 Debt
In one word Debt has affected my life for over 24 years and I bear the scars.
In 1983 I was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s disease, right from the day I was diagnosed the debt began. I had bought my first car on finance and it went from there. I couldn't make the payments. The bank gave me an overdraft that ended up costing me a fortune as I went overdrawn when my wages didn't go in on time and I was paid by cheque by my employer.
I struggled through my treatment and eventually I was able to go back to work. But I had debts, enormous ones at the time. I was only 19. My family were ok financially but not rich and I couldn't face telling them I had all this debt.
I met my husband 12 months after my treatment finished, we set up home together but odds were stacked against us. He had debts to pay, He had a son from a previous relationship and he was responsible for paying maintenance. I had no problem with this, but the whole situation was such a strain on me sometimes I was working literally to pay bills and had nothing left for us. All our friends were going on holiday and loving every minute. It got me down as it wasn't the life I though it would be.
My mum won some money on the pools and for the first time our lives changed. She gave us the deposit for our first home and we were so excited. With the money she gave us we found a small 2 bedroom house. Ideal for a young family. My Mum and my Gran had a big fall out, it was over my youngest brother. The argument was so bad that my Gran had to leave my mums house. In the end she came to live with me and my husband. As I was very close to her (she had been like a mum to me) it didn't seem a problem.
We got the keys to our new home and on the day we moved in I didn't feel well. It turned out I was pregnant. Something that I never thought would happen. When my daughter came along everything was perfect, but like always it all unfolded in front of us. The introduction of the poll tax, interest rates on our mortgage. Our perfect world was again shattered. I suffered from post natal depression.
We struggled and struggled to make ends meet. It was always there always following us like a bad smell. My marriage was failing and the pressures of every day life started to show. More in me as I couldn't cope. I got pregnant again. It wasn't the best time for my marriage or our finances. But my son was perfect, he was beautiful. He was born on the 1st April 1994 he was 7 weeks early but he was so full of life. That wasn't to be a celebration of life for us. He was taken ill at 12 weeks, he was so ill, they couldn't diagnose what was wrong only that his blood kept disappearing and he was very ill. They thought it could be because I had had chemotherapy but they weren't sure.
We got over a another hurdle and everything seemed ok. We still had debts and we still lived from hand to mouth. My husband couldn’t take any more and left me. He took everything and left me with nothing. I was £20,000 in debt in fear of loosing my home. I went to work and did my best to stay on top of everything. But the debts I had were escalating to a huge degree. So I remortgage my house, I bought my husband out and everything was lifted. For the first time in years I was able to breath.
Then my Gran became ill, she had a series of strokes and was not able to look after herself properly. I gave up my full time job and worked part time. But there were days when she was ill I couldn't go to work. I stayed at home to look after her. The debts started again, I was working 30 hours a week, looking after Gran 24 hours a day and caring for 2 small children. I was depressed not eating, I had to feed them before me. We were on the breadline.
My Gran died in 2004, after a long illness and she lived at home with me until 2002. When she died I had all of her debts plus I had to pay for the shortfall of her care. Her total debts with everything amounted to £8500. She had no life insurances, she had put all of her savings into helping me pay the mortgage.
I was devastated, when she died. I couldn't get my head around the fact she had gone. My health began to suffer. I had bailiffs coming to the house. I had debt collectors on the phone. Not just chasing my debts but hers as well. I asked my husband to help. He came home. We decided to make a fresh start and move house. We would sell ours, buy a new house and with the difference we would pay of everything. Great - no, when the money offer came through it was £12000 short. We thought well not to bad we can manage this.
But no it wasn't meant to be again. Bank charges started mounting when I accidentally went over my overdraft whilst on holiday. It a matter of months I had accumulated £1100 charges. My health took a dive and I had to take time of my job. It went on and on. I cried myself to sleep, I feel so low. The bailiffs turned up my home in April chasing £254 that we had forgotten to pay. My husband had bank charges of £750. Npower had made a mistakes with how they had set the payments and won't let us pay any less than £168 a month as opposed to paying £98. It goes on and on and on.
I received a letter from the council sent us a letter refusing to accept the offer we made of paying £25 a month of the council tax arrears. Things became to much and I collapsed, I couldn't breath, I passed out for a matter of second but it seemed like hours. I went to hospital. After tests they found that I have a blockage in my left artery. It is so near my heart that it is dangerous, it could lead to complications. So the Consultant won't operate, he has given me medication.
I can't thing straight, we again have dents that we can't pay. We have done our best, but it's just so hard. My health is not good, my finances are not healthy, I am frightened that my life could be taken away from me. Whilst most of our creditors have been fantastic offering us support. The council are awful, they will not accept anything less than us paying £100 on top of our council tax. HFC have passed our debts to Weightmans and they have added £1280 to the debt. I can't think straight on one hand I have to worry about all of our debts, on the other hand I have my health.
So debt has affected my health, but my health has caused my debt. Does that make sense? | 
