Reposession - What would you do?

[Ex Banker]

Before Christmas last year, a friend came to me, asking to borrow money,she said she was having difficultly keeping up with her mortgage payments. At this point, instead of putting them further into debt, I helped prepare a 'statement of means/I&E statement' for her and her husband to give to the court. They appealed against the impending judgement, and the debt was rescheduled by the mortgage lender.

It transpires that the mortgage is in arrears again, and, once again, the courts are involved as they have defaulted on the arrangement made at the start of the year. I again declined to lend money, instead offering to assist with correspondence and seeking the right advice.

Now, there are a couple of layers of complexity to this story:-

• She lied in January, she hasn't told her husband about ANY of the arrears, he believes she's making the payments and everything is rosy. She forged his signature on the court paperwork I helped her with. She goes home each lunchtime to destroy any bank statements, letters, etc etc.
• She told me that her arrears were £6k and were due to her being off work on SSP for 3 months during 2006 plus and additional amount applied as charges. When she presented the arrears letter, she's in 12k of arrears, all accrued in the last 12 months. When I asked why she had lied, she had no answer, other than to say that she knew I wouldn't lend her £12k, but I might lend her £6k!
• She hasn't made any attempts to cut back and address the arrears, she is still buying clothes, drinking, decorating the house etc, etc and it's only the shock of the court action that seems to have had any impact.
• She is presently attempting to borrow money from personal friends, promising to pay them back within a month or two. She has no means to do this.
• I advised her that I was unwilling to proceed with helping her, based on the fact that it meant I was party to deceiving her husband. I urged her to tell him or said that I would. She flaty refused on the basis that he would leave her. She sobbed and said that she had already written a letter to her children, apologising for taking her own life. She went on to say how she has a supply of pills and will take them if he finds out.

There are heaps more facts, I suspect there is more debt than she is telling me about. I also strongly suspect that her husband has given her the money for the mortgage, but she has spent it. I have frequently been amazed how a part-time receptionist can afford to have new clothes every weekend. This could be a very compelling reason for her not to want him to know.

So I have a few options available to me:-

Firstly, is to break her trust and tell the husband what is going on. This isn't something I relish doing. I suspect that, even with a positive resolution, I would be vilified for being the 'whistleblower', thus losing their friendship. I also have to consider if her suicidal threats are real.

Secondly, I have details of the mortgage lender, including contact name and account number. I appreciate that Data Protection Act prevents them discussing the account with me, however I wonder if the lender would be interested in knowing her husband is completely in the dark, together with his direct line at work. Anyone have any thoughts on this? The lender is Platform.

Another take on this, is to call him at work, leaving a message as though it were from the mortgage lender, asking for him to contact them to discuss the arrears. I'm not keen to do this, however, I will do it, if others think it is a wise course.

Lastly, I do nothing, accept that their domestic arrangements are nothing to do with me and let the ramifications affect the innocent. However, I feel morally bound to consider the needs of a hardworking husband and two school-aged children.

It may be worth adding that the husband comes from a family who would appear to be able to assist them financially/legally/professionally, if their son knew!

So, what would you do? Or, does anyone have any insights or shared experiences, please.

Even though this isn't my problem, this is the third sleepless night I have had. One of the many reasons I left personal lending many years ago!

[sequenci]

Originally Posted by Ex Banker

Firstly, is to break her trust and tell the husband what is going on. This isn't something I relish doing. I suspect that, even with a positive resolution, I would be vilified for being the 'whistleblower', thus losing their friendship. I also have to consider if her suicidal threats are real.

Difficult situation this one, I can fully understand the difficulty of the situation you're in; the thing is - if nothing is done soon they are going to lose their house, some has to be done sharpish. The suicidal threats are a difficult one to guage and you have to take them seriously even if they may just be attention seeking. If it was me I would probably tell the husband, but that is me and of course I don't know the full situation.

Secondly, I have details of the mortgage lender, including contact name and account number. I appreciate that Data Protection Act prevents them discussing the account with me, however I wonder if the lender would be interested in knowing her husband is completely in the dark, together with his direct line at work. Anyone have any thoughts on this? The lender is Platform.

I'm not even sure if they would be that bothered, my experience of Platform is less than rosy.

Another take on this, is to call him at work, leaving a message as though it were from the mortgage lender, asking for him to contact them to discuss the arrears. I'm not keen to do this, however, I will do it, if others think it is a wise course.

that is quite an interesting idea although it might be better to try and pacify him whilst giving him the news yourself, he might take it easier that way?!?!

Lastly, I do nothing, accept that their domestic arrangements are nothing to do with me and let the ramifications affect the innocent. However, I feel morally bound to consider the needs of a hardworking husband and two school-aged children.

you seem like a good friend to have.

It may be worth adding that the husband comes from a family who would appear to be able to assist them financially/legally/professionally, if their son knew!

so at least there could be a way out.

Do they have other (non-priority credit) debts?

can they actually afford the mortgage and a little bit towards the arrears each month?

[Ex Banker]

Thank-you for such a comprehensive reply.

I don't know about any other unsecured debts, this lady had told so many lies that I could easily imagine she has other creditors. I know that they have an O/D, but to what extent, I don't know, nor does she, as she doesn't keep any bank statements.

Yes they can afford the normal mortgage repayment, plus an addition amount towards the arrears.

With regard to Platform, do you know if they are a sub-prime lender, primarily? I can't put my finger on why, but I suspect there are previous debt problems here. She has all the characteristics of a 'serial-borrower' and shopaholic. Speaking of Platform, I had wondered if I called them and said that I had declined to advise Mr & Mrs X, on the basis that Mrs X had forged her husbands signature in front of me and felt I had a duty to dislose potential fraud taking place - they may be more interested? Of course, this could backfire as it may prompt them to speed up the repossession process. Although in this climate, surely lenders want to keep people in their homes?

With regard to the re-posession, they have had a court reposession order issued on the 18th June, that states it is postponed until after 2nd June. Does the lender have to apply for an Enforcement Order next? Can anyone tell me what are the likely timescales to this process?

Thanks again

[not so goldengirl]

ok so is she going to court or rather when? Can she not remortgage she should tell her oh but she could always say they have got a better deal. Really the big thing hear is she needs help with her spending,she obviously has a problem. I am sure she is not the first and wont be the last not to tell her oh about the debt go to the cab with her and get advice from them. Do an income and expenditure again with her and try to make sure she adhears to it. The husband cant be so naive that he has not seen a bank statement in the last xxxxxx years. Lastly she wants to be grateful she has you for a friend.

[Willy Wonker]

I am in a serious financial mess myself and know what pressure it can have, however, if I were you....
The last thing you want to happen is for the bailiffs to turn up and turf the family out while hubby is at work and kids at school, so if by telling the hubby you can prepare them for this, then I think you will be seen as doing "the right thing".
I dont think you need to go into alot of detail with him. If may be enough to tell him that the wife has approached you for a short term loan to help out with mortgage problems. That should alert him to have a look at this himself. (He'll then find out the extent of the problem) You shouldnt be put in a position to lie for her. If she asks you to do this then she really isnt helping herself. Best she comes clean, as if he was going to leave her then he certainly would after the house was repossessed and his children get thrown into the street!
As with every case (mine included)...its not over till its over, so theres still a case for saving the house.....but only I think with the husbands knowledge so maybe he can take control of the mortgage payments.
Hope this helps. Good luck!
WW

[Ell-enn]

Hi, there is no doubt you are in the horns of a dilemma with this situation. However, I agree with some of the others that telling the husband is the most sensible (if not the most palatable) option. If there is any possibility of them being able to get financial assistance from their family, then this is the time for them to ask for it.

This woman obviously needs help with her financial responsibility problem, and the only way she will get it is by confronting the demons that have led her to this situation.

If they are in a position to make the mortgage payments then a N244 should be submitted to the court asking for a hearing to offer a payment plan going forward.

I don't envy you the position you are in, or indeed the task you have in front of you, but I believe there is no other option but to tell the husband. You may lose a friend - however, I'm sure it would be easier to live with than the knowledge that bailiffs have evicted a family and the resultant heartache.

Whatever you decide, time is obviously of the essence.

Please keep us informed of the outcome.

Kind regards

Ell-enn