looking at were Shirts costing £80/ £90 and coats at £200. I feel like Im judging her- which I dont want to do.
Im happy to help with this lot of debt as much as I can, but I really dont want to do this all again in 5 years time. Id be furious. Do big spenders ever change?
How about if we are living together at the same address but not married?
*sigh*
You can tow the line of cohabiting if you like it. That will reduce your commitment to the relationship if that is what you want.
You have to warn her about her big spending habits now. It does not make you her dad or her mum. You will be protecting your own, her own and your children future, married or not.
If she refuse to change her ways and face up to the outstanding debt payments, I will suggest that even cohabiting will be too good a commitment from you.
I definitely will not want to go with somebody that is not considerate. The consequence of her big spending will not tell on her alone, it will tell on you and your children whether you stay together or not.
If you decide to get out of the relationship at a later date, you may become trapped through having your children in a failed relationship. That can be messy because the court will want you to pay over the odds to care for your children. I know somebody who simply had to travel away from the UK to escape the claws of child support agency.
Take heed now why you can. If you like the relationship to continue, then warn her about her inconsiderate behaviour. If she refuse to change, you know what to do. You can never change her way of life if she is not willing to listen to you and your reasoning.
Love me, Love my credit rating?
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