emmahavens
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They are really hard to ignore when they steal it straight from your wages, and I say steal because that is what they do!
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We know how you feel. My husband phoned the CSA after he split with his ex, and asked to pay her money (as she wouldn't take it directly from him) - the told him it couldn't be done that way, so my husband left it and carried on with his life. 18months later (just before we got married) we were hit with a bill for 18months worth of arrears as the CSA had set the claim up anyway (however we didn't know this at the time and just assumed his ex had claimed). We are now in the situation where the CSA take 40% of my husbands earnings every month - often leaving us borrowing money off friends and family just to pay our rent - where as his ex lives rent free at her mums, has all her bills paid for - so this is just extra spending money (on top of her salary which is double that of our combined salaries!). We are now on the verge of loosing our house - and in the CSA phone operators words 'it is our problems, not that of the CSA!!!' We have already given up our car (only a ford fiesta, but it gave us our freedom) and moved to an area much cheaper where my little boy will not be allowed to the park or out to play because of the type of area it is. I'd like to say I can give you good advice on how to deal with them - however we have had no luck at all so far! And like most fathers - on top of dealing with the problems the CSA cause we also have his vindictive ex to deal with, who withholds contact for no reason, has made my husband quit the TA (whcih she also goes too, and provided us with that little additional income), and regularly slates us to friends.
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