Chat up line: Guaranteed results ***now includes holiday chat-up lines***

barracad · 18th June 2007, 23:52

Saw a girl on the bus today, bit of a fox, so I sat down opposite and attracted her attention by bursting a balloon. “I am a tomato,” I announced, when she looked up. “So am I a fruit... or a vegetable?” She didn't know, so I explained to her in a nerd voice that technically I am a fruit in that I grow above ground, but HMRC consider me a vegetable for the purposes of import tax.

Sadly, she did not speak English, otherwise we would have been getting naked within the hour. I have personally had over six hundred women using this method.

Lula · 18th June 2007, 23:54

Personally, i don't think so dear

Dinkydoo · 18th June 2007, 23:57

Stick to driving Stig.....lol

Curlyben · 18th June 2007, 23:57

barracad, you're dreaming again or the meds are wearing off.

Mr lex · 19th June 2007, 00:01

Never worked for me either,

I caught Mrs Lex with Drugs and a 12 month gentle rehab, how do you think I ended up with such a fine Lass ???

Lex

Lula · 19th June 2007, 00:03

Quote:

Originally Posted by lexandergundogs

Never worked for me either,

I caught Mrs Lex with Drugs and a 12 month gentle rehab, how do you think I ended up with such a fine Lass ???

Lex

You plied her with those Bloomin Burgers!!!!

Mr lex · 19th June 2007, 00:04

Well, it's a sort of durg, Lula, you still up girl, how's the monkey ???

Curlyben · 19th June 2007, 00:05

Who said monkey ??

Mr lex · 19th June 2007, 00:10

ohhh, why the sad face, Curly ???

Curlyben · 19th June 2007, 00:12

Ment to be an angry one, thought the red colour kind of gave it away.

Lula · 19th June 2007, 00:14

Quote:

Originally Posted by lexandergundogs

Well, it's a sort of durg, Lula, you still up girl, how's the monkey ???

He is still poorly, insisted that I sit with him ALL DAY on the sofa and then take him up to our bed this afternoon for a nap!! Doesnt this child understand that we are going on holiday on Thursday and I have washing ironing, housework and packing to do? poor little mite, although he has stopped puking and producing chicken korma from his rear, so hopefully he will be a little better tomorrow and let me get on :o

jansus · 19th June 2007, 18:22

Sadly, she did not speak English, otherwise we would have been getting naked within the hour. I have personally had over six hundred women using this method.[/quote]

but did they notice???

barracad · 19th June 2007, 18:23

How could they fail to notice The Stig?!

jansus · 19th June 2007, 18:29

its obviously your modesty that attracts them.

barracad · 19th June 2007, 20:59

84 people have looked at this thread so far, so there is clearly a need for good chat-up lines. As we're entering holiday season, I thought I'd share some useful chat-up lines to use whilst on holiday... enjoy!

At the beach:
“J'ai un paquet charmant de noix de coco.”
I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts. (To a Frenchman)

“Ci bisogna il permesso del barone per scoppare.”
You need the Baron’s permission to ****. (Italian)

At the hotel:
"Deine Katze ist ein moralischer Idiot"
Your cat is a moral idiot (German)

위대한 당의 령도밑에 조국의 존엄과 위력이 힘있게 떨쳐지고 사회주의강성대국건설을 위한 선군혁명총진군이 힘있게
I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts. Let’s mutilate US imperialism. (Korean)

“Vienen unos osos. ¡Que mamera!”
Some bears are coming. What a pain in the arse! (Spanish)

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