Over two years my wife has drained my bank account of £40k.

I'm a complete idiot, but did not even know I had internet banking,

my wife obviously set it up behind my back even supplying her phone number as my contact,

I always asked her to check my balance & trusted her

not realising she gambled all my money online using all my details & transferring money from my account to her own.

I've asked lloyds why they did not alert me looking at the transactions & they say they only send a text,

surely they have to be responsible in some way letting this happen,

but they tell me it's my own fault,

because my wife had my card & pin which she took from the post without me even knowing,

but my argument is she didn't need my pin for thousands of online transactions.

I think you have to start doing some research to find out how she was able to go into your branch – or else deal with on the telephone and set up Internet banking on your account.

Also, have there been any other debts incurred in your name? Have you checked your credit file?

Are you still with your wife? Are you intending to call the police?

if this goes back several years

to get access to online banking

all you had to do was type in the number which they sent in a letter to the registered address at the time of account opening.

I activated a 2007 Lloyds business account internet access using a number I found in a letter from 2007 last year!

no checks whatsoever!

I think you have to start doing some research to find out how she was able to go into your branch – or else deal with on the telephone and set up Internet banking on your account.

 

Also, have there been any other debts incurred in your name? Have you checked your credit file?

 

Are you still with your wife? Are you intending to call the police?

She openly admitted to opening my post & setting up Internet banking,

she never had to go into a branch & if the bank did send a query apparently it was just a text message asking for confirmation to the transaction with a yes or no reply.

She's run mounds of debts in my name I'm only just starting to gather everything.

Not informed police yet, we've got a 3 year old...my wife is trying the Edited card!

You are obviously and justifiably angry.

The Edited card as you put it is very emotional but may I suggest you at least take some notice.

Is your wife showing any remorse and willingness to get help?

First stop would be a visit to the GP.

Do you think there may be a link between the birth of your child and the spiral into gambling?

If you want to recover the money the police will have to be told I think but at the same time, do you want to save your marriage?

The bank may well say "if you haven't noticed £40k going missing over 2 years, you must have delegated authority to manage your account to your wife" ; and use that as a reason to decline to act.

You are obviously and justifiably angry.

 

The Edited card as you put it is very emotional but may I suggest you at least take some notice.

 

Is your wife showing any remorse and willingness to get help?

 

First stop would be a visit to the GP.

 

 

 

Do you think there may be a link between the birth of your child and the spiral into gambling?

 

If you want to recover the money the police will have to be told I think but at the same time, do you want to save your marriage?

No I my marriage is over because I've also found out now she is addicted to cocaine & I'm so worried for my child, but she won't let me take her with me, I don't know what to do

No I my marriage is over because I've also found out now she is addicted to cocaine & I'm so worried for my child, but she won't let me take her with me, I don't know what to do

As you are married you have parental responsibilities (and rights). Long gone are the days when the father has no rights.

Your wife sounds quite unwell to me, a gambling addict with a cocaine habit.

I still wouldn't discount her threats but you need to protect yourself and your daughter.

Do you have the ability to look after your daughter, by that I mean caring for her while you are at work etc.

Over two years my wife has drained my bank account of £40k.

 

I'm a complete idiot, but did not even know I had internet banking,

my wife obviously set it up behind my back even supplying her phone number as my contact,

 

I always asked her to check my balance & trusted her

not realising she gambled all my money online using all my details & transferring money from my account to her own.

 

I've asked lloyds why they did not alert me looking at the transactions & they say they only send a text,

 

surely they have to be responsible in some way letting this happen,

 

but they tell me it's my own fault,

because my wife had my card & pin which she took from the post without me even knowing,

but my argument is she didn't need my pin for thousands of online transactions.

Why should the bank have to accept any responsibility with this?

It's an awful and terrible thing to happen to you

but have you not opened a bank statement at all in the last 2 years?

It's your bank account,

if she set up online banking without you knowing

how could you ask her to check your balance for you?

If she took your card and PIN from the post without you knowing how could you use your card,

surely you would have your card in your possession?

it is fraud.

if/if not the op wishes to follow that criminal route is one for them to decide upon.

dx