A say in the life of ....

I don't often go to swanky do's and if I do, if it's very formal, I normally use a DJ which is shared by a few friends of about the same size. The protocol has always been that you leave the dickie-bow in one of the pockets. ( If your mate has been invited to the same do, then you have to rent a suit.)

So when I got invited to a very posh do - including a British Ambassador and several judges, I got the suit but blow me! no bow-tie in any of the pockets.

So at about 8.00 in the evening I was trawling up and down the road, open-necked in a dinner suit trying to find a shop which could sell me a black bow-tie.

Nothing.

Even quite likely department stores simply don't sell them anymore. Black ties - Yes. Black Bow-ties - No.

To say that I was getting into a right two-'n-eight is putting it mildly.
Anyway, I spotted an upmarket restaurant so I hurried in - and Yes! all the waiters were wearing black bow-ties.

You can guess the rest. One rather surprised and amused waiter. I was a score down and a bow-tie up. Nasty little Velcro job but it did the trick and I went to the dinner.

The final secret joke is that my dickie-bow had little points at each end of the bow. I think that it must be standard for catering staff because the only other pointy-end bow-ties at the function were the ones being worn by the waiters.

I could feel them all looking at me rather curiously.